.. to argue ( all the time ) with my husband because housework ...

[Lilica02]

I have a 4 and 1 year old boy! Even tough I try so hard to keep up with housework it seems like a battle lost!! I just can't give up trying otherwise what state we would live in? So all I do is take kids to park and actitivities then work at home! Problem is my husband wants me to spend time with him when he has time free and I want to take the opprtunity to do some cleaning while he can spend time with kids!! Even tough sounds crazy my house is no near to be sparkling, also have a cleaner on Thursdays that is helping ... Just can't help arguing about are messy house!!! Any ideas please??!!

Less stuff. You can't tidy stuff, you just shuffle it around.

And everyone needs to do their bit.

Make a list of jobs that need doing, split it in half and give your DH one half. Both of you doing the jobs will get them completed more quickly leaving you time to spend together.

What's making the mess. I used to tidy once a day before DH came home. It was manageable. Storage boxes and a portable hand hoover were my friends.also, all stuff non child related had it4 place and was put awaystraight away. DH was happy to take them out for an hour or two at weekends though while I did housework and had some time on my own

A cleaner?

I've tried today! I cleaned the rooms then phone rang it and i had to stop and play with my baby because we have a business from home ( which is stressful, baby can't cry! ) is his day off today do I asked him to finish cleaning kitchen and I would carry on playing ... after half hour went to see he was sitting down with my old boy, done the kitchen but no at my standards and hasn't carry on hoovering the floor, the Hoover was already out, plugged in the muddle of leaving room!! Then I had to argue, he grumpily stayed with baby and I cleaned for half hour and I felt happier because house was a bit more clean and baby can safely stay on the floor!! Then just feel like punishing him and not spending time with him just want to do my own things!! Ended up here for the first time I know is really boring talk girls just felt like putting out!! Sorry !!

Why are you cleaning if you have a cleaner? What is making the mess to need the hoover between cleaner visits. Babies cry - it's normal.

Well you said it yourself, he did do it just not to your "standards".

Lower your standards. Join us slatterns. It's a lot more relaxing.

Is having an immaculate house at all times really more important than spending time with your husband?

Just can't relax if house is a mess! Cleaner comes only once a week I live in a quite small flat which doesn't help it! How can I live the floors dirty when I have 1 year old that puts everything in his mouth?!

Think of his immune system- you're building it up (works for me!)

ok, so do floors, but leave something else. ...

About baby's immune system!! But the other day I left baby with DH, the floor was dirty .. Cleaner was in the way so I said to DH, look after him so I can have a quickly shower then DH came to this bath saying my baby was choking ... imagine ... I almost had a heart attack.. baby was fine as soon I got him!! Now I'm even crazier with floors!! I'm probably one of this miserables mum when subjects is housework!! Can't help myself ....

If it's a tiny flat there can't be much to clean so why do you have to do it all the time. Our cleaner comes for five hours a week and about every 18 months I have a scrubbers spring clean. Two teenagers now and work full time. Pulls eye quickly away from cobweb in cr of bedroom :). As a matter of routine and daily - wipe hob, wipe fridge handles, load and unload dishy and washy, tible or peg, do paperwork, cook dinner, make one pcked lunch, check communal bogs/basins for skids, drips and scum rings/too many splashes - feel mildly guilty that we don't live in a showcome. Get over it quickly otherwise I could make myself ill.

I am with clouds. If you are sacrificing time with your husband so you can mop or hoover everyday then you have a problem.