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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think they did this on purpose? PIL related

302 replies

Dannilion · 02/05/2013 16:01

Bit of background..

PIL's are shit with money. They have had failed business after failed business, declared themselves bankrupt, borrowed £££££'s from friends as investments, asked DH to launder money for them etc.

FIL is nice enough, just made some very silly decisions as well as being on the receiving end of some very bad luck. MIL are very different but get on on a surface level.

Anyways, a few months ago PIL's came round and asked if they could open a bank account in DH's name in order to receive their wages or something as due to their bankruptcy they were struggling with doing so. DH said no, as it was obviously illegal and he is also self employed and didn't want to be investigated. Also PFB was due and we were worried about the effect it would have on us when it came to claiming tax credits etc. Not that we should have had to have given a reason for not wanting to partake in this, but we had plenty.

Fast forward to them coming to visit the baby last week and bringing some letters for him that had arrived at their address. He gets the odd one every so often. He opens one and it's from Santander, thanking him for opening a new account. He never opened a new account with them, ever.

PIL's were very quick to say 'oh your father opened an account with them but they did it in the wrong name by accident, never mind all sorted now etc' and changed the subject.

I just can't see how a bank could open an account in the wrong name for someone who hasn't lived at that address in years. All his other mail comes here so if there is some sort of grand database it would had him at our home address surely?

I haven't broached this with DH yet as it would be devastating for him. But AIBU to think that they have probably gone ahead and opened a bank account in his name? Obviously if they have we will have to deal with it ASAP.

OP posts:

WafflyVersatile · 02/05/2013 22:17

At the very least you need to get credit checks from the 3 main agencies (I think you used to be able to do this online from one place for about £20) and you need to put a note on the credit record that DH does not live at his parents address. And then do regular checks as I think bank statements can be used for about 3 months as proof of address for other things.

/not a legal or finance expert]

Charlesroi · 02/05/2013 22:18

No, not possible to open an account with no ID. They'll run an e-check on the electoral roll and if the person doesn't appear at that address you'll have to produce even more paperwork to prove your address.

Total horseshit, I'm afraid.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii · 02/05/2013 22:30

Wow, what a awful situation.

I really feel for you.

My thieving bastard BIL has stolen 'used' money that was in his mums current account (my MIL) He has done this for years. Everyone knows about it but it would cause too much family upset if anyone actually dealt with it.

Deep down, i bet your DH knows the truth.

Callthemidlife · 02/05/2013 22:39

KYC (know your client) and Money laundering rules mean you need multiple ID to open an account. birth certificate, passport and utility bill are the standard docs they ask for generally to open an account (can supplement with things like driving licence, benefits ID, etc). Even if they have his details from an old account they have to run these checks fresh for a new account. I opened an account in my married name and had to do this, despite being with the same bank for 20 years (and having same personal manager for 5 years).

They are clearly lying. I would tell the parents that you are going in to bank to complain at their incompetence and will be seeking substantial compensation from the bank for their negligence as they have broken all their money laundering rules. Then sit back and wait for them to call back and come clean as they will realise they need to do this in order to try to stop things going out of their control.

What you do then, Christ knows. At least you can let yourself be indignant and apoplectic, your DH is going to have to process some far darker stuff. Good luck.

JerseySpud · 02/05/2013 22:41

To agree with the others, you can not open an account with no ID whatsoever and you also have to sign forms. Surely if she was cancelling the account they wouldn't have signed the forms?

olibeansmummy · 02/05/2013 22:44

So this lady at the bank 'accidentally' entered your dh's details instead of your fil's including name and dob, despite her having never met your dh and him not banking with Santander?! Hmmmm...

Original poster

Dannilion · 02/05/2013 22:53

DH agrees that we'll go alone together and ask the bank what the hell has happened and for a copy of the I.D used etc. I think he feels better about doing this as he hasn't got to be face to face with his parents when it all unfolds if that makes sense.

He has told the bank to close the account and that he didn't open it, but after being on hold to the fraud team for half an hour on a premium rate number he decided to just go in branch and sort it. Not what I would have done but hey.

I've watched him try to process this over in his head tonight and it's really saddening. He has said that if they have really done this then that would be the end of our relationship with them.

OP posts:

Christelle2207 · 02/05/2013 22:53

This smells very very bad.
However, I recently opened an account with Santander (online) and didn't have to produce ID or sign anything, to my surprise.
Not that that makes it ok, but certainly easy to do.
For fil to have applied with your dh's name, dob and address instead of fIL's by mistake ???? Never.

Maggie111 · 02/05/2013 22:53

FGS do the credit check!!!!!!

FairPhyllis · 02/05/2013 22:54

I really think you need to call the police tonight before PIL have an opportunity to do anything more.

You need to get it on record ASAP that you knew nothing about this. I would not put it past PIL to claim that your DH was an accomplice. They will quite happily fuck you over if you don't protect yourselves.

Christelle2207 · 02/05/2013 22:54

If it turns out as feared I would, in your situation, never want them in my house again.
Feel very sad for your dh.

SmellsLikeTeenStrop · 02/05/2013 22:57

I bank with a building society, when I opened a second account with that bank I didn't need to show any ID. Has your DH ever had an account with Santander or whatever it was before it turned in to Santander?

Christelle2207 · 02/05/2013 22:59

Smells
See my post, I didn't have to show any ID or sign anything and didn't have another account with Santander.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii · 02/05/2013 23:04

If this is a deliberate act by your In Laws it doesn't mean your DH has to end his relationship with them. If he did maintain contact it would just have to be done with the knowledge of what his parents have done. It would have to be under his terms.

If I were you though, I would not want to see them again.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii · 02/05/2013 23:07

Christelle2207. Did you already have an account with Santander before opening your online account? I would be curious to know what type of account it was?

CSIJanner · 02/05/2013 23:10

Dannilion please do the credit checks in *all of your names. It might be important. And when I say all, I mean your husband, yourself and your baby.

And ask to see the new account application to see if it had been signed.

BelleJolie · 02/05/2013 23:13

MIL is lying and her story has so many obvious holes it's actually astonishing she thinks it's credible. How on earth would your DH's name even come into it when FIL is opening a bank account?? It doesn't make sense! What, were they just chatting about their son to make small talk and did the teller then just somehow put it on the application form...? Along with his DOB? Bollocks.

I'm sorry, though. It's going to be very hard for your DH to face up to this one because it is a huge breach of trust. They clearly have no regard towards their son and his new family and the potential situation they are putting you all in. Utterly shameful of them.

It needs to be dealt with in order for you both to protect yourselves.

Christelle2207 · 02/05/2013 23:23

I opened a standard "123" current account jointly with dh and at no point did I have to show Id, nor did he. Never been to a branch. No other accounts with Santander.
However I may have entered NI number which would have checked that names and addresses matched- I recall something about having to send in ID if our details couldn't be "verified" but they were ok.

KenAdams · 02/05/2013 23:25

that's insane! Utter cheek! I'd be fuming too.

CoolaSchmoola · 02/05/2013 23:40

As awful as this is I'm glad for you that you found out now.

We found out when we put ourselves on the electoral roll after living overseas for a year....

Except we didn't get a bank letter, we got DEBT COLLECTORS for various credit card companies looking to collect eight and a half grand DH apparently borrowed whilst living at his mother's - except he hadn't lived there for years.

Sorting it out was hugely stressful, every time we thought it was dealt with up popped yet another creditor. It went on for over a year and ended up with him disassociating himself from his parents.

I couldn't believe anyone could do this to their kids, but they do.

MidniteScribbler · 02/05/2013 23:45

Quite frankly I think that ending this relationship would be better in the long run. Anyone that could do this is not someone I would want as an influence in my child's life. They need to learn that their are consequences for their actions, which may include criminal charges. They really are the worms that infest the dog shite that is on the shoes of the lowest of the low.

MrsPoglesWood · 02/05/2013 23:50

What everyone else says. Please do credit checks as there may be other accounts you know nothing about.

For Experian you have to enter card details but the first 30 days are free. You can cancel before they start charging. I did, wasn't a problem.

Cravey · 03/05/2013 00:00

Your husband needs to make an appt with the bank concerned go in and ask to see all paperwork etc that refers to him. Once this have been done he needs to ask the bank to call the police although he may find they have already done so. He needs to do this ASAP in order for it to be seen that he is not a part of this. It's fraud pure and simple and the last thing you need is for him to be dragged into it in terms of being complicit.

K8Middleton · 03/05/2013 00:02

I used to work for Santander and dh still does. This is my advice:

Do not go to the branch.
Your dh should deal directly with the fraud department and tell them everything he knows and get them to deal with it and closing the account down.
Do not ask for copies of ID seen etc at this stage (they are not allowed to keep that at the branch so no point and also, although you have been defrauded there may be more to it, so let the investigation run first)
Do not go to the police yet
Do not touch a penny of any money that comes into the account
Ask the fraud department for written confirmation that the account has been closed, that it was opened fraudulently and the action that has been taken to protect his credit rating.
Contact Equifax, Experian and the other credit reference agency I forget the name of and ask them to place a caution on file due to identity theft.

You are unlikely to get any compensation from Santander if they were not at fault (if they followed anti-money laundering procedures, took all reasonable precautions and immediately put right the problem as soon as they were made aware) and if there are no damages. It is quite possible they are the victim in this too and I'm no great fan of Santander so it pains me to have to stick up for them... even with caveats.

Do not deal with the branch. This will either inflame the situation or, more likely, just hold things up. There is also the possibilty that the person who opened the account was involved in the fraud and you do not want to tip them off.

Fraud will liaise with the police and give advice. Let them sort out the financial stuff and once you have all the information (independently verified - do not trust pil) you can decide what to about pil.

Think carefully about going to the police. At the moment you don't know what happened. Once you do know you may need to make that decision and consider all the wider implications. You don't need to do that yet.

Regarding identification for account opening they use electronic identification which checks things like dob and other personal info to electoral records, credit reference agency info and other databases. If you doesn't pass that then you have to provide proof of identity and address. All new customers must be verified (ie is that person in front of you the person they claim to be?) using preferably photo ID (usually passport/driving licence) or signature (credit/debit card for example). They should be checking things like dob, sex and other stuff matches too.

It used to be the case that branches should not must not open accounts for people not physically present (can't ask dh he's asleep) so the wrong dob is ringing alarm bells for me and is another reason to stay the hell away from the employee who opened the account. If it happened as mil says the employee is either negligent or involved. Or mil's lying.

K8Middleton · 03/05/2013 00:10

There should be a 24 hr fraud number that's 01908 (Milton Keynes). They should also ca you back if you ask.

I can ask dh tomorrow but it used to be 01908 237 963 can't remember what I did yesterday but can remember that from years ago

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