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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To try and get a sick note???

34 replies

pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:23

I work in a small shop with 5 other people. Our boss is one of the most vicious people i have ever come across. She bullies everyone, especially me. It comes to the point where i am sobbing on a sunday night knowing she is going to make my week hell.

I have started to loose hair through the stress, i'm a bag of nerves constantly. I just don't know what to do!

I can't just leave, i have a family to support.

Would i bu to go on the sick and leave my work mates in the lurch?

I know there all on edge too. Please help me. x

OP posts:
Finola1step · 14/04/2013 22:28

I know you have a family to support but... No job is worth making you so stressed that you are losing your hair!

How soon can you start looking for another job?

andubelievedthat · 14/04/2013 22:28

you are stressed and then some , go to your doctor and get signed off, then see cab,good luck ,and staffing levels are not your concern, put those thoughts out your mind and concentrate on you/your family.

BabylonReturns · 14/04/2013 22:30

Are you a union member at all?

Does your boss have a boss higher up?

If you are genuinely suffering work related stress, YANBU to take sometime off, however is this likely to make returning to work worse or harder?

Can the five of you not tackle your boss together?

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:32

I have been looking for another job for awhile. I have sent off hundreds of applications.

I'm actually scared of my boss, how sad is that. She has put her hands on me a few times, to move me out of the way. She likes to throw stuff at me too x

OP posts:
chocolatespiders · 14/04/2013 22:32

You need to all take action towards her.. In the mean time I think you should get signed off. sounds awful

AgentZigzag · 14/04/2013 22:33

If losing hair through her treatment of you isn't being ill, then what is?

Yes, get signed off and start looking for something else (easier said than done I know).

Your work mates will understand, especially if this boss bullies them as well.

Who's your boss' boss? Can you go to them?

If she's the owner of the shop, she still shouldn't be able to get away with treating you like shit, maybe another poster knows who you should go to to get advice if that's the case? Citizens Advice?

Jinsei · 14/04/2013 22:33

Thing is, going off sick won't make the problem go away, will it? Eventually you'll have to go back, and the bully will still be there. Does she own the shop herself, or is she an employee? If she owns it, then I'm afraid you need to start looking for another job. If she is an employee, can you put in a grievance to head office about her?

If it's genuinely making you ill, then you may well have to take some time off sick, but be aware that you'll still need to tackle the problem when you go back.

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:34

Babylon. She owns the business and the other staff members are terrified of her.
Were all mums who work here during school hours.

We have tried talking to her but we were fobbed off. We had the silent treatment for days and working there was horrendous.

OP posts:
CaptainSweatPants · 14/04/2013 22:35

Report her for assault?
Video her in action too

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:35

Another one of the girls is already on the sick through stress and my boss was fuming about it. She's so intimidating Sad

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 14/04/2013 22:36

' She has put her hands on me a few times, to move me out of the way. She likes to throw stuff at me too'

That is totally, totally shit and unacceptable.

Are there any witnesses? Can you get evidence of how she is.

I would try and turn round being scared of her into a fucking rage at how she dares to treat you like that!

She needs teaching a lesson by the sounds of it.

HollyBerryBush · 14/04/2013 22:36

1, join a union, all of you

2.. Is there CCTV? She put hands on you? That's assault, go to the police

3.. start looking for another job

NotYoMomma · 14/04/2013 22:37

I've just started a thread like this today. It's further down the page. It's awful being in a bad work environment xxx

AgentZigzag · 14/04/2013 22:37

'She needs teaching a lesson by the sounds of it.'

Down an industrial tribunal route I meant, rather than sending a couple of heavies round Grin

BriansBrain · 14/04/2013 22:37

Is it just one shop? Ha ha my auto correct made just one into justine Grin

You do not have to put up with this. A boss will have a boss but if it is an independent shop you have the upper hand of legislation on your side.

Horrible thing to deal with but you have the law on your side but you need the strength to deal with it.

HollyBerryBush · 14/04/2013 22:37

Although, this probably better over in Employment

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:39

You should see how she treats customers! I'm surprised she still has a business to be honest.

The thought of working with her tomorrow is making me want to cry, she is really that bad.

She even thinks it's acceptable to call me on my days off about work, she turns up at my house at 7am in the morning, on a sunday! at least twice a month because she has lost her shop keys.

My stomach is in knots ffs

OP posts:
nellyjelly · 14/04/2013 22:40

Join usdaw now.

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:40

usdaw? is that some sort of union?

OP posts:
HollyBerryBush · 14/04/2013 22:42

www.usdaw.org.uk/join.aspx

BabylonReturns · 14/04/2013 22:45

YANBU, doctor first thing. If not sooner.

You could take your sick note to her house at 6am on Tuesday. See how she likes it.

chocolatespiders · 14/04/2013 22:46

Really feel for you my stomach is in knots as dd 9 has been upset tonight as her 'friends' have told her she cant play with them tomorrow at school or after school.. bloody hate bullies.

Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:52

I'm going to see how she is in the morning, if she starts i'll have to do something.
She screams at me in front of customers! Arghhh i hate it, i just want to cry.
I'm the only one in the shop that cleans, because she makes me. Nobody else has to do it even though i am supervisor. I think she's trying to get me to leave to be honest.

OP posts:
Original poster
pedrohedges · 14/04/2013 22:53

I'm reading the Usdaw site right now x

OP posts:
Jinsei · 14/04/2013 23:00

She sounds awful OP. Try to document everything she does, as this sounds like tribunal territory to me. You will need evidence, and witnesses - sounds like the other staff and customers may be able to help.