to think if you have a giant rottweiler you should say so when you invite children to play?

[kawliga]

Or is it up to me, whenever my daughter is invited to play with schoolfriends to ask their parents 'by the way, might you happen to have a giant rottweiler the size of a small tractor in your house'?

This was a friendly dog and dd is not frightened of dogs, but we don't have dogs ourselves so she is also not used to them. This dog, the sheer size of it, could knock a grown man over even if it's just playing. When I arrived to pick her up DD was cowering in the corner although later she told me she had fun playing there, so no harm done. Just feel a bit uneasy. I feel like I should have known so I could say something like 'there's a big dog there but it's friendly so don't worry' before she went there to play. AIBU?

[Lucyellensmum95]

But seriously, I would not have been that impressed actually - I would have wanted to be told they had a dog (doesn't really matter what type) and it should not have been around the children unsupervised. My BIL was bitten by a big dog because he was messing around with his friend, the dog became defensive and bit him - he still has the scar.

I have two JRTs and tend to put them out if people come with children as my dogs are stupid rather bouncy and in your face bastards. They have no malice but i would hate for them to jump up and scratch someone's child.

[pigletmania]

Yanbu what if the Chidren had allergies. It's courtesy to. I would want to know so tat I can ask the owner questions before allowing my Chidren to go round the house. What if the owner is not shutting the dog away from Children, I most certainly would like to know. Any dog has the potential to snap

[TwoBrasDontMakeABodice]

I think the breed of the dog is a red herring all dog breeds have some capacity for violence. Same as humans - the decent ones just have a higher tolerance until all hell breaks loose.

[ComposHat]

I used to have a rotwieller the size of a truck precisely so we didn#t have to have kids over to play

which reminds me of a joke I was told in Liverpool. If you park anywhere near Liverpool FC on match day kids will offer to 'mind' your car. Anyway a bloke parks his car outside the ground with a massive rottweiler in the back.

A little lad approach es him and says 'mind your car for a fiver mister?'

Don't talk soft sats the bloke whose going to nick the car with a bloody great rottie in the back.

Very true replied the lad with amischievous grin - 'but what is he like at putting out car fires? '

[TwoBrasDontMakeABodice]

I used to have a rotwieller the size of a truck precisely so we didn#t have to have kids over to play smile

Genius!

[Owllady]

I don't know whether I tell people or not tbh that we have dogs but they are under control anyway and if children are scared of them I will separate them or alternatively they can go home

I don't think the breed or size of the dog is important

[TwoBrasDontMakeABodice]

I don't think the breed or size of the dog is important It might be to some people though, no? Some people freak out at a Great Dane, which are stupidly friendly dogs, but then are fine with a Chihuahua which are little bastards if truth be told. Ankle biters ha!

[pigletmania]

What often child has allergies!

[LtEveDallas]

One thing I will add - If DD was inviting someone to our house I would check with the parent how that child was with dogs - BUT - If child didn't like dogs I would give the parent the choice as to whether the play date went ahead or not, as I wouldn't shut the dog away or outside.

It's the dogs home as much as mine and DDs.

If the child was fine with dogs, I would probably do something 'doggy' with them (like a walk or treat and train session) to make sure the dog wasn't nervy of the child.

One of DDs friends was scared of dogs, but with encouragement from her father she met ours, got used to them and was devastated when RottDog died. She is still nervous of dogs she doesn't know, but is absolutely fine with MuttDog (who is extremely gentle and scared of spiders...{grin}).

[pigletmania]

I think it is the parents responsibility to let the parents of any visiting child know if there is going to be a dog there

[DreamsTurnToGoldDust]

I have two dogs, always tell parents before asking a child to play, its manners init, I know some children are scared of dogs and wouldnt want to upset anyone.

[babybythesea]

I'm going to bow out of this thread now I think as it's starting to go round in circles.

I'll say it again though - most responsible owners would be either putting their dog out of the way, or supervising the dog and children,

Contrary to what some people seem to think, most (obviously not all or there would never be any accidents) people who have both dogs and kids are well aware of any risks and are not looking to put their own children in any danger, never mind any visiting children. There are always going to be stories to the contrary. Doesn't make it the majority of owners who would behave that way. Just like there will always be stories of dangerous drivers - doesn't make all drivers dangerous, and it's definitely not a reason to stop your child going round to someone's house (or stop them being driven in a car, to continue the analogy). But please, while you are busy displaying links to dog bite victims, bear in mind that me taking a photo of my child (and every child who has been to my house) with a caption saying "Look, here are children who have not been mauled by the 'friendly family dog' because we were aware of the risks and took the safety of the kids (and dog) seriously will never make news. I may also take photos of myself, my sister and every friend who ever visited either of us as we always had dogs growing up.

I will now be more mindful of informing people we have a dog but there will almost certainly still be occasions where it slips my mind - because, as I said before, she is just part of our home and until recently it would have no more occured to me to tell people in advance than it would occur to me to tell people that a man lives at our house (dd's Dad!).

I would definitely not be bothered if someone asked though - why would you be, especially if someone is nervous or has allergies. In fact, I'd say if you do have allergies, then it is important you do ask. As someone else said, I wouldn't inform someone of every potential danger point in my house (bread in the bread bin for the lactose intolerant, milk in the fridge for the lactose intolerant, peanuts in the cupboard for those who can't tolerate nuts, squash for kids who can't cope with additives....) - if there are allergies I'd expect to be told as a parent in charge of someone else's child for a bit. If someone is nervous enough to enquire in advance then it's sure as hell not a problem for me if they ask.

If I forget to mention it and someone comes who is nervous, I'm not nasty enough to then leave them on their own with the dog so please stop talking as though dog owners are all completely insensitive. I will, by the same token, try and remember to inform people that I live with a hound.

[maisiejoe123]

Rottweiler owner here....

I think if you are really worried about dogs (and the OP seems to be) then you need to ask. Our dog has been taught never to jump up but when new children come to play she is put in her crate and introduced AFTER I have told the new children how to behave, dont wave your arms around, dont scream in terror, completely ignore her...

If they are really really scared I will of course leave it but tbh - dogs are everywhere. Realistically you do need to be able to cope with dogs generally.

I once had a large dog head straight for me in the park, I turned around and folded by arms, showed no interest in them at all and the silly thing just ran straight past me....

Also, our rottie does tricks for EVERYONE if a biscuit is involved. I have never had a child refuse to help do a trick with me once they have seen how it is done.

TBH - for us, the key is making sure the dog doesnt jump up. They are really strong... However I cannot be responsible for her passing wind. Now that definitely clears a room and because its silent people who dont each other that well start looking at each other

[LtEveDallas]

However I cannot be responsible for her passing wind. Now that definitely clears a room

Oh yes, as much as I miss RottDog, I certainly don't miss that aspect - oh, nor the snoring.

[maisiejoe123]

With big dogs (and we had a small dog before) you need to be firm with them. We dont allow our rottie upstairs. We dont allow her to be fed from the table or allow guests to do it. We dont treat her like a baby or carry her around in a handbag (as if you could!).

Ironically I dont always mention we have a dog let alone a rottie. The kids love that she does the tricks for them. Sometimes they mention to their parents and sometimes they dont. I have had parents ask me if I have a dog as they never see and hear her. She doesnt bark when anyone comes to the front door... I know very odd. Very occasionally when someone knocks and it is dark she will bark but only a warning bark.

Everyone says in the event of real trouble she would be there but somehow I am not so sure.....

[Pigsmummy]

I mention that we have a cat, he is very friendly and I still giggle at the memory of him sitting on the clipboard of the double glazing salesman when he was trying to work out a price for us! If I had a dog, goat, badger, horse etc then I would mention it.

[JackieTheFart]

YANBU, I would like to be informed as I am scared of dogs. I know this is not their issue but I would expect the courtesy in case of allergies at the least.

[QueenOfCats]

Yabu to expect it yes.

Having said that, when our dog was still with us I would mention it when any children/people with children were coming round.

On a slightly different note, dd has a friend who is terrified of cats. Should I mention this when people are due round just incase?

[maisiejoe123]

I have to say if you are that scared and your children have allergies YOU need to ask. People arent mind readers.....

[maisiejoe123]

I have a colleague who has a parrot who has learnt some rude words. I hear him on the phone sometimes...

Perhaps if he has anyone around he should warn them he 'has a parrot that has learnt some rude words' in case there are very sensistive people around.

Oh wait - someone will come on in a minute saying that if their child is around they need to be 'warned' there is a rude parrot... Perhaps the child wont be allowed to come, after all its impossible to shut this bird up!

[Owllady]

I have a rude swearing daughter (she has SN) I don't warn people about her either

[ChristmasJubilee]

I wouldn't think to mention that I have a dog. We have a lovely, friendly black lab. He has been brought up with children and has never been any problem around them however, if other children are visiting, I would put him out in his kennel or in the utility room behind a baby gate. He doesn't get to meet them.

[maisiejoe123]

The point I am making tbh is that are always some people who have a problem with something. Where does it end. Do you state that someone in the house smokes, or the house is very cold, or its a mess, or that you have a cat, dog or parrot, and that your children eat chicken nuggets every day. Is that a problem to some people - who knows!

Where do you stop informing people about things they MIGHT have an issue with.

If I had an allergy to a cat I would ask not automatically assume that someone would tell me they had a cat......

[KnockMeDown]

Bearing in mind the news today, I would want to know, and I don't care who that offends. Cats, parrots and chicken nuggets don't kill in packs of 5

[Owllady]

I'm with you maisejoe, I think people look for things to be offended about these days
I draw the conclusion they have boring lives and lack things to talk about