Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

So upset about a night out

70 replies

Belini · 06/03/2013 21:46

One of my good friends has offered to take me out for my birthday. She asked me about 7 weeks ago giving me plenty of notice to arrange babysitters & save a little cash.
Despite asking all my family & friends I have been unable to arrange anyone to watch even 1 of the dc .
I am sat here in tears. I don't ever ask people to babysit. I haven't been on a night out for over 2 years. I am a sp.

OP posts:

Original poster

Belini · 06/03/2013 22:06

I'm a bit worried about leaving a teen in charge of so many little ones.

OP posts:

Blondie1984 · 06/03/2013 22:07

Belini look on gumtree. - there are always babysitters advertising on ther

ballstoit · 06/03/2013 22:07

Are there any colleges which do childcare near you? Could find a student who has experience with little ones.

overmydeadbody · 06/03/2013 22:08

When I was 14 I had siblings the same age as your younger ones, and my parents left me in charge of them all sometimes, for a few hours.

There were no twins though, only one 18month old I guess twins is harder for a 14 year old to look after!

Blondie1984 · 06/03/2013 22:08

There even

Nospringflower · 06/03/2013 22:08

When is the night out and where in fife are you?

overmydeadbody · 06/03/2013 22:09

But would they all be asleep in which case the 14 ye old wouldn't be doing much? Or do they wake often?

Bluelightsandsirens · 06/03/2013 22:11

Does your 14 year old do their own thing?

Ask friends and family again and spread the remaining 4 children out ie one friend have the 7yr old and one family have the 6 year old and then arrange sitters.co.uk for the twins.

What time do the twins go to bed and what time do you want to go out? I found it easier to g out later once DC were sleeping but I only have 3.

Original poster

Belini · 06/03/2013 22:11

Sitters are out of my budget unfortunately. Blue this is why I was asking friends & family it is quite a handful. Although they are all good kids & are all bedded for 7:30.

OP posts:

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 06/03/2013 22:11

Surely there's an agency near you? With the 14yo for added security would you trust a babysitter from an agency?

ToomuchWaternotWine · 06/03/2013 22:12

I'm in north Aberdeenshire so about 2/3 hours from you. What's the date? If I can, I will drive down and babysit the twins, if you can put me up for the night (ill be fine on a sofa). I may even hold your hair back if you puke when you stagger in, as after 2 years not going out, you will be in a right state

Blondie1984 · 06/03/2013 22:13

I get that you are a sp but could their dad not watch them for the evening?

cece · 06/03/2013 22:14

I get one of the Nursery to babysit for me - do you know a nursery teacher or ta from school who would do it? Sometimes childminders will babysit too. However, having said that you will need to pay them.

pettyprudence · 06/03/2013 22:15

If you leave it til 8/9pm-ish to go out, could the 14yo not sit and watch the tv while they all sleep? Also, if you go out later, less chance of puking peaking to early

Original poster

Belini · 06/03/2013 22:18

My 14 yr old does his own thing & would be fine with the two middle ds. But I think it's too much responsibility for home to look after the twins. Although they all go to bed easily, Sod's law dictates that this would be the one night they would be up & down like yoyos! I will give it up as a failed attempt & try again maybe in a few months.

OP posts:

WellSlapMyThighAndCallMeNancy · 06/03/2013 22:20

Sorry to ask the obvious, but does their dad not help out? Sorry to hear you have to help, its a heart breaker when you plan to go out for the first time in years and the plans fail. It happens to me for different reasons.

aliasjoey · 06/03/2013 22:20

It sounds to me not so much the going out part, but the disappointment that none of your friends or relatives seemed willing to help out? Maybe they would have liked to help, but felt overwhelmed by the numbers, especially the twins? Perhaps if they were split up, relatives would agree...

Nospringflower · 06/03/2013 22:21

I'm in Edinburgh - when do you need someone?

WellSlapMyThighAndCallMeNancy · 06/03/2013 22:23

I love Mumsnet with the best of them but Im not sure Id be comfortable with someone plucked off here to look after my kids. Just when you think MN has a lovely bunch of women behind computer screens (which they do) a really odd troll/person comes along to remind you that not everyone is, present and correct. You just dont know what you're getting.

Original poster

Belini · 06/03/2013 22:41

Alias you hit the nail on the head. I should have been clearer I didnt ask any off them to watch all 4 little ones. I only asked each person to have one or two at the most. It is upsetting as I have had friends dc for sleepovers/tea so they can go out/work/sleep/veg out. I just thought as I never ask & I gave plenty of notice it wouldn't be a problem. That's sounds very entitled of me sorry.

OP posts:

bedmonster · 06/03/2013 22:44

Where are you OP? If youre surrey/Hants border way I can do it!!
Although I hear where you're coming from wellslap, but I am a totally trustworthy mother of 3!!
Feel for you belini though, sorry your family aren't more helpful.
Hope you and your friend manage a nice night in regardless, and maybe tap up a neighbours teenage niece/nephew/dc wanting to make a couple of pennies for the future.

bedmonster · 06/03/2013 22:48

Oh bless you, I don't think it sounds entitled at all, its upsetting but we have found that looking after 3 dc daunts people a whole lot more than 2. Though thankfully have a very supportive family who don't mind. I appreciate them.
Please look into nabbing someone local and trustworthy for future opportunities.

lurkedtoolong · 06/03/2013 22:54

Does your son have reliable friends who could help him? If he has one trustworthy friend that you know well and you know you could trust them both together is that an option?

doorbellringer · 06/03/2013 22:56

When is your night out?

Ledkr · 06/03/2013 23:03

My family never help either so I know how it feels. I sat in every new year when I was on my own while my mum went to bed.
I don't ask anymore.
My ds was 14 when he used to sit his baby sister but we are in a friendly neighbourhood with help nearby and I was just a phone call and quick taxi ride away. Could he have a mate to stay for moral support and go out late when they are all asleep leave plenty of munchies and non scary DVD and tell him to call you if any problems.
Would a neighbour be on call if you do this?

Flip

1 2 3