I mean those idiots who sit in the longest queue, blocking everyone else in while half the pumps sit unused, because they refuse to do a little simple reversing or to drag the pump lead over to the other side of the car. I could almost pity them, poor fools.
So, I drove in, saw the only available pump was on the wrong side for me. No trouble, I thought smugly, niftily performing a three-point turn on the forecourt and parking up on the correct side.
Got out to discover that this car has the cap on the other side from my old petrol car. 
Which I did sort of know but, being an idiot, had forgotten.
Never mind, I thought, getting back in, if I just pull forward a few feet I'll be able to get the hose across the back to the wrong side. I pulled forward. I got out.
Opened the cap to find the handy 'diesel' reminder written on the underside. Bollocks. Now I'd moved my car away from the petrol leads they wouldn't reach.
Got back in. Performed another three-point turn. Got out and filled up from the correct side with the correct fuel, just several aeons minutes later than when I'd started. Tried not to look at other people pissing themselves.
(My AIBU, if the thread police are around, is your choice between the thread title and the more likely 'AIBU to think I am a total twit who lacks the intelligence to drive a car?')
AIBU?
those idiots who block queues in the petrol station, why can't they be more like me?
LRDtheFeministDragon · 08/04/2013 14:15
Doing the twist n' check is more of a problem on cars where the petrol tank flappy thingy (that is the technical term) is flush against the side of the car and manually operated. I have recently discovered on our car that I can pull the little open-tank-lever by my foot in the driver's seat, the flap pops open, and I can see it in my wing mirrors. Still have to do it every time though
DH once worked at a company where one of the directors had an unfortunate experience at a petrol station.
Having driven onto the forecourt in order to fill up, he misjudged his speed/angle, mounted the curb and crashed into the pump!
He then panicked and drove off. I understand, he left petrol spraying from the badly damaged pump.
According to DH, the police arrived to interview him in the middle of a board meeting 
This reply has been deleted
Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.
I once failed to open the fuel tank on DH's car so got back in and drove away. The shame!
A lady came into our petrol station and asked if we knew how to open her hire cars fuel tank as she couldn't do it and had virtually no fuel left. I went out had a fiddle around with it, managed to open it but couldn't explain how so she was still non the wiser
soup, you might need to read beyond the first line of the OP ... it's a pisstake. Of myself. Not the 'fools'.
I always wait for a pump on the right side but I ensure I'm not blocking access to other pumps - usually go to the queue at the sides. My fear of hose not stretching is greater than my impatience at waiting. I drive our family car - a touran. It's bottom is bigger than mine! This is a very funny thread OP. My petrol station story is waiting in the queue behind the smartly dressed young woman who got out of her car at the pump whilst talking on the phone, started to fill up, still talking on the phone, got tannoyed and didn't notice, still talking on the phone. I was about to get out and point this out to her when sensibly dressed fifty year old woman at the neighbouring pump tapped her on the shoulder and gave her a huge mouthful. Young woman look stunned, hung up, filled up with about £3.50 worth of petrol and drove off in chagrin.
Bananaketchup
You are a far better woman than me... I was so embarrassed that I got back in the car and left
after giving the woman in the shop a big grumpy arms up 'WTF' shrug and grumbling to my 8yr old so much that he tells everyone the hoses dont reach at Sainsburys
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.