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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder how people cope with more than two kids?

92 replies

discotequewreck · 13/03/2013 16:22

This isn't criticism but upmost respect.

I would like a third but I just don't know how it's possible.

It is all the school admin, homework, social activities you have to organise these days. I literally can't see how you fit another child in!

OP posts:

Annunziata · 13/03/2013 21:22

Pam, on Sundays my mum used to have us all for dinner. My (7) siblings were handed a baby each

steppemum · 13/03/2013 21:32

going form one to two was hard, but the third one just adds to the mix.

As to admin etc, I find once yo have more than one at school, you just need a very good calendar. As soon as letter arrives write it on calendar, have pile of letters (mine are pinned to board next to said calendar) waiting to be filled and returned.

I found with all things I had to get a system going once I had two, however informal. Third just slots in.

And dc1 is now 10, so is more and more independent

And our dc3 is the loveliest sunnyest, giggling bundle of fun, and our house would be much much less fun without her.

3 is great, more interesting and less settled than 2. Not so exhausting as 4 (and they all fit in a normal car)

imip · 13/03/2013 21:34

4 dds here and it's flipping' hard! Mine are still young though, between 1 and 6yo. Things that would greatly improve my life ATM is all kids sleeping through (I don't mind the odd broken night, I detest the constant feeding all night

steppemum · 13/03/2013 21:38

mine are all now at school (dc3 reception) and it gets lots easier once they all eat and sleep, use a toilet and can get dressed!

MayTheOddsBeEverInYourFavour · 13/03/2013 21:47

I have six

It's mostly pretty easy, but I do have an amazing husband and my mum is fab too which helps

What also helps is that they've all always slept really well and slept through early on, amazing what a difference not being tired can make! Had I had bad sleepers life would have been so much harder and I might have thought twice about having so many

DH would like more but I am done now

Yellowtip · 13/03/2013 21:51

I have eight and just cut corners all the time, but it's worked.

Sidge · 13/03/2013 21:53

Piece of piss.

Not.

(Well actually it is easier when they're older and more independent, out of nappies, can feed themselves etc)

deleted203 · 13/03/2013 21:55

I've got 5 and we live in cheerful chaos. The secret (I think) is to make it abundantly clear that in a big family you need to stand on your own two feet a bit - so if you have swimming on a Thursday, my dear, then you need to make sure you take your kit to school. Otherwise you won't be doing it. Similarly, you are responsible for your own HW - it was given to you, not me. And therefore you need to do it and hand it in on time. If you are struggling I will probably give absentminded answers if you care to do it at the kitchen table whilst I am cooking tea. Otherwise, you're on your own, matey.

DameSaggarmakersbottomknocker · 13/03/2013 21:57

Gin

deleted203 · 13/03/2013 22:01

Annunziata Like you, I think we're just used to big families. DH is eldest of 5 and I'm no 5 out of 8 kids.

poodletip · 13/03/2013 22:01

It's busy and requires organisation but it's not that hard. I don't know how people manage with more than 3 though ;)

IdreamofFairies · 13/03/2013 22:53

i have 6 only 5 at home now though and another due to leave home in sept.
1-2 was fine because there is only a year between them 2-3 was harder because there was a 4 year gap so had to get used to a baby again and fit baby around school run 3-5 no problem as 15m gap.
number 5 after 9 years was hard but my then 11 year old was a huge help and he really enjoyed helping out and doing things for the baby. teenagers are useless lol but at least they can more or less care from them selves number 6 again slotted it. i had mine in twos which i think really helped.
also the same as above if you have swimming them you take your kit remind about trips do own home work (always there to help if needed but its not my responsibility).

have found working part time makes me more organised everything goes in my work diary so much easier to have it all in one place.
i have brilliant family support so that helps as well.

McGilly · 13/03/2013 23:05

I have three. Cutting right back on outside activities helps a lot. And they take some of the pressure off by playing with each other. TBH I don't know how people cope with one child, which creates its own pressures! But yes, our house is a bit cluttered/messy and things don't always go smoothly ... Cuddling three needy kids at once is hard (not impossible though!) and three is a magic number.

McGilly · 13/03/2013 23:13

Chocolate and coffee help. A lot.

AmberSocks · 14/03/2013 04:33

I actually found 2 to 3 hardest ad i have 4 (aged 5,4,3 ad 5 months)2 is easy,you have to arms to hold them,2 knees to sit them o,you ca cuddle 2 babies at a time,but 3 was hard,but eve at the time i dont think i thought it was hard,its only now when i look back and think wow i had 3 babies in 2 years!

I dont work so i find it ok to be honest,also very laid back so a bit of mess doesnt bother me,the most important thing in my house is that they are kid to eat other ad we all eat nice food.

My husband goes to play snooker once a week and goes to watch football at weekends,i go to zumba once a week ad get saturday mornings off,i usually go ad get my hair or nails done or something,so that and after they go to bed is our me and together time.

AmberSocks · 14/03/2013 04:34

sorry for above post i have dodgy keys!

mathanxiety · 14/03/2013 05:04

You turn on the TV and let them at it. You turn a deaf ear to the squabbling and make them help a lot around the house. You get up at least half an hour before anyone else. When out with them all you spend your time doing headcounts.

Sowornout has it right I also have 5 children learn to get themselves together when there are a lot of them and parents get better more ruthless about their limits.

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