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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

MIL gave Dd a big present I hate, what to do?

134 replies

Mashedupbanana · 23/03/2013 18:30

Today MIL turned up with a present for our 2 yo Dd. it's a bright pink slide (dd's not seen it yet). I know I will sound really ungrateful but it really is not something that I would want to look at in the garden. My tastes are very different from MIL, I prefer more natural, creative, gender neutral, well constructed toys whereas MIL is quite the opposite - if it's plastic, flashes and pink she loves it. I think dd would probably enjoy going on the slide and that's the most important thing, but it's really not my kind of thing.

Realistically I dont want a plastic slide in the garden, but I have come to the conclusion that i'm just going to have to suck it up and have it. I don't like pink things like this as I think they look tacky and if we have a son next it is too gender specific. It doesn't matter with little things I can pack in a box but with a slide it's very visible. If i have to keep the slide, would I be unreasonable to ask if I can swap for it for the more neutral red one. At Christmas they wanted to buy her a pink trike and we gently suggested something else as we'd prefer to buy a balance bike, but I can see this coming up every time. What would you do?

OP posts:

LittleBairn · 23/03/2013 19:06

I'm quite mean I would send it home with MIL and tell her next time to consultant if she is going to buy a gift that takes up so much space.

MidnightMasquerader · 23/03/2013 19:09

I would really dislike this as well, especially in light of your recent post.

But unfortunately, I think there is very little you can do aside from expose it to the elements and hope it disintegrates sooner rather than later.

HazelnutinCaramel · 23/03/2013 19:14

Give your DD some paints and let her paint it. Will take away from the pinkness, it's creative & natural and if you get the right colours, it'll blend in to the garden better.

CandyCrushed · 23/03/2013 19:18

I think you should say thank you, she is trying to be nice. Buying a pink slide for the garden for you DD is a kind thing to do.

Plastic and pink is what most little girls and MIL's like. (Not PC but true!)

Keep the other issues seperate.

FrameyMcFrame · 23/03/2013 19:25

I don't agree.
I have 2 kids and a super tasteful garden with dens, masses of veg plots and little paths and no pink plastic....

Have you got a garage you can store it in and just get it out occasionally?

shockers · 23/03/2013 19:49

Stick it out there now... it'll be on the other side of the country by morning .

nokidshere · 23/03/2013 19:52

Who cares? Seriously? Its a present fgs and one that will be grown out of sooner than you think.

CombineBananaFister · 23/03/2013 20:04

I completely see where you're coming from as a mum who bought ridiculously expensive wooden toys and 'twee' cath kidston cowboy bedding and anything bloody swedish as they know best about childcare? and it looks cool. (i was temporarily that shallow )
BUT which toys did my Ds like best? the loud garish plastic tat from asda that nannan bought so do yourself A favour - if it's fun and she likes it, let her enjoy it, you can pick the adult stuff to your taste.
Incidentally, my 6 mth old did NOT give a shit about his beautiful bedding haha!

Bananasinfadedpjs · 23/03/2013 20:06

Slides are great fun for little ones. Sliding down, climbing up the wrong way, jumping off the steps, sending cars and balls down, and teddies and dolls and sand... Combine with a paddling pool in the summer for loads of entertainment.

Plastic ones are easy to wipe clean and light enough to move around the garden.

Get her a pair of waterproof trousers and she can play on it in all weathers, mine love sliding in the rain.

You could always grow some pink flowers in your garden to co-ordinate with the slide

b4bunnies · 23/03/2013 20:17

i think you should let your inlaws get whatever they like, to their taste, and you buy the things you like. you can put the garish things out of sight - plant a few more bushes.

zukiecat · 23/03/2013 20:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sokmonsta · 23/03/2013 20:44

Yabu. Dd had a pink slide until she outgrew it. Ds doesn't give a flying fig what colour it is as long as he can whizz/roll balls/cars down it. Leave it out and it will fade. Otherwise only have it out when they want to use it.

stargirl1701 · 23/03/2013 20:54

Sell it on eBay and buy a new slide?

Snazzynewyear · 23/03/2013 21:00

Or if it's from a big name store, take it back to your nearest one and ask if you can swap it for a red one. Then tell your MIL that a bit was missing when you opened the box, and the local store kindly exchanged it but only had red.

thebody · 23/03/2013 21:04

Ah your mil sounds generous and nice. Don't upset her over a temporary toy for the garden.

Your dd will love it.

I would love my dd to wear pretty boho clothes and she's gone out tonight in blue shorts, black tights, see thru red top with a white bandu, topped up with red converses.

I'd swap you the slide.

Original poster

Mashedupbanana · 23/03/2013 21:14

Generous and nice.. did you read update post

OP posts:

thezebrawearspurple · 23/03/2013 21:39

I have always mentioned how much I hate to much pink to people. Everyone knows that I like dd to have a wide spectrum of colours and toy mix so that she can make her own decisions about what she likes. Relatives and friends are happy to buy mostly non pink things, gender neutral and even boy stuff because they know a good mix is preferred. You have to mention it to people if it's a problem for you!!!!

MrsDeVere · 23/03/2013 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

quesadilla · 23/03/2013 21:49

A word of advice from someone who was raised by a pink phobe: kids home on it and tend to go the other way. My mum basically banned pink and it gave me a lifelong obsession with the colour. I totally get the ideological/gender conditioning issues and I sort of instinctively side with you but if you make too big a deal of it your dd will react and worship at the altar of all that is princessy and girly. Don't ban it - she will grow out of it and if you make a scene she will react.

WorraLiberty · 23/03/2013 21:50

I don't like pink things like this as I think they look tacky and if we have a son next it is too gender specific.

Oh yes, he'll catch the gays as soon as his bottom hits a pink slide.

MrsDeVere · 23/03/2013 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

shesariver · 23/03/2013 22:01

Such snobbiness in some of these posts, "tat", "shit" etc....its a chute that kids love to play on that's all. Glad I care more about my kids having fun in their own garden, rather than how aesthetically pleasing it looks.

shesariver · 23/03/2013 22:03

And I think mrsdevere has it spot on.

5eggstremelychocaletymadeggs · 23/03/2013 22:04

I dont much like pink but my ds3 loves it and now i have dd my mil.is going a bit mad with pink tat, every visit there are more bobbles and hair clips and little bags and toy necklaces and bracelets etc. The kids love it tho, esp ds3 and she means well. Dd would prefer anything dinosaur related!

We have a varietu if toys, pink, blue and more neautral. Some wooden amd some plastic. As long as the kids like them.its a good and i just try and be ruthless and donate to charity so we done get over run!

Dd was given a hideous baby annabel toy wardrobe full of dolls clothes. Big pink monstrositu but the boys love it and spend ages dressing the dolls, then dd takes a the clothes off again....

She was given my little ponies as well. She lines them all up and then gets the toy dinosaurs to come and eat them....

MyDarlingClementine · 23/03/2013 22:06

My Mil got us a huge orange and brown vile kicker thing - they lie on backs and kick and its like a million slot machines whizzing and lights flashing away, balls rolling, it was the whole of las vegas in one toy.

and it was so big. and so ugly. she didnt seem to like it. i hacve to admit it went into the loft.

by the way - my DD plays with any toys i can get her for free usually, so they are "boys" blue toys, girls pink, toys or any toys.

i have never mentioned gendery things to her, or pink or say the word - girly.

ie i havant made an issue of any of her toys to her - and cringe when people say " oh she plays with trains or cars" with us - she just plays regardless of colour.

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