To feel to feel a bit jealous

[Stelmosfire]

When my BF visits his children in ex,s house and spends time with them there, she is there too.

He hates me feeling uncomfortable about it and we always fall out. I trust him but for some irrational reason I feel shut out. Also he thinks I'm not trusting him if I ask him questions about his plans for the day. Am I the only woman who would not like this because he makes me feel like I'm being totally unreasonable

Thank you all so much for your comments, it has given lots to think about.

He has actually asked me to spend time there also and I have on a couple of occasions though not for a whole day. I just feel a bit awkward there and I don't know why I'm just uncomfortable. I don't want to make things difficult and I wish I could be as laid back as everyone else involved seems to be .

Actually I think I have Sussed out the reason I feel the way I do. It's because I am unsure of his feelings for me he doesn't always treat me kindly especially when I most need it. This causes me to think he may not actually love me and it makes me wonder how he treated his ex, I'd love to ask her but obviously I can't

If he doesnt treat you very kindly, especially at your most vulnerable, then you problem isnt his time spent at his ex's is it?

Forget that issue for a minute. Do you want to be with man if he can treat you like that? What if you get seriously ill (it could happen to any of us), could you rely on him to be there for you?

I think the way he is towards me at times is exactly the thing that has caused my jealousy. It's made me insecure because I'm not 100per cent sure he truly loves me.

When it benefits him he will be very loving and reassuring but then on other occasions its like he just doesn't want to know if I've got a problem I just want to sound off about, even though its not about him. He,l start raising his voice till eventually I just get off the phone.

It's feeling like he can only hack the relationship if its all hunky Dory and can't be bothered with the problems. I feel so lonely at times

I still can't get over the fact that he only sees his children every other week :(

He sounds like an arse to be honest, id leave now before you get hurt he doesn't sound like a very nice man

He would dearly love to see them more.

But yes he can be an arse at times to me anyway

how long have you been together? I don't think hes a keeper.

Lucy a lot of men only seem their children every other week. My ex does because his work means he couldnt see them in the evenings and we have one weekend each with them. That doesnt make him an arse. The rest of his behaviour however, does.

see not seem!

Ime every other weekend contact is the norm.

Sock - thats really sad :( But im not judging, maybe im a bit niave as to the amount of effort men would put in to see their kids, i do recognise that it is difficult.

I guess bogey the OPs BF falls into a similar category to your ex - the lack of contact doesn't make him an arse (as you say, it can't be helped) but his other behaviour definately does.

Yes it's the distance, work shifts and costs that make it difficult for my BF, he would be there every week iif he could.

LUCY we,ve been together 2yrs