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AIBU?

to laugh about my children's zoo trauma?

62 replies

pointythings · 15/04/2013 18:33

Were at the zoo today (non-pupil day here in Suffolk and lovely weather) and ended up walking past the zebra enclosure to find the zebras seriously at it. They watched in horror all the way to the end and ever since I have heard nothing but 1)grossed out comments about zebra sex, 2) questions about whether other animals do it in the same way (including whales Confused) and 3) the stated intention never, ever to have sex.

I am being unreasonable to find it all utterly hilarious, aren't I?

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HollyBerryBush · 15/04/2013 18:35

I'm going to have to google, as whales suckle their young, where do they keep their nipples?

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LaurieFairyCake · 15/04/2013 18:36

Grin

What a great introduction to sex - are zebras hung like horses? Cos I assumed men had 20 inch cocks after I saw a stallion Hmm

Fucking disappointment seeing a mans Grin

No idea where I thought I was going to put it .....

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flossieraptor · 15/04/2013 18:36

You should have told them it was a giant crossword Grin

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livinginwonderland · 15/04/2013 18:39

hahah, brilliant! which zoo was it?

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crazydrunkevilyoni · 15/04/2013 18:39

flossie Grin

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PiggyPlumPie · 15/04/2013 18:43

NU at all!! I still remember fondly taking my then 3 yo niece to Chester Zoo where we saw the elephants at it. Grin

All of the elephants bar one charged at the lone lady and she didn't stand much of a chance!

And is was like a fifth leg, it was mahoosive!! Grin Grin Grin

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pointythings · 15/04/2013 18:43

Laurie we have established that zebras are indeed hung like horses - when I pointed out that was where the saying came from, I got more hilarious disgust...

living it was Banham in Norfolk.

Holly we were not thinking about whale nipples, more about whale penises, and I think we established that they don't do it doggy style Grin. I told them a blue whale penis was 6 ft long, I've just looked it up and it's 8 to 10 feet Shock Grin.

'Twas a fabulous afternoon.

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HollyBerryBush · 15/04/2013 18:44

I went to Colchester Zoo - they had a monkey, masterbating frantically at all the teenage girls. Never doing that school trip again.

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livinginwonderland · 15/04/2013 18:52

by the way, i didn't ask that so i could go and see zebras having sex, i promise.

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CharlieUniformNovemberTango · 15/04/2013 19:02

We went to a petting zoo the other day and DS announced gleefully that the birds were doing piggy backs much to the amusement of everyone around.

DD come over to see, stopped dead in her tracks with wide eyed disgust and promptly turned on her heels to blush soemehere else :o

We saw camels doing it at blair drummond once. But she was younger and only remembers the elephants pooing from that trip. I was surprised that the all crowded in a circle around the performing pair. I don't think I could do it with an audience :)

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phantomnamechanger · 15/04/2013 19:17

We have had (in the car) "mummy, in that garden there was a dog giving another dog a piggy back" and at the zoo "whats that swishy thing dangling there" (elephant penis, unmissable!) - and the lovely young gorillas deliberately crapping on their hands and eating it to entertain the shreiking kids.
LOL

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helenthemadex · 15/04/2013 19:21

is this like dogging, just with animals instead?

YANBU at all

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Still18atheart · 15/04/2013 19:23

Reminds me of the time when as a young teenager went on a school trip to a zoo. The amount of giggling that happened over some meerkats having sex Grin

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Theala · 15/04/2013 19:28

i got a fit of the giggles when i saw some pigs having sex once when i was with my parents. i was 36 at the time. Blush

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CaptainKirksNipples · 15/04/2013 19:29

We watched the otters at it last weekend at the farm park. They are quite acrobatic, lots of rolling and weird positions then a few seconds of very fast humping!

Then in the next enclosure a marmoset was riding on the back of a tortoise and kids wanted to know if they were making babies too!Grin

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pointythings · 15/04/2013 19:31

Grin at marmoset possibly shagging turtle - they'd be interesting babies, though!

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LagomOchLyckaSwede · 15/04/2013 19:35

We saw flying squirrels going at it.

Quite disturbing actually as, due to the skin stretching to the ends of the arms from around the stomach area, the female as completely hidden and we only realised what was happening when the female popped her head out.

Also seen a chimp apparently masturbating Hmm

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HoneyDragon · 15/04/2013 19:41

We went to a farm when I was heavily pg with dd. In our case it was a couple of alpacas.

Ds enquiried as to what they were doing.

Having sex was my cheery reply as at 6 Ds had already had the basics explained.

He turned to me with eyes wide with horror and said "Wow! Did Daddy not really hurt your back when he did that to you? He's much bigger than you!" Blush

We nearly killed the senior gentleman behind us, and his wife. He was laughing so hard he went for a sit down Blush

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HoneyDragon · 15/04/2013 19:43

Theala Grin

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peeriebear · 15/04/2013 19:45

Many years ago on a trip to Colchester zoo, one of the chimps was weeing in a plastic bottle Hmm
LOL Honeydragon :o

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ChunkyPickle · 15/04/2013 19:49

Awww, brings back memories of the chimpanzees at the zoo we went to when I was a kid. Expert aims with all bodily fluids (luckily my dad knew them from old and told us to stand back - other visitors got covered in pee and worse..)

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LagomOchLyckaSwede · 15/04/2013 19:53

Ooh, I saw a chimp do that in Colchester! I love Colchester Zoo, then and now (we live in Essex but I have to work away a lot for my company) and we love the aardvark burrow and the familiar friends bit (because you can touch and feed the animals) and suricata sands.

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Herhonesty · 15/04/2013 19:54

Same thing happened to us at marwell with tigers. Luckily dd aged 2 didn't blink an eyelid but me and dh were killing ourselvesSmile

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pointythings · 15/04/2013 20:07

I had fun explaining to DDs that humans got to do it in lots of different positions, unlike animals... This in the middle of waiting for the bird of prey display. Shame I didn't get to quote the Eddie Izzard 'Methods of Procreation' sketch at them...

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facedontfit · 15/04/2013 20:23

Of course it's hilarious. At a fete a young boy, 3ish, looking at an enormous pair of pigs testicles asked his father, "What are they?" I added to fathers embarrassment by also asking, "Yes, what are they?"
Grin

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