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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this was rude of my partner or was I just being annoying?

76 replies

RoxanneRedLight · 15/04/2013 12:40

My partner was on the phone to work Friday afternoon, when I realised that he had a doctors appointment on Monday morning (booked a couple of weeks ago) and wasn't sure whether he'd let them know or not that he would need time off work.

Because it was Friday afternoon and getting late the office would be closed during the weekend so it might be too late to say anything if he'd forgotten.

I walked up to him and he shooed me away with his hand and then i quickly said "just wanted to say don't forget about your GP appointment."

To which he said "I know" and then mouthed fuck off at me.

I know it's annoying to have someone interrupt you when you're on the phone, but I wasn't interrupting him to ask him what he wanted for dinner, I was only doing it for his benefit.

Aibu?

OP posts:
Pootles2010 · 15/04/2013 12:41

Doesn't matter if you're being annoying, you should never be spoken to like that.

Did he apologise?

Passmethecrisps · 15/04/2013 12:43

I would be really shocked if my DH told me to fuck off. That's really unnecessary. Would he tell a colleague to fuck off?

I have no idea if you were being annoying but he was certainly very rude.

CajaDeLaMemoria · 15/04/2013 12:44

Erm...

Well, it's not nice to tell someone to Fuck off,but equally it's rather annoying to be listening to someone in a work call and have someone else talk to you too. You haven't got a hope of listening to both people.

I'd probably have given him a look and been a bit annoyed when he came off the phone, but got over it quite quickly. It seems late to be annoyed at this now.

MerryMarigold · 15/04/2013 12:44

Agree with pootles. If he does say that to you (or anyone) on a regular basis you need to wash his mouth out with soap!

MerryMarigold · 15/04/2013 12:44

On the other hand, if it is commonly used in your family/ friends then it wasn't U of him.

TheYoniKeeper · 15/04/2013 12:45

WHAT [shocked]

There was no need for that...(Plenty of alternatives available that aren't nasty, even if you do feel like saying fuck off).

Is that a one off? Or does he disrespect you in other ways?

Has you pulled him up on it? Has he apologized?

livinginwonderland · 15/04/2013 12:46

well, you shouldn't have interrupted him, but he shouldn't have told you to fuck off either. i assume he was trying to concentrate and found you pretty irritating, though.

TheYoniKeeper · 15/04/2013 12:46

(but I also just don't swear at other adults out of the blue...If you both do it regularly then it's a different kettle of fish)

LilyAmaryllis · 15/04/2013 12:47

He's rude and you were annoying. Especially when he's on the phone to work! My kids do this to me, and I am forever telling them NOT TO TALK TO ME WHEN I'M ON THE PHONE! I don't think it should be too hard.

TheYoniKeeper · 15/04/2013 12:47

Yes, it's irritating but it's a bit OTT considering. He could've said plenty of other things or just shooed her away Hmm

TheYoniKeeper · 15/04/2013 12:48

And she was trying to help him out.

If he realized this after and they made up then fine.

seeker · 15/04/2013 12:49

Doesn't matter what you did- it is unacceptable to tell another person to fuck off.

I might have put a note under his nose rather than talking to him, but regardless, his behaviour was unacceptable.

SoupDragon · 15/04/2013 12:49

Both - he was rude, you were annoying. Actually, you were rude too because you interrupted him on the phone.

RoxanneRedLight · 15/04/2013 12:49

But like I said I wasn't interrupting him to have a conversation about my day.

I literally said one sentence, and it was his benefit. The office would have been closed and they would have been pissed off if he's told them on Monday morning.

OP posts:
peeriebear · 15/04/2013 12:51

But if he had forgotten, and would have had to either tell them while he was on the phone or call them back again, she was doing something helpful! If my DH said that to me- oh wait, he wouldn't, because he's not an arse.

Fairylea · 15/04/2013 12:52

I don't think you should have reminded him... if he gets in trouble on Monday that's his fault isn't it? Surely he's not a teenager who needs telling what to do!!?

That said, he was wrong to speak to you like that.

bran · 15/04/2013 12:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

miemohrs · 15/04/2013 12:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MerryMarigold · 15/04/2013 12:59

OP, you haven't clarified whether you quite often say it to each other, either jokingly or out of irritation.

HandMini · 15/04/2013 13:02

I'd have told him after the call. He could always have rung back.

It is irritating to be spoken to while on the phone.

The fuck off depends on your usual style of speech. DP and I would as that to one another ocasionally so in our life, not unreasonable.

whokilleddannylatimer · 15/04/2013 13:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CinnabarRed · 15/04/2013 13:10

What HandMini said.

Owllady · 15/04/2013 13:14

I have to say this would cause an argument in opur house, dh hates me being his mother so to speak

comedycentral · 15/04/2013 13:17

YANBU...what happened next?

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 15/04/2013 13:18

It would drive me mad to be interrupted on the phone to be reminded about my own doctor's appointment. Sort of thing my mother would do. Sorry OP - he shouldn't have told you fuck off though.

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