To think you don't let your toddler play with noisy electic games on a packed train?

[Hammy02]

Or any train for that matter. I was on jam packed train at the weekend (no spare seats, aisle full of people standing up) and one woman was sat with her small child playing with a toy that said 'triangle', 'square' etc when the kid pressed each shape. I was a couple of seats in front & could hear it! AIBU to think this was utterly selfish of the mum? Other people were giving her the evils but she seemed oblivious.

It is partly about the phrase

Errrrrrrm - wasn't lotta pointing out the wrongness of 'my bubble, my rules' as a mindset NOT advocating it??

Which would mean you actually all agree with her...

Yes I should add that I think 'my bubbles, my rule' is a pile of cack as it happens, people should consider others feelings, of course but this is restricted to what each individual considers to be their rules therefore impossible for everyone/anyone to get it right for anyone else.

Well she must want her own bubble, no?

Ok, I guess I wasn't clear enough, with the 'my bubble my rules'. It means the opposite to what you think it does.

Example - when I'm out in public, I try to allow other people to get past, I don't play music out loud, I don't sniff constantly, I don't eat stinky food on buses, I don't smoke near people if at all possible. That's because I'm aware that I'm in a shared space and don't want to inflict my bad habits/noise on others. People who think 'my bubble my rules' do the opposite - they treat everywhere like their own front room and expect people to accommodate their behaviour. I'm thinking of people who eat hot food on buses, blow smoke all over others, barge past people without saying excuse me, swear loudly, spit at other people's feet, play music out loud etc etc.

Make more sense?

'Errrrrrrm - wasn't lotta pointing out the wrongness of 'my bubble, my rules' as a mindset NOT advocating it??'

Thanks woozlebear, glad it's not just me

It made sense before lotta, but it definitely should now!

YABVU.

I wouldn't put a mother keeping her child entertained on a train into the same category as anything else you mentioned.

Some people just moan for the sake of it.

Miserable sods.

That might have been what Lotta intended, reading back, but by suggesting that the child should be kept quiet with something quiet, then actually she is advocating the bubble rule.

I still think it's a crock of shit.

Exactly, her bubble is more important than someone elses bubble, obviously.

I would glare at someone with noisy electronic toys OR noisy electronic mobile phones. Regardless of age. I dislike other passengers equally when they make unnecessary noise

'I wouldn't put a mother keeping her child entertained on a train into the same category as anything else you mentioned. '

It's not the 'entertaining', it's the noise factor.

'Some people just moan for the sake of it.

Miserable sods.'

Moaning is my number one hobby usualsuspect, how did you guess? You on the other hand sound like a little ray of sunshine, I bet you're super accommodating of everyone you come into. Well maybe apart from me

You still don't seem to understand it Fenton - that's a shame. I recommend reading 'Talk to the Hand' - it's a great book and I'm sure Lynne Truss explains it better than I can.

But isn't the mother's behaviour, by choosing a noisy toy rather than a quiet one, saying that her bubble is more important then anyone else, to use your expression, usual. Although I think the very idea of lots of competing bubbles is innately a misunderstanding of the point - the point is that we DON'T exist in bubbles, everything we do in public impinges on other people, and to act as if you DO exist in a bubble is inconsiderate.

Hmm my intention was not to start WWIII by airing my opinions on this topic.

The way I see it is, sometimes children need to learn there is a time and place for certain things. Just the same as unruly teenagers shouting obscenities at each other (no, I don't mean on this thread I mean on trains lol), or grown up talking loudly about their sex lives on their phones in public.
I fully understand that if it has been a long journey for the child and they get restless and tired, so is a noisy toy going to soothe them?
theoneandonlyalpha that's lovely that your ds likes noisy toys and is well behaved, it really is. If he's so well behaved am I right in thinking there is no need to take noisy toys out with you on public transport?
Just because someone likes something it doesn't mean to say it is appropriate to time and place. Just like the little girl I describe in previous post who was allowed to roll around on the floor of a hospital ward. Would you allow that just because they like it I wonder?

But that's just me. We are all different. If we were the same things would be boring wouldn't they? Regardless we are entitled to air our opinions and on this subject I agree with OP.

I am surprised how many people think YABU.

The mother could have taken a quieter toy for the child to play with. Yes, I understand how hard it is to keep a child quiet.

I really hate how noisy the world is becoming. It's totally socially acceptable to play music so loud through your earphones that everyone can hear. Or have a half hour phone conversation.

The worst thing is that on quiet carriages there is still always one knobhead being loud and I'm always the one that has to tell them to STFU.

meh

It's better than having a bored, squirmy or even screaming child. I et more annoyed with parents who do nothing to ensure that kids are entertained on long journeys.

I am accommodating where small children are concerned ,yes.

A bit of understanding and not so much tutting and cats bum faces goes a long way I find.

Better than the kid on my train last night who'd been given a can of silly string . It was all up the aisle!

Yes, woozlebear that's how I see it. It's just a basic lack of consideration for other people. I really try to not get in people's way, not make too much noise, generally be polite and it annoys me when others don't do the same.

It's quite tricky to balance this idea of people being allowed to act how they like with the idea that others shouldn't be impinged upon.

I've been in the position of having to choose between a tantruming child or letting her have a noisy(ish) toy on a packed train before. Which would you have preferred?

Or, you could pack QUIET toys / things with headphones. You don't have to pack anything noisy.

And yes, I own my YABU. I'm mother to 2 of the 1 in 100 kids who are not neurotypical. You can't tell they're not neurotypical at first glance. If we had to take DS2 on a train, once the novelty of it's train-ness wore off, it owuld probably take a noisy toy, like his leapster, to dissuade him from running up and down the carriage and shrieking.