Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset at being called a selfish cunt at a concert?

270 replies

TheDarkSideOfTheSpoon · 27/01/2013 10:17

Just got back from a concert in town and although it was fantastic it was spoiled for us a bit. I'm sure IANBU, but perhaps need some perspective.

Friend and I had seats at the end of a row, in the back corner of the arena so looking diagonally towards the stage, next to us was a woman perhaps in her late 70s/early 80s which was a bit surprising, we'd expected more to be with our own age group but other than being mildly surprised we didn't give it a second thought.

Half way through the concert, friend and I are happily stood up dancing and cheering like the majority of people there and a woman leans over from a few seats above & behind us and yells "you do know you two are the only ones stood up in this section don't you, why don't you sit down so other people can see" in a very aggressive tone. We said we're sorry but this is a music concert, strange as it is that this particular section seems to be filled with boring old farts people not wanting to dance actually 95% of the arena are on their feet. She yelled again that this poor woman next to us couldn't see and we ended up having a row where we explained our reasons for standing and she called us various names and eventually left. We felt a bit uneasy then but not sure what to do, our enjoyment would be spoiled by having to stop dancing/waving/cheering but of course not wanting the lady next to us to have her night spoiled either. We offered her our aisle seat to sit in so she would be in front of us and our standing wouldn't get in her way but she turned it down so we tried to get over the row and enjoy ourselves.

Ten minutes later the other woman comes back, on her way to the toilet passed behind us and yelled "I hope you're having a good time you selfish pair of cunts!" before stomping off. We were Shock and tbh a bit upset. Didn't retaliate, so hopefully retained the mythical moral high ground but still it took away from an otherwise good night.

What would you have done? We paid the same as everyone else, we went there looking forward to dancing and jumping about as is usual at concerts, almost everyone else was, if the older lady couldn't stand then there were disabled seats available but she had booked a standard seat. We did offer her ours but she turned it down and from what we could see everyone else could have stood up if they chose. We weren't allowed to move and stand anywhere else. AIBU?

OP posts:
SoWhatIfImWorkingClass · 27/01/2013 18:14

I'll admit it is annoying when you're trying to see and the people in front are standing.

But calling someone a cunt is not on. Well done you for not retaliating when she spewed that out to you!

Original poster
TheDarkSideOfTheSpoon · 27/01/2013 18:29

Ah barred I knew there'd be those who think I WBU for going to a Ronan concert in the first place! Wink

OP posts:
AlistairSim · 27/01/2013 18:34

I hadn't realised there was such a thing as sitting down at a concert until I met DP. He took me to see Richard Thompson and everyone sat so politely.
It was a whole new adult world!

Alisvolatpropiis · 27/01/2013 18:39

Yabu.

You were selfish and also...how do you manage to dance to Ronan Keating? Confused

I've been to lots of concerts. Most are seated these days. Some everyone has ended up standing,in others most have sat apart from the odd few pissed up twats.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 27/01/2013 18:42

Last concert I went to it wasn't the standing that was the problem, it was the fighting.

wasn't Ronan Keating.

everlong · 27/01/2013 18:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MoominmammasHandbag · 27/01/2013 19:07

I have been to tons of gigs and enjoyed dancing and jumping around. But these days I'm a disabled old gimmer and only go to a gig if I have a seat. Yeah I would probably been pissed off by people dancing in front of me but I have in my more active past been to seated only gigs and been very frustated at not being allowed to dance so I kind of get what the OP is saying.
My most annoying gig experience was actually at Cambridge folk festival when I swallowed my pride and went in the disabled enclosure. It was very rowdy and distracting.

But taking everything into consideration, going to see Roland Keating means you probably deserve all the abuse you got OP.

MoominmammasHandbag · 27/01/2013 19:09

everlong your level of empathy is astonishing.

everlong · 27/01/2013 19:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TotallyBS · 27/01/2013 19:15

everlong- sitting down at concerts IS for stiffs AND for people in the OP who are in their late 70s or early 80s Grin

MoominmammasHandbag · 27/01/2013 19:17

everlong Hmm

Hulababy · 27/01/2013 19:20

I would never consider standing in a seated area as being bad practise or selfish. Every concert I have ever been too has had most people stood up, even in seating areas.
I have had people stand in front of me at concerts - I just stand too.

The OP offered to swap seats with the lady - she could have taken up the offer if it was bugging her so much.

We were allowed to stand at MEN btw, everyone was stood, inc the seating area.

Wallison · 27/01/2013 19:20

I don't think the woman who called the OP a cunt was in her 70s - wasn't she just some burger-faced harridan behind who was spoiling for a fight?

Tindertree · 27/01/2013 19:21

I'm always glad when a venue encourages those with seats to sit down. It's not so bad if it's right near the end, but sometimes I just don't want to stand for a whole gig - no matter how good it is.

MariusEarlobe · 27/01/2013 19:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GozerTheGozerian · 27/01/2013 19:24

Standing tickets are usually first to sell out, if they exist, so plenty of people have to buy seats instead. FGS it's a concert. You HAVE to assume that a good proportion of the audience are going to want to spend at least some of the time on their feet, dancing, waving their arms in the air, whatever. It goes with the territory.

If you need to sit, and you aren't able or don't want to stand, then you need to make sure you buy seats which won't be affected by people in front - at the front of a section, or at the end of a row so you're by the aisle. Venues with seats pretty much always have a seating plan and there are usually lots of seats that fit this description, especially in an arena.

I get that sometimes gigs sell out fast, and you might not get much choice, in which case either accept people might dance in front of you, or talk to the stewards. They always keep seats back and might move you - we've done this before when seated up in the gods. You don't mouth off and swear at people who are just having fun AND have offered to move to accommodate people.

OP, YANBU at all, don't know what else you could have done really other than sit on your hands and enviously watch everyone else rocking out to Ronan Wink

MmeGuillotine · 27/01/2013 19:27

I KNEW it would be the Ronan gig last night. Someone I know was there and posted a picture to Facebook of the view from her seat - I was a bit surprised to see that it was all seated. She reported back that she had an 'amazing night' though so I don't think she called anyone a cunt. ;)

GozerTheGozerian · 27/01/2013 19:27

PS been to countless gigs at the MEN and there are ALWAYS lots of people standing in the seating areas. Never seen anyone asked to sit.

ShellyBoobs · 27/01/2013 19:28

YABU to have been at a Ronan Keeting concert in the first place.

Grin
GetOrf · 27/01/2013 19:28

Bloody hell at the people moaning about 'some tall twat' in front of them. What are tall people supposed to do? Shrink?

Hulababy · 27/01/2013 19:30

I am only 5 foot. I also have arthritis, and one of the joints affected is my knee. It is painful to stand for a long length of time on a hard surface. However I go to concerts and I expect to not really be able to see much, regardless of if I have standing or seated tickets. If I stand I can't see over the tops of other people who are standing. If i stand I can;t see over standing people - and in some venues not over the tops of sitting people. But i still go. I stand and sit alternatively. I enjoy the atmosphere. I enjoy the music. I enjoy the dancing.

I do think people are expecting too much to go to a pop or rock concert and expect everyone to be sat in their chair politely nodding along. It's just not the type of place you get that surely?

Maybe they just need one sitting only and no standing at all block at each venue!

FutTheShuckUp · 27/01/2013 19:31

Im chuckling at the prospect of anyone managing to dance to Ronan Keating. It must have been that Grange Hill one step two step dance

Wallison · 27/01/2013 19:35

I think someone should have a word with all of those selfish bastards in the Arena at the Proms.

TotallyBS · 27/01/2013 19:36

Just reread the OP. The woman shouts out that the OP and friends are the only ones in the section standing. The OP doesn't dispute this.

The OP then says that 95% of the arena is standing.

I wonder if the 5% sitting is in front of the OP and the other 95% is standing coz they can see over the dancing heads of the OP and friends Grin

TotallyBS · 27/01/2013 19:38

.... they can't see ...

Swipe left for the next trending thread