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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think you are a very silly person indeed (or a teenager) if you have 900+ facebook friends?

52 replies

MintyyAeroEgg · 21/04/2013 22:40

OP posts:

BIWI · 21/04/2013 22:42

BIWI · 21/04/2013 22:43

Phew. I only have 261 friends.

mumandboys123 · 21/04/2013 22:44

depends how long you've lived, where you've worked, the state of your social life, how well travelled you are...I don't have anywhere near that but as an older person who (shock horror) didn't grow up with the Internet, email and social networking, I have lost contact with an awful lot of people who I know today would be 'Facebook Friends' in the most modern of circumstances. I don't search for people I have 'lost' (I have a life, mainly, but lots of people marry, change names, work in professions where they would rather clients couldn't see them etc etc etc.) but occassionally I accept a friend invite from someone I haven't seen in 15 years. All good.

So, in my opinion you are being entirely unreasonable unless you know that the person concerned has never been to school, never had any friends, has no family and has never left the house.

Original poster

MintyyAeroEgg · 21/04/2013 22:44

That's ok then!

OP posts:

McNewPants2013 · 21/04/2013 22:46

I have 419

WorraLiberty · 21/04/2013 22:47

Funny you should say that.

I was looking at FB this morning and saw one person (not a friend of mine) who has 4,577 friends

Original poster

MintyyAeroEgg · 21/04/2013 22:48

I'm not sure I've ever met 4,000 + people! Let alone wanted to share my musings and ramblings with them.

OP posts:

MeVsMadonnaVsElvis · 21/04/2013 22:52

I have 400ish. I don't care about the number at all - every single one of those people is someone I have met in real life - friends, family, work, school, travel etc.

Some people will add loads of random people and if that's what they want then cool I wouldn't judge or think of them as silly.

YABU.

BloggingAboutTediousThings · 21/04/2013 22:53

I have 603 friends, I all know them personally. A large part of my friends is from when I was younger and used to compete in showjumping, boarding school, university and I also lived in many cities and travel a lot. I have them in 'lists' and restrict accordingly who can see what.

CloudsAndTrees · 21/04/2013 22:57

People use Facebook in different ways. I know everyone on mine and that's the way I like it, but there's nothing wrong with using the Internet to connect with people you've never met. Isn't that what we all do on MN?

BIWI · 21/04/2013 22:57

A large proportion of mine are MNetters. It stems from when we were all trying to work out what FB was all about, so loads of us added loads of MNetters as friends.

Over the years I have deleted some of them, but there are still many who I have never met but who I feel I have got to know through their status updates.

Bunbaker · 21/04/2013 22:59

There is a girl in DD's year at school (year 8) who has about 1500 FB friends. I don't believe that she knows each one personally. I just think she is rather needy and wants to look popular.

I have about 15 FB friends, mainly because I just CBA with Facebook and never make the effort to befriend people. I don't really "do" social networking. I admit to being sceptical about people who are "friends" with several hundred people.

ajandjjmum · 21/04/2013 22:59

I agree it can be a joke. DD has someone who is a FB friend, and I happen to know her Mum. We met in town randomly when DD was around 14, and when we left I asked why she didn't talk to , and she said she didn't know her! She was young enough (and stupid enough!!) then to add friends of friends, but hopefully has matured a little now.

Original poster

MintyyAeroEgg · 21/04/2013 23:03

I think Facebook is different to Mumsnet, Clouds & Trees.

When I first joined fb I took it literally, and thought Friends actually meant Friends.

I know now that it doesn't, to everyone, but still!

I have friend requests from, for eg., my cousin's 27 year old daughter, whom I have met once. I haven't accepted because ... why would I?

OP posts:

McNewPants2013 · 21/04/2013 23:07

I only put my statues that i would happy say in conversation in public.

InLoveWithDavidTennant · 21/04/2013 23:07

there are people that add others for games and whatnot too

i used to have over 700 (back when i had no life) but im now down to 246 i think. some of those who i have never met have become better friends to me than my rl friends.

an 8 year old with that many friends? whats the point? and why is she on fb in the first place

SwedishEdith · 21/04/2013 23:14

As someone with about 2 Friends, I think some people Americans do genuinely use it for real networking. I can almost imagine that they add you as they meet you. However, just because I've met someone doesn't mean I actually want to have any further contact with them though, however I know them.

BackforGood · 21/04/2013 23:17

ILWDT Yr8, is a 12 or 13 yr old,

I can see that it would be easy to get up to many hundred friends. My teenage ds meets loads of people through things he's been involved with over the last few years, and then others he's at school with, or used to be a school with. He's probably near the number you say - but they are all people he knows from RL.
I think teens think differently from those of us who didn't grow up with the internet - it was a lot harder to stay in touch when it meant getting round to writing letters.

WTFisABooyhoo · 21/04/2013 23:18

i have 95. intentionally. people piss me off.

manicinsomniac · 21/04/2013 23:22

I think it depends on your age and how often you clean up your list.

I have around 700 because I was still at university when I first got facebook in the days when you could only join if you had an academic email address. So I actually did know hundreds of people then.

And obviously I've met an awful lot of people since. But I've never got round to deleting anybody.

StrawberryTot · 21/04/2013 23:29

FB is used for all sorts of reasons, my partner has just short of 2000 friends and is neither a very silly person or a teenager, he's just a guy who runs a business to provide for his family so I'd say YAdefinitelyBU.

CuttedUpPear · 21/04/2013 23:35

I have 1,205.

What do you say to that? Am I a silly person?

I work in the events industry and I'm freelance. Every job I do I end up with more contacts on my phone and in my email, and soem more FB 'friends'. There is never a good time to go through and delete people, and anyway I quite often work with them or their colleagues again within a few years.

I use it as a networking tool.

SwedishEdith · 21/04/2013 23:38

I know of someone with 5000+ friends. I'm tempted to invite them just to see if they actually check who they add

CloudsAndTrees · 21/04/2013 23:46

MN and fb are different Minty, but only to a certain extent. There's no right or wrong, people can use the same website for more than one thing. You don't get moral superiority points for only having good friends and family on your completely unimportant list of Facebook friends.

People use these websites in different ways, that's all.

GoblinGranny · 21/04/2013 23:56

I have.....

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