Are SAHMS discriminated against. Red magazine are doing an article about it.

[Darkesteyes]

Just seen this on twitter.

Are stay at home mums discriminated against? Are you one and unhappy with benefits, or feel judged? Tell us.
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janey

I know it doesn't affect me as not seeking work, but I do think it a fair point. There must be many in this situation as we all became geographically mobile.
Do you think some larger companies might start a creche for this purpose, or do you envisage the same problems as nurseries and childminders you mentioned.

You need to raise future generations to pay taxes and pay off this debt though? They need educating? There are health outcomes? The NHS is costly? If we were healthier, would be less costly? If families were more able (financially, and in other ways) to care for elderly relatives, social costs would be less? Why does Cameron spout on about Big Society?

hobbies, interests and freedom to do as we like - and you want the rest of us to pay you for that?

KazooblueThu 28-Mar-13 22:00:29
The fact is mums and babies/children want to be together/need to be together

please can you link to some research, esp. about babies 'wanting'/'needing' their mothers to SAH.

oh i really enjoy scottishmummys post. i like her wit.

But many women dont sacrifice their salary, many dont work prior to having children and dont work when the child starts school. Choosing to not work is a choice the individal makes, the state is not their to support lifestyle changes.

The economy is everything, we need people to contribute. Those getting help with childcare via tax relief will be paying tax plus keeping childcare workers in jobs and therefore contributing as well. SAHP dont contribute anything to the pot and take out on the form of pension contributions which workers have to earn. To want an allowance and childcare on top is sheer madness and indulgence. If you want perks like payment, you earn it in the form of a salary like the rest.

I dont think there is resentment towards SAHPs unless they are staying home using benefits so costing people who work and parent. Those that self support can do what they like but this thread shows that they expect the state to reward them for becoming a parent and choosing not to work. Its entitlements like that that people judge.

Kazoo I'm desperate to volunteer work to build up cv but I can't until seconds hold at school. We made a decision and we are locked into Dhs job.

I've thought so much about going back to my old profession but

1. DH can't guarantee to be here on set days, he has city type job.
2. so if I did go back tow work now it would meat doing what I do now plus ft work, granted I would get a cleaner, ironing service, gardener - what's the point?

Overall what we have is good for us as a family but not always for me as an individual, but same for DH as he misses out on stuff sometimes. But we see it as temporary.

If it bothers these SAHM that much, losing CB, they could always get hubby to drop a couple of days work and they could work them instead. More time for dad with the kids, good balance of home and work for mum, and get CB back.

I suspect a lot we're hearing from on here won't though, because they'd rather hubby had the responsibility of earning the big bucks.

i am a mother - raising my children myself and very proud of it

not a 'wife' certainly not married to my house

Luckily for scottishmummy i also run a small business so that maybe lifts me out of the bog brush and latte ghetto

triple at this whole thread

No Janey because hubby(partner in my case so quit with the patronising tone)would lose his job.

But many sahp have contributed greatly to the pot, and will continue to do so for many years to come. What seems like a long time now, a career break of a few years, is nothing in terms of a lifetime of work. Why is it harder to employ two people to jobshare than one? Why is flexible working bad? There are talented, skilled individuals that could contribute to the economy if employers addressed their prejudices.

Yes happy like the benefit family of 9kids I saw last night I was appalled but not just for that.

Hypothetically, if I went back to work tomorrow and managed to get a job earning what I was on before I had dc (not likely I know), dh and I would be on a joint income of 90k. He could pay more into his pension, hence reduce his salary to 50k. We would keep CB and be sitting pretty. I would be taking up a salary that I wasn't desperately in need of to the detriment of someone else who might be in real need of that money. The government would give us CB for 3 dc and give us tax relief for child care. How exactly would we be generating loads of money for the economy?

Mirry, I listed what I generally do as a SAHP up thread, most of which has nothing to do with domestic drudgery.

Happynapies- it costs employers more to employ jobsharers and not every job lends itself to flexible working.

HappyMummyofOne. Well articulated...

That's was well articulate on he economy.

Starting to feel very sorry for some of the men out there. So they must work to ensure some income into the household, come home and do the housework as the wife wants freedom and hobbies. Even worse when the state is topping up the household income, welfare was never ever intended to let people do that so no wonder UC is cracking down so harshly.

Well then you've made a family decision kazoo, that your husband will work full time in an inflexible job while you don't work. That's a choice. Other people choose differently. Some couples choose lower waged work which allows more flexibility but has the downside of childcare costs.
Like I keep saying, no one wakes up to find they have several kids and a high earning husband who can't possibly drop hours. Their is a process which has led to that situation.

hows about the housewives dh,flexi-work,drop days to allow wife to work?
if you want a different model of working,start with your ow dh.he can do wifework
Allowing dw/dp to pursue,reestablish own career

Err Happy sahp contribute plenty to the pot.Many have paid shed lads in tax for years and support a partner also paying tax,often a lot.Finally the biggest contribution they make is to their children. Those of that do it do it to for the most important reason of all-the good of our children which is thus the biggest contribution we can make to society.

Whyis it harder to employ two people to jobshare than one

Because it costs more to the business....

Oncosts happynappies

I never said anything about drudgery. I have been a sahm so i do know about it. There is no drudgery now. By your account it's easy peasy.

Mirry2.

I am looking after my dd 9. She is home educated. She is following an autonomous route so we do lots of stimulating stuff, together, individually. We visit museums, galleries, libraries. We go to lunch time concerts, mainly orchestral and vocal. We travel the country visiting places of interest and usually tie it in with her or dh's performances. She is a very talented musician and plays in bands, orchestras and competitions. Dh is also a musician and travels the world, she hopes to join him when she is older. I enjoy study for my own interest, ancestry, I also play music so practice quite a bit.

The government would give us CB for 3 dc and give us tax relief for child care. How exactly would we be generating loads of money for the economy?

Without giving an economics 101... Cash Flow!