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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - No sweets or squash

443 replies

mamab30 · 29/04/2013 13:16

AIBU to not serve squash or give out sweets at a children's party?

Just wondering what parents would think of going to a children's party where there was only water to drink and just birthday cake to take home. For us that would be normal and I wouldn't think anything of it but just wondering if parents would be surprised at not seeing squash or sweets?

OP posts:
MummaBubba123 · 30/04/2013 05:49

Personally, I'd love it ad my children don't eat all that cramp, anyway. Oooooh- controversial!
It's one of my pet peeves: we know so much about health and healthy eating, yet continue to pour total shot down the gullets of those we love. Not referring to squash here. Just having a general rant.
I wanted my children's parties to be ones where they didn't need to avoid anything but had all of their favourite healthy snacks on the table!
Humous
Crudités
Tomatoes
Pitta bread
Mini cheeses
etc.
And individual fairy cakes
I even made sugar free banana and raisin bread cake (tasted like fruit cake) in the shape of a train for a few years.
Tbh, the children were entertainer and didn't seem to care. Quite a few of the mums appreciated the healthy food offered.

MummaBubba123 · 30/04/2013 05:51

I bought water - I had individual juice cartons in apple or orange in case anyone preferred it

MummaBubba123 · 30/04/2013 05:52

Your party
Your kids
Who cares
Enjoy and don't worry about it.
I if Little Tommy refuses to go next year because sweets weren't supplied - and his mum can't talk to him about it, best they don't!

Theironfistofarkus · 30/04/2013 06:11

Parties in my view are about being a good hostess and ensuring people enjoy themselves and the food and drink on offer. As an adult, part of that would be to offer alcohol (unless the host had a religious reason not to do so or eg had alcohol problems) as that is what the guests would want or expect. Even if i was pregnant and not drinking i would offer alcohol. In a kids party I would offer juice as that is what my guests would want or expect. I would also offer some kind of sweet treat for dessert. Does not have to be sweets - ice cream or cookies or cup cakes would do. The thing is that at a celebration, people expect treats.

As an aside, my son sees a paediatrician from time to time. His view is that children need fat and so chocolate etc from time to time is fine (so long as they brush their teeth). But then my DC are skinny!

sleepywombat · 30/04/2013 07:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

forevergreek · 30/04/2013 07:12

I do think it's funny when I hear people say 'well children need fat', or 'my skinny child needs fats', so I have to buy crisps/ choc etc..

..erm no you don't. Yes they need healthy fats, not crap ones. They will get more in some plain Greek yogurt, a handful of nuts, some avocado, a cheesy sauce etc etc.

Theironfistofarkus · 30/04/2013 07:33

Of course those are all better ways to get fat forever. But when they are super skinny and are satiated with that the medical advice I was given by a paed and a nutritionist separately is that the added fat in chocolate, ice cream etc is good if they will eat it. As I said though my Dc are underweight and it is a real struggle to get them to gain weight.

I can't tell you how stressful it can be to have kids who don't gain weight

Toadinthehole · 30/04/2013 08:21

In the colonies here (formerly UK)

No squash at our children's birthday parties. Hasn't stopped anyone coming back the following year.

We have always had a cake though (and I don't mean a lentil cake). It's not unusual.

Feeling obliged to feed your children a shedload of sweetened shite is, I think, a British thing.

SuiGeneris · 30/04/2013 09:28

Jewcy: you should perhaps check the meaning of the words you intend to use before typing them. How can a party bag filling be "vainglorious"?

For the rest, splutter all you like. Happily I do not think you will ever have to suffer my parties IRL.

miemohrs · 30/04/2013 10:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 10:37

I even made sugar free banana and raisin bread cake (tasted like fruit cake) in the shape of a train for a few years.

There. Are. No. Words.

DaveMccave · 30/04/2013 10:38

I'd find it refreshing. Over the years I've had to accept chemical squash and junk food offered at parties because past a certain age you can't single yours out at a party. I hate that people only
Offer aspartame filled cheap squash/cup drinks though. I've always offered fresh orange or apple juice. I have put out some biscuits and cake but lots and lots of fruit too, and the fruit is always very popular.

Barbecue is great, fruit kebabs maybe? If you don't want to spend a fortune on fruit juice, you could make different flavoured fresh fruit juice ice cubes for them to put in their water, with straws. They'd love that. Or make a big fruit cocktail with lots of ice.

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 10:44

SuiGeneris, Vainglorious means 'excessive pride in oneself'.

This: ...only put a single Lindor in the party bags. Other parents have commented favourably is vainglory of the highest order and smug

I am, however, utterly devastated that I will never attend one of your wakes parties Grin

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 10:46

I if Little Tommy refuses to go next year because sweets weren't supplied - and his mum can't talk to him about it, best they don't!

...but what if he's called Tarquin and mummy is on the board of governors?

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 10:49

I am a [recovering] sugar addict

Wow. You would never have guessed.

SunsetMojito · 30/04/2013 10:57

I'd think you took life a bit too seriously.

seriouscakeeater · 30/04/2013 11:04

Lmao jewcy But to be fair quite surprised that a Ferrero Rocher wasn't used but are they naff nowdays???

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 11:16

serious, those sorts of women wouldn't be seen dead near a Ferrero Rocher. A Ferrari, maybe Wink

noblegiraffe · 30/04/2013 11:17

Do you know that for the price of a single Lindor you could have bought a whole bag of proper sweets?

Jewcy · 30/04/2013 11:23

Noble Grin

seriouscakeeater · 30/04/2013 11:24

[Shock] There is all ways place in my life for a Ferrero Rocher , especially at Christmas when I get treated to the white ones too! The joys!!

pigletmania · 30/04/2013 11:25

Yabvvu not to serve squash, some kids just do not drink just water, I don't I lik a bt of flavour to my drink. Serve fresh juice

Casualty · 30/04/2013 11:37

Don't forget Ferrero Rocher contain nuts Wink

TigOldBitties · 30/04/2013 11:38

I wouldn't be upset but I would think you and all of a similar ilk to be a bit stingy and dull, but I'd just take them out for tea afterwards, then give them free reign of our yummy cupboard. The DC are allowed whatever they want of a weekend.

My 3 youngest DC are vegetarian and don't really drink water on its own by choice, as its a party I'd think that a tad unfair.

Didn't realise there was anything wrong with squash anyway. I've never been to a party without squash and never to a party for the over 3's without fizzy drinks.

Your house your choice, but as you asked if parents would be surprised, then yes I would be.

Also the comment about diabetes, I'm presuming you meant type 2. My DH has diabetes (type 1) and thinks the DC should enjoy as much food while they still can, I certainly don't think its a stick you can use to beat people into complying with your views.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii · 30/04/2013 11:38

YANBU
You can give the kids whatever you want as long as you offer the parents coffee or wine