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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that it's perfectly fine to be pleased someone is dead when they caused such a lot of harm?

503 replies

LoopaDaLoopa · 09/04/2013 09:43

So, all these people saying it is inappropriate to speak ill of the dead are all positive and nice about Pol Pot are they? Stalin? Hitler?

Just because someone dies does not make them a nice person.

And did you feel sorry for Saddam Hussain's family? Or did it not cross your mind?

OP posts:
Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:52

This soon you're being a twat HTH

I'm NOT a Tory but I've been doing the rounds on national media chatting about Thatcher and always been respectful and mentioned

  1. she saved uk economy

  2. labour's Harold Wilson shut down 3 x as many mines

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 20:53

Have just seen on tv a man of 60 ish saying his life was ruined when the steel factory he worked in was closed during Mrs Thatcher's Government cuts, as he has never worked since, and "she ruined his life".

Can anyone explain to me why a man in his early thirties could not have got a job at some point in the intervening three decades? From what I've read in the media, he is hardly the only one. I know quite a few people who have been made redundant in the last few years, and they have all eventually managed to find new jobs, although they found it hard.

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:54

MsBella - perhaps they should've voted then

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:55

I'm with you lessmiss

MsBella · 12/04/2013 20:55

Takingbackmonday... most travellers aren't on the electoral roll. And are you implying that just because they didn't vote they deserve their homes smashed up and lives ruined??! and even if they did vote it doesn't guarentee anything... what a ridiculous and cold hearted thing to say

Dawndonna · 12/04/2013 20:56

Good for you, Takingback

She didn't save the economy.
Wilson shut down different types of mines.
FFS, If you're out and about yapping on public media, try and get it right.
HTH.

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:58

She stopped subsidising unproductive parts of the economy. In 1984 she offered £800million investment into mining, alternative jobs or a voluntary redundancy package. Scargill, who still claimed to be a communist supporting the USSR in 2000 refused.

I'm from a mining family. My father was pragmatic, retrained.

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:59

And he's Donna she did save economy.

Manufacturing went up 7.5% under thatcher. I continued to rise 4.9% until 1997 when labour took over.

HTH

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 20:59

Yes* (iPad)

Takingbackmonday · 12/04/2013 21:01

Sorry msbella didn't see the traveller reference. However if you choose to live outside the law well you have no influence on it.

MsBella · 12/04/2013 21:04

Oops forgot I said anything else,
Hmm I don't agree at all what a thing to think

VerySmallSqueak · 12/04/2013 21:05

Really I think some people should remember what happened to the travellers in the 80's.
It wasn't just about protecting Stonehenge as a monument - it was about stopping a certain lifestyle.
MT said she was 'only too delighted to do anything we can to make life difficult for such things as hippy convoys'.
At the Beanfield travellers were beaten brutally by the police.In their midst were women who were pregnant or with babies.Their homes were totally trashed in many cases.

It was an absolute disgrace.

ReturnOfEmeraldGreen · 12/04/2013 21:11

Jesus H. Christ, how I hated that woman. Haven't they buried her yet?

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 21:11

I do think the feel-hard-done-by whingers get over-represented in the media. As I use the brand new sports facilities in my ex mining area, navigating around the new housing developments where nothing is built costing less than £400,000, usually more than £550,000, and remember how my grandfather got out of the mining industry asap and long before the pit closures, as did anyone with a bit of drive and motivation about them, I wonder who is driving the hard-done-by act other than politicians who want to get into power...because its certainly not reality.

unlucky83 · 12/04/2013 21:12

As I said - don't really remember what happened to travellers - they really had no notice to quit? Locally at least - the travellers seem to be doing fine now ...
Also not meaning to be rude to or pick on MsBella...just wound up by Mrs Thatcher 'ruined peoples lives' - people might not have liked her but if they haven't moved on in all this time they are more victims of BLairs nanny state than Thatcher - sitting waiting for someone to help them instead of helping themselves...
FGS she left power 20 years+ ago and we have have had a labour government for 13 years since ..who changed their name to New Labour to distance themselves from the Labour of the 70s (and 80s), who have not overturned any of her policies ..AND they widened the gap between rich and poor

She was without doubt a conviction politician..I don't think vindictive I think a realist.
The Unions (and Labour party) were absolutely needed but by the 70s/80s they were dictators - not elected by the majority - you had no choice but to be part of a union - stopping miners working who wanted to was what the police horse charges were all about - the NUM/Scargill robbed ALL the miners of any chance of there being a better outcome... and other trade unions did similar damage to other industries...
Also maybe they should vote/get on the electoral roll if they live in a democracy??? Or not complain about it ...
Even if it counts for nothing ...women died (and the working class had to fight for) for the right to vote!

BegoniaBampot · 12/04/2013 21:16

you realise that when steel works and mines were closed, whole areas had no jobs, the jobs weren't replaced. there were hundreds applying for one job. I moved south and had two jobs offered in one day. people's insensitivity on how it was is staggering. and going south where the jobs and wealth was wasn't always possible for people who had nothing and had families and other family members to look out for.

shesariver · 12/04/2013 21:18

She was voted in 3 times - so you are saying that the majority of the british population are what? idiots? misguided? we wanted her as PM!

Maybe in England but no-one in Scotland did though.

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 21:19

As far as I'm aware BegoniaBampot, the history of the human race is about moving from one area to another for survival. Our ancestors all did it, the Anglo-Saxons did it, I did it, and if the spoilt bloody jobs-for-lifers from male-dominated industries can't do it, then I don't see why taxpayers should fund their lifestyles for the next three decades as well as listening to their endless whinging.

Plenty of families have less than ideal situations, with one or more members being taken away from home for work, or having to relocate.

This was also in a time of not only free higher education, remember, but grants for living expenses while undergoing free education.

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 21:21

Actually, shesariver, plenty of people in Scotland did vote for her. And its only in recent terms in Scottish history that Scotland was an industrialised nation. The area that saw the closures of the steelworks, around Ravenscraig, was previously known for its apple orchards farmed by monks. This is very recent Scottish history and a very short period within that history, and I'm not convinced that the unions did an awful lot of good for Scotland in the long term.

BegoniaBampot · 12/04/2013 21:28

yes, what we need is a few apple orchards to provide jobs. they should have planted some when Ravenscraig was levelled. Strange you mention it, my father was one of the thousands made redundant from there.

Abra1d · 12/04/2013 21:49

The unions did very little good for any of northern Britain. It was the likes of Scargill that brought down those societies. Everyone became so fed up with them that they were hardened to the suffering. Scargill was an awful man.

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 21:57

The point is, BegoniaBampot, that most people moved to the Central Belt of Scotland for jobs, quite possibly within living memory of those made redundant. It was previously a rural area. They had not lived there for centuries, with some ancient ancestral claim to the land. So why is it unreasonable that once the jobs are gone, it might be a good idea to move somewhere for jobs once more? Plenty did...

unlucky83 · 12/04/2013 22:02

I come from the north of England ...in the late 1800s/early 1900s our village had 100 small pits ...one by one they closed down...the situation evolved ... people moved away and back again and found new jobs...a gradual process - the difference was the NUM with its head in the sand forced it to be the way it became ...you really shouldn't blame Thatcher for that ...
A lot of local towns existed purely because of the industrial revolution - and suffered from the closure of the cotton (and wool) mills... most of them in the 1960s and 70s - was Margaret Thatcher to blame for that?
Not hearing anyone expressing outrage for the poor mill workers...

I did go to London in the late 80s ...but mainly for adventure - I was never short of a job as a teenager (even with the 3m unemployed)...

LessMissAbs · 12/04/2013 22:05

unlucky83 Not hearing anyone expressing outrage for the poor mill workers

That seems to be the preserve of male-dominated industries/sectors...

Xenia · 12/04/2013 22:16

I am from the North too and some of my ancestors moved from Ireland to the NE to mine for work and then when work goes they go elsewhere - one went to work in India in the 20s. I moved hundreds of miles away from family for work. These were not towns where people had mined for 500 years. People have always moved where the work was. Thatcher ensured a generation became prosperous and things have never once gone back to how back they were in the 1970s.

People are now owed livings. You have to make your life, work hard, move. The entitled who want to take take take always do badly and are perpetuating moral wrongs. They will always be the losers. If they could change their mentality to be more Thatcherite they and their children would feel internally happier and they would do better. They need more personal responsibility rather than some all mighty communist state will provide.

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