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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be exhausted by constant competetiveness from some people?

71 replies

superstarheartbreaker · 25/04/2013 19:04

Ok I am not anti-competetion and I think that a proper 1st, 2nd and 3rd is good but it is the petty one-upmanship between everday folk that gets to me:
Competetive parenting, gardening, homeownership, smugness, bullying, competetive misery, bitchyness, wieght-loss gain, clothes labels etc. Everyone just STOOOOOOOOP!
Can't stop the course of human nature I guess but OMG sometimes it just gets a bit wearing.

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 25/04/2013 19:05

I think I may be more exhausted by this than you are, actually. ;-)

Sparklingbrook · 25/04/2013 19:07

I think I have become immune to it as I got older TBH. Grin CBA.

Original poster
superstarheartbreaker · 25/04/2013 19:07

I would like to add workplace politics and trolling to teh list of competetive pursuits.

OP posts:
nenevomito · 25/04/2013 19:08

I'd reply in detail, but since I'm better at you than everything, it would just upset you.

5318008 · 25/04/2013 19:09

Ahahaha notquite, v good

Sparklingbrook · 25/04/2013 19:09

The clothes labels mean nothing to me. I wouldn't spot anything designer. Plus cars. They all look the same to me-I have no idea what is a 'good' car.

deepfriedsage · 25/04/2013 19:10

I pity the showoff competative people.

Chottie · 25/04/2013 19:12

Thank goodness someone else is feeling the same about all this competitiveness - budge up on the sofa :)

I loathe and detest it in any shape or form. My tolerance level is going down. I think I might turn into one of these old ladies who speaks her mind

YouDontWinFriendsWithSalad · 25/04/2013 19:13

I usually say something anti-competitive that is so shocking the person doesn't want to engage with me.

"Look at my new amazing designer shoes!"
"They're nice. Look at mine - I stole them from a nursing home!"

"I built a miniature Eiffel Tower with DD using toothpicks, it was such an amazing bonding experience."
"Good for you! I'm usually too drunk to play with my DC!"

OneFingerSjupesUpTheYoni · 25/04/2013 19:27

youdontwin i just guffawed at nursing home shoes Blush

I tend to ignore competitive parents because they are still not as fabulous as me haha it screams of insecurity to keep banging on.

I burst with pride when the kids do something well/for the first time especially ds as he is just lovely Grin but after the initial 'yey' i don't need to rub it in every other parents face!

quesadilla · 25/04/2013 21:13

Obvious competitive parenting I treat with the contempt it deserves. But there is a fair amount of very stealthy competitive parenting which I find hard to deal with such as one I had the other day: "has dd started classes in (her dad's first language)? Our two have started learning xxx." The response this ridiculous stealth boast deserved: "she is two, ffs" seemed a little harsh for a friend.
It's when it's couched as a question or as concern that its tricky... Harder to be aggressive about it.

SingingSands · 25/04/2013 21:20

I work with a girl so competitive that I come home drained every day. Everything is a competition to her. It backfired on her recently though because she got into an argument with a colleague about who had the biggest head, which she won, and then realised that it wasn't really a victory!

Love the "nursing home" shoes comment!

DomesticCEO · 25/04/2013 21:23

I had a friend like this once - she competed over everything including who had the prettiest cat (WTF???) and the most active sex life (constant boasting and way too much information!).

It came to a head when she got pg with twins four months after I got pg with DS1 - she competed on who was having the most babies/hardest pg/most exciting pg, etc.

Dropped her after that. Angry

MostPeopleAreMad · 25/04/2013 21:34

I have the prettiest cat. So there.
Not that I'm competitive or anything Wink

MagicHouse · 25/04/2013 21:40

I find this exhausting too! I usually just respond with something nice like "yes, your new designer shoes/ bag/ promotion/ house/ car/ holiday home/ boat is lovely :-D" and change the subject.

doritosmonster · 25/04/2013 21:42

I am laughing loudly at nursing home shoes, being too drunk to play with the kids, and the prettiest cat!

I've known a few uber competitive people and they really annoy me. Someone on a forum I go on is very competitive. Every post is about how much money she has, and everything she buys has to be the most expensive. It's boring.

Sparklingbrook · 25/04/2013 22:18

No MostPeople it's me that has the prettiest cat. Wink Pic on profile-where is your pic? Grin

FoundAChopinLizt · 25/04/2013 22:23

Yes, I fight back the urge to say in response to those people

'well, yeah, my dad's bigger than your dad and he earns a squillion pounds-so there!'

In Rick Mayall style.

Sparklingbrook · 25/04/2013 22:24

Or 'considerably richer than yow' Harry Enfield stylee. Grin

Cherriesarelovely · 25/04/2013 22:25

Oh I know what you mean!! Years ago I distanced myself from a friend who did this constantly. After several years we are back in touch and I'm hoping he has changed a bit, it was so wearing!!

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 25/04/2013 22:26

DH had a work colleague who was relentlessly competitive. I just think that deep down these people are not very happy, satisfied, centred. So it doesn't really annoy me.

HesterShaw · 25/04/2013 22:28

Don't join in then!

HesterShaw · 25/04/2013 22:29

Or maybe I don't know any

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 25/04/2013 22:31

I have a theory that Cornwall is the least competitive place in the country.

I've found No one gives a shiny shit about designer shoes or new cars, I've found. It's very refreshing.

my county is better than your county Grin

Sparklingbrook · 25/04/2013 22:31

I don't think I do at the moment Hester. I haven't been boasted at lately at all. Confused Everyone has been lovely. Perhaps they are boasting behind my back.