To get pissed off at children running around in restaurants?

[CelticPixie]

We went out for lunch today and there was a large group sat behind us. It was obviously a family celebration with parents, grandparents, kids etc. A little boy from the group who must have been around two was running around our part of the restaurant screaming and shouting and getting under the feet of waiting staff carrying hot food etc. He also kept approaching people at other tables and kept asking them if they were having their dinner and what they were having. At no point did his parents do anything to stop him and they just kept on smiling at him, but it was obvious that he was getting on everyone else's nerves.

Its a family friendly place and there were lots of other small children in there but he was the only one running about and being a nuisance. I will NOT allow my DDs to run about and disrupt others people's meals and it pisses me off that other people have so little consideration for anyone but themselves. If mine wants to go to the loo one of us takes them, if they are bored we take them out to the play area. It's really not hard is it?

If I ever see a toddler wandering around a restaurant unaccompanied, I will take it to the manager and suggest they are lost. Would that embarrass you enough to sort out your parental responsibilities MsBell ?

Also teaching children from a young age how to behave in situations opens a lot more opportunities for them.

DS is 3 and has been to the cinema and theatre with me because he knows how to behave. Giving a child freedom is great when the location allows that but keeping in acceptable behaviour allows for more opportunities for a child not less.

Health and safety gone mad in my opinion! There are risks everywhere

I think they are a lot happier than most kids because of the way I brought them up and isn't that the most important thing

Do you expect your children to use car seats?

It isn't just about health & safety. It is about not letting your child irritate other people.

And what about these whole other countries where the kids are free, are all those parents wrong

Goodness me, I only have family in France and Germany, so don't know about "whole other countries" apart from those 2, but from my observation both within my family there and more generally French ad German parents are far stricter about their children's behaviour in public than we are in the UK.

In France particularly, and especially when eating out, which children are taught is a serious pleasure where good behaviour is required!

As someone said upthread, it's not the children who are sniffed at, it's the parents, who don't attempt to do anything about their children's behaviour in public. I think we're all clued up enough to see the difference between parents who don't do anything, and parents who are trying to deal with their children's intrusive behaviour. If a parent is obviously trying to handle a child's exuberance/tiredness/whatever in public, so that the child doesn't intrude in unwanted ways on others, I hope we all would cut them slack and understand. A lot of us have been there.

But call me cynical I've just come off a train where I had the pleasure [not] of having someone's very noisy toddler shouting in my ear. In the Quiet Zone. And his mother made NO attempt at all to engage him, to interest him, or stop him shouting and shrieking (his shrieks were particularly ear-piercing). It wasn't tiredness or discomfort sort of shrieking that seemed to be his way of communicating. She sat across the aisle from him & read her magazine. I now have the mother of all headaches.

In the countries I've volunteered in (so not france or germany etc) there were loads of kids wandering around in the restaurants, it was great and nobody had a problem with it, they were more hectic than my ds in restaurants but it was fine! And this goes for all the places I've volunteered in a lot of different restaurants I ate at! They are doing it right I say

Laqueen my kids get positive responses, smiles aswell. [Hmm]

Oh ffs making sure your child doesnt create a danger in a restataunt isnt health and safety gone mad its common bloody sense.

I actually dont mind talking to little toddlers and interacting with them, i have one and i find them cute. But i do not want to see one scalded by hot drink/food and as a parent i couldnt live with myself if my child was scalded in a situation i could have prevented by making them behave aporopriately and thus keeping them safe!!

As an aside i was talking to dp about this and ds2 overheard so i askef him his opinion his reply... That it was dangerous and the child could get hurt and thrn he added that the othet customers might not like it and its rude to interrupt people eating esp if you dont know them.

It would appear my ten yr old has more common sense than some adults.

Why does it matter what country I'm in, laqueen... how can those whole countries be wrong, they're just not but you assume you're right

I reckon he has, 5mad.

Laqueen what a VILE DISGUSTING thing to say about my children what is actually wrong with you? Yes they do get positive responses and smiles they are very sweet and caring to people

these 'social norms' and shit

So good behaviour is "shit"? Crikey!

I was taught, and tried to pass on, that "manners" wasn't which fork to use, but considering other people before oneself.

Do you expect your children to use car seats MsBella?

I lived abroad as a child, sardinia and cyprus etc. We ate out a lot, children were oftrn entertained and brought small toys etc by the waiters but they stayed sat in their seats! I remember a waiter making me a bracelet out of ribbon and showinh me how to do a slip knot. I loved it, i expect he also appreciated the fact that my oarents taught my sister and i how to behave and made sure we sat down and had aporopriate manners.

I personally wasn't raised with things like 'its rude to speak while someones eating' I mean ffs how can that be right... and I don't teach that to my kids.. if it doesn't harm anyone there's not a problem!

Freudian I don't think anyone has a problem with noisy children, as long as it's not distressed children being ignored. Very young children in restaurants, being noisy and messy, are pretty much unavoidable and we've all been there. It's the totally avoidable wandering around, annoying other diners and getting in the way of people carrying hot food that is an issue. Ok, some people may not mind being chatted to by random youngsters while they are trying to enjoy their meal, but others might and you can't tell the difference. Therefore best to err on the side of caution. It won't kill children to be taught to sit on a chair for the time it takes to eat a meal and I would always make allowances for a child with special needs because I'm not really a grumpy old bag.

I think MsBella mentioned something about not always having to worry about a disaster that may never happen, or words to that effect. Well I may have been an overanxious parent (I wasn't, by the way) but isn't that what most parents do - became health and safety experts where their offspring are concerned.

Yes when I had a car I used car seats but your point is irrelevant