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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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to think my friends shouldn't be propositioning me for sex??

165 replies

JilllyArmeen · 04/04/2013 21:59

went out with my friend at the weekend and stayed over as i have before one of my oldest and best friends so not weird to share a bed but he tried it on! i forgave him as we had alot to drink and some drugs iand i don't want to loose my friend.
today another friend asks me if i want to be his fwb!
im i jjust giving off slut vibes or what??

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JilllyArmeen · 04/04/2013 23:48

lili i came here because im shocked this has happened. and now for the lolz it is lighthearted Lucy. thanks

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alwayslateforwork · 04/04/2013 23:48

Tee hee.

Loads of fems use slut. Have you never heard of slutwalk? Odd, pretty much all the fems I know have.

Totes not my point.

So. As a fem, jillllllllllly, what brings you here asking the least feministy questions I've ever heard this side of the local strip joint?

alwayslateforwork · 04/04/2013 23:49

I wondered, ladybeagleeyes, but it doesn't seem quite right... Still pondering. Might go and have a walk round and see.

SPsFanjoTheBigStickyHaribo · 04/04/2013 23:50

Its the drugs mi dear. Hes really a figment of your drug fuelled mind. So no slut vibes just lonely and high vibes I'm afraid.

JilllyArmeen · 04/04/2013 23:51

'totes not my point'
what is your point? how is it the least fem question?

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GaryBarlowsPants · 05/04/2013 00:03

This is my favourite thread ever.

Also, can I just say - I wish my nickname was crapbag

alwayslateforwork · 05/04/2013 00:05

The drugs are adding your brain, duck.

No fem ever ponders 'am i just giving off slut vibes or what' when a bloke tries it on.

A fem says 'I can get pissed and fall asleep, and if you try to take advantage of me, I know fecking well it's not me. It's you, oh penised-one'.

Just because I am drunk does not give you the right to try to jump me. Just because I have (ooo, for the first time) taken drugs does not give you the right to paw me. Just because I decided to gussy up and wear a shirt that my tits fall out of doesn't give you the right to assume a shag. Just because I allow you to crash in my room doesn't give you any entitlement at all.'

A fem knows damn well that she's not giving off slut vibes, and will have plenty of the sex in a consensual way if she fancies it, but she doesn't require anyone with a penis trying to assume she owes it to them.

A fem would never in a million years jump onto a chat forum, announce she is a feminist, and then wonder if she is exuding a 'shag me' vibe. (And I have yet to meet one that announces she's a grown up and can drink and can drugs, but, y'know.)

Well, not any I've met, anyways.

You'd be a pretty crap feminist if you were trying to assume the blame for the male ego, wouldn't you?

Or were, you being, y'know, ironic....?

Tone is so difficult on tinternet.

sjupes · 05/04/2013 00:09

alwayslate

I think i love you Grin

that post is everything i wish i was smart enough to put into words, never mind coherent sentences.

Well said.

Sunnywithshowers · 05/04/2013 00:12

OP, you're right, you should expect to be able to sleep next to a male friend and not get molested.

JilllyArmeen · 05/04/2013 00:14

i take your point always..very well made its just that its twice in a week two different men i thought were friends that are making assumptions about me can you see why im not pleased about it?

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JilllyArmeen · 05/04/2013 00:17

thank you sunny. so im not being unreasonable and its not me

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Maryz · 05/04/2013 00:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lucyellensmum95 · 05/04/2013 00:31

Ah yes, YANBU! :) and not a slut,flibertygibbet,nanny goat, procrastinator or any variation therof! Wink

alwayslateforwork · 05/04/2013 00:34

'It's just that it's twice in a week' blah blah.

See, that makes you an even crapper feminist.

It should be casting your fem principles in iron that entitled penised types are everywhere, not making you go 'oooooooo, I'm such a feminist. I wonder if i'm giving off slut vibes?'

What sort of fem doesn't get rabidly high horsey than she's being treated like wank fodder by multiple blokes?

'Not pleased about it'

Bwahahahahahahaha!

No, you are not BU to think your friends shouldn't be propositioning you for sex.

You def are BU if you are asking this question, pondering if you are giving off slut vibes, and claiming you are a feminist all in the same post.

balia · 05/04/2013 00:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

waltermittymissus · 05/04/2013 00:37

Oh, here we go...

MsTakenidentity · 05/04/2013 00:38

Schools go back on Monday Smile.. but thanks OP for not doing a Philpott post

Ullena · 05/04/2013 00:41

Serious question: is it normal to randomly hop into other folks beds then? I thought you were meant to crash on sofas/floors!

Sad Grin
Lucyellensmum95 · 05/04/2013 00:41

10,9,8,7......................................

alwayslateforwork · 05/04/2013 00:41

Just jump him, balia. (Or her). And then wait for him to start an Aibu about his friends who happen to be girls keep trying to molest him.

I'm all for a parental permission approach though. They might offer to escort, if you're lucky.

ComposHat · 05/04/2013 00:47

I choose my friends based on the likelihood of them propositioning me for sex.

Me too, although being in prison it is pretty much a given.

pollypandemonium · 05/04/2013 00:58

Jilly how old are you?

Softlysoftly · 05/04/2013 00:58

See I get so disappointed In these threads, we always start off at a lack of spacing, capitals and punctuation. Have the fabulous addition of "that's why I can drink loads and do drugs".

Then we meander into "slattern procrastinater" and "negligent feminist"

Commit to a persona people, commit!

JilllyArmeen · 05/04/2013 01:03

thanks always i will admit im a crap feminist. not as crap as balia tho so that's something
its normal for me to sleep in beds with friends I've shared with this guy before and nothing happened. sofas and floors are just too uncomfortable when there's a good bed

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JilllyArmeen · 05/04/2013 01:10

am 25 immature for my age.that's why I've only just started snorting coke i used to smoke weed but I've realised that's kids stuff and i need to grow up

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