To get pissed off at children running around in restaurants?

[CelticPixie]

We went out for lunch today and there was a large group sat behind us. It was obviously a family celebration with parents, grandparents, kids etc. A little boy from the group who must have been around two was running around our part of the restaurant screaming and shouting and getting under the feet of waiting staff carrying hot food etc. He also kept approaching people at other tables and kept asking them if they were having their dinner and what they were having. At no point did his parents do anything to stop him and they just kept on smiling at him, but it was obvious that he was getting on everyone else's nerves.

Its a family friendly place and there were lots of other small children in there but he was the only one running about and being a nuisance. I will NOT allow my DDs to run about and disrupt others people's meals and it pisses me off that other people have so little consideration for anyone but themselves. If mine wants to go to the loo one of us takes them, if they are bored we take them out to the play area. It's really not hard is it?

Ffs being nice is different to say not putting your elbows on the table or whatever. My children and I were and are taught to love everyone as if they are your brother or sister and put yourself in other peoples shoes, don't judge people and that everyone is equal and to think positively

Those things are what being considerate is. Being considerate isn't about using the correct fork or not speaking during dinner....

Well MsBella I would rather say something "vile and disgusting" to your little darling than tip hot food over them while I am working. I am currently helping out a friend at his pub and I have had several near misses with pain in the arse kids that wont sit down and behave like the others. You might find it adorable and cute but I find it bloody irritating and dangerous. LQ is right in that most people wont say "Please sit your child down and stop it ruining my lunch" but will smile through gritted teeth, eat quickly and not go back to that restaurant again.

Still, I am sure that your "positive responses" will make up for third degree burns and a bill for wasted food

Bella, if you were putting yourself in other people's shoes, maybe you'd consider that not everyone wants to watch your child wandering around a restaurant or to interact with them?

good lord this is getting stupid now its like being in the school playground

what are you going to ask MsBella next if she allows her young child to cross the motorway by themselves

has she ever said she allows her children to wonder about while she does not bother to watch them as she is enjoying her lucnh all she has said is that she does not expect her children to sit at a table for the whole of the time the are there they are allowed a little freedom and they have chatted to strangers who have chatted back when does that equal running about screaming, annoying other people and getting in the way of staff and creating a potential danger

Its not rude to sit and chat with the people you are eating WITH. We sit and chat every meal time, they know not to talk with their mouths full of food tho! But to go up to people you dont know at a restaraunt and interrupt their meal and convetsation is rude yes!

And ds2 is a very happy boy, his teacher loves him, he is outgoing and funny and also polite and caring with great empathy. We often get told how kind and considetate he is :)

Showing consideration to others is very important.

I believe it's very relevant, I used a car seat to protect my DCs from potential harm in the unlikely event of an accident ( this was before it was a legal requirement).
I would not allow small children to wander around where staff are serving hot food and drinks for exactlty the same reason.
That is not 'health and safety' gone mad, just pure common sense.

Being considerate is allowing other people to enjoy their free time without your kids under their nose, and allowing food service workers to do their job without worrying about your kids under their feet.

Please tell me you dont live in the East Mids, I dont want to encounter your "free spirits" when I am at work!

5madthings ffs scroll up a little bit and you'll see how considerate my children are... we obviously have different ideas of what considerate means

Why do you keep asking what the problem is? There have been dozens of people on about 30 pages telling you what it is - it annoys other people, it's dangerous. So are you saying that it doesn't and it isn't?

it is stupid you know it and there is underlying bullying going on here as it has got very personal all directed at one person

you are showing yourself up far more with these stupid comments

bella allowing your children to wander around in a restaraunt so they can 'explore' is not considerate to the waitress staff who are serving hot food/drinks.

They are busy and dont need to be trying to avoid toddlers and worrying about scalding a child. They need to be able to get on with their job.

I think that this issue is one that requires healthy balance and there is no always-right answer. To take the original post and judge it based on the circumstances written, I would say undoubtedly the parents were negligent in their responsibility of helping that child behave properly.

It is not always easy though and I do believe it is harder for some parents and with some children than others. If the child has lost it and simply cannot sit still, and the parents are just trying to get through the meal so they can get the child home and out of the way, I do not think it is beyond expectation that others might turn a blind eye to a bit of wandering and lack of decorum from a little child so that a family can finish their meal. At the same time, there certainly comes a point where if the child is bothering people and getting in the way or creating safety concerns you just need to pick that child up and leave. I think where we get offended is when it seems clear that the parents just do not care, have not tried, and do not think they should have to try. Those who are at their wits end and just trying to get through the last few minutes without their child screaming the place down, and have been trying hard to parent the child, with them I sympathize 'cause I sure have been there.

Freudian a child does not need to be running around screaming in a restaurant to be at risk of being hurt. Children are small and not in the eye line of someone trying to carry a large tray of hot food through a busy restaurant. It is the parents responsibility to make sure that the child isnt at risk and doesnt put anyone else at risk.

I resent the accusation of bullying, there does however appear to be only one poster who continues to persist in the notion that small children should be allowed to wander freely around restaurants.
If another poster says the same I shall engage with them in a similar fashion.

Did anyone actually say that children shouldn't talk at the table and/or must use the correct fork? -I haven't read the whole thread as I would get a migraine

These are not the same at all as roaming about.

Surely the normal thing to do with a child who won't sit for long periods, which is fair enough, is to take them outside for a breather and a quick change of scene. Works for me.

Nope, no one has uttered their disgust at incorrect use of cutlery. That's just a huge red herring.

I don't see any bullying either. I see people typing their views and disagreeing though. If disagreeing with someone, even strongly, makes me a bully then I shall remember to never utter another point of view and become a sheep.

and MsBella is not capable of watching her own child

I'm going out for dinner tonight with DH and the DCs, I had considered Pizza Express but thanks to Freud's comments I think I'll give it a miss.

She is capable. I'm sure she is very capable, but she chooses not to.

don't think I have ever experienced a country where toddlers roam around freely in restaurants. At least I have not picked up on it and I have lived in a number of countries.

They don't where I am now for instance (Czech Republic). They sit at the table with the families. Would have thought this would be the norm actually, except in something like a relaxed outdoor restaurant/cafe with a children's playground attached. Then I could imagine dc would wander back and forth.

Tbh have never paid much attention to it but I would have noticed and dc running about between tables and in the way of waiting staff.

As I've said I don't let dc get far away, maybe 2 tables and I do watch him

i don't agree that there is bullying either. MsBella seems robust enough to me, and this is a debate, not a bullying session.

i have sauv no stupid or personal comments made about my parenting have been made towards me