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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the whole men withdraw to their cave is utterly bollocks

11 replies

InNeedOfBrandy · 04/04/2013 18:59

I'm not talking about space, which everyone needs male or female I'm talking about men are from mars kinda crap.

OP posts:
Pilfette · 04/04/2013 19:02

YANBU - I loathe that book and similar 'views' that just perpetuate these types of myth, thereby excusing behaviour on the grounds of gender

badguider · 04/04/2013 19:02

I think some people when they've had a hard day like to get away and be alone and some people like to spew it all out in a big splurge of chat...

I'm vaguely willing to believe that there are are more men than women in the first category and vice versa.

But I agree, that there is generally more variation within the range of individuals each sex than there is difference between the two sexes.

Pilfette · 04/04/2013 19:04

Badguider said it much better and with less rage than me!

headinhands · 04/04/2013 19:04

Yes! Hate the gender stereotypes it reinforces. She goes off shopping with her 'girls' while he broods in a cave. It worries me how great people think the book is.

AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate · 04/04/2013 19:05

Oh god yes. Utter bollocks.

My normal recommendation in this situation is Delusions of Gender by Cordelia Fine. Then you can rant more efficiently.

AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate · 04/04/2013 19:05

Not that you aren't ranting efficiently. Oh bollocks, been a long day. You know what I mean.

Pilfette · 04/04/2013 19:06

Second vote for Delusions of Gender, really good read.

Original poster
InNeedOfBrandy · 04/04/2013 19:07

I am so amazoning that amanda thank you. Urgh I'm annoyed with it, if the man fucks off and doesn't ring you for 2 weeks it is because he's a dick and only wants you when he wants something, no do not be open to receive him back and keep your love he is using you and you are not important to him. ARGH rant over

OP posts:
Fleecyslippers · 04/04/2013 19:14

YANBU. Ex got hold of this book and seemed to adopt it as a bible to justify his need to withdraw from nightcare of the kids/family life etc.
In reality he was an abusive arse who was fucking his secretary but he used the crap in that book to justify his behaviour. I remember the relate counsellor raising her eyebrows when he referred to it - now I know why!

Original poster
InNeedOfBrandy · 04/04/2013 20:08

bollocks that we are chalk and cheese is what I say.

OP posts:
Bunfags · 04/04/2013 20:18

I read that man are from Mars book, or whatever it's called. It was so riveting I can't remember much about it.

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