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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed with boyfriend/hungover phone off

20 replies

Alwaysasking · 02/03/2013 09:21

Bf went out last night, and as his texts became more incoherent it was clear he was wasted.

We'd arranged to take my ds swimming this morning, which ds (4) has been excited about for days. I told dp to make sure he was up and contactable this morning as he has a habit of getting drunk, phone dying and I can't get hold of him the next day (we don't live together).

And surprise surprise his fucking phone is off - I know he'll be passed out in bed. I can't take ds swimming on my own as the huge slide he goes on needs 2 of us to supervise him (one at top of slide, one at bottom, waiting for him). None of my friends are free, and ds wants me and dp to take him. I have to work this afternoon so can't leave later either.

AIBU to be utterly pissed off and sad for ds?

OP posts:
Isityouorme · 02/03/2013 09:24

Why are you wasting your time with this man? What a selfish twat. Is he the Dad? Take your DS swimming, he should be able to go up a slide when instructed with you at the bottom. Ask a lufeguard to help.

AThingInYourLife · 02/03/2013 09:25

YANBU to be pissed off.

What are you going to do about it?

LeaveTheBastid · 02/03/2013 09:25

YANBU. Still take your ds though, are there no lifeguards who could take him to the top of the slide? And if not, I'm sure you could still have fun without the slide. Life doesn't wait for the hungover, and it's not fair to completely let down your ds. Take him, and speak read the riot act to the bf later.

Original poster
Alwaysasking · 02/03/2013 09:28

No he's not ds' dad but may as well be, he's brought him up since he was 4 months old and they adore each other (which is why ds will be so upset he's not coming). I'm tempted to go to bf's and hammer on the door like a crazy person.

Ds will be a nightmare if I take him and don't let him go on the slide, that's all he wants to do, over and over again. Plus it will be heaving on Saturday. I'm furious!

OP posts:
livinginwonderland · 02/03/2013 09:57

that would piss me off, yanbu. he had a commitment to you (and more importantly, DS) and broke it. does he have a home phone you can harrass call him on? i would also do the door knocking thing if i knew it wouldn't come back on me! sounds very immature imo.

Wishihadabs · 02/03/2013 10:04

Oh fgs take the boy swimming. I am sure you can cope with 14 yo by yourself. Tell Ds bf is coming later (he might). Don't go and bang on his door, just do your own thing. Discuss it when nobody is hungover or angry. Have fun

Wishihadabs · 02/03/2013 10:05

That is one four year old not a fourteen year old obviously.

PedlarsSpanner · 02/03/2013 10:10

gosh yes just go swimming and let DS have a go at the slide on his own with you at the bottom.

why are you with this chap, he has Form from what you've told us

pictish · 02/03/2013 10:14

Agree that you should go without the bf, and let your son go down the slide with you at the bottom.

He's a let down. Don't be dependent on him. Be self sufficient.

Original poster
Alwaysasking · 02/03/2013 10:15

I'm still taking ds, getting ready now. Doesn't stop me being very pissed off though!

OP posts:
Wishihadabs · 02/03/2013 10:16

Go girl.

TheSecondComing · 02/03/2013 10:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wishihadabs · 02/03/2013 10:23

What tsc said

pictish · 02/03/2013 10:23

Good. You go! Grin

Deal with fucknugget later. He won't think he's done anything wrong. He'll think 'well you went swimming anyway so what's the problem?" and he will consider anything you say to him regarding his selfishness, is nagging. Probably.
If so...then I hate to say it, but your fella is a knobber.

Don't let the fact that he's done wrong spoil your good time with your son. xxx

Original poster
Alwaysasking · 02/03/2013 10:27

We live separately because we met at uni and have both just graduated, I stayed living with parents for the support while I did my degree.

But he has been a massive knob, just told ds dp is still asleep and he's accepted it. We're off now, thanks for your replies!

OP posts:
mrsjay · 02/03/2013 10:35

go swimming fgs leave him to his handover he let you down I would be livid but take your son swimming I am sure he can manage the slide if not somebody will help him up if he wants to go on it, dont go down the road of dissapointing your son cos his dad is an arse

mrsjay · 02/03/2013 10:36

oh you are taking him I must read on I was Angry for you have fun

SilverClementine · 02/03/2013 12:09

Hope you had a lovely time at swimming. Your boyf sounds like a knob, sorry Xx

Hissy · 02/03/2013 12:17

Exactly what does the word Partner mean in all this?

He's nothing of the sort.

Sort yourself out love, put your DS first and foremost and give this guy the heave ho.

What would your DS learn fromhim? Nothing worthwhile by the looks of it!

Well done you for carrying on with the swimming tho! (((hug)))

akaemmafrost · 02/03/2013 12:24

My ex was a let down wanker like this. I made it my concrete policy that my dc were never affected by it. If it had been planned, we went and left him to his own devices. Glad you are taking ds Smile.

Sadly, I was and still am to a certain extent stuck with it as he is the dc's dad. I would not put up with this for a second from anyone else.

If this is a first then roast him, if he does it again dump. If not a first then DUMP. And I know it's easy for me to say but I HAVE dumped for less.

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