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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to tell my colleague ive got feelings for him?

77 replies

emilysheart · 25/01/2013 21:55

I've realised i have got feelings for someone i work with.he's with someone but he has made it known to me that he's not happy in the relationship and i have had signal from him in the past that maybe he likes me. he is moving to another department soon so if i tell him now an he laughs in my face at least i won't have to face him on a daily basis. if i don't say anything i think i might regret it

OP posts:
Original poster
emilysheart · 25/01/2013 22:59

exactly Agent. i want him to know before he goes. don't know really maybe I've read him wrong we had a really long hug last week and it just felt right somehow

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:00

pathetic

LesBOFerables · 25/01/2013 23:03

Nice married men don't give vulnerable women long meaningful hugs. I think that being "in a bad place" is screwing with your twat radar.

PickledInAPearTree · 25/01/2013 23:06

don't you think you deserve better?

AgentZigzag · 25/01/2013 23:06

There's nothing wrong with having feelings for someone else.

The problem is if you build it up to be more than it actually is in your head, which is easily done if you're not feeling great at the minute, and it's all quite ambiguous with lots of room to fill in the gaps with imagined what ifs.

I'm sure if that hug meant anything at all he would have picked up on how you felt, and like I said, he'll know where to find you and you wouldn't want him at this moment in time anyway.

Original poster
emilysheart · 25/01/2013 23:11

he's not married but might as well be they have 3dc he has told me he would never marry her maybe because of the cheating i don't know he's a good man trying to do the right thing by his dcs so that is for me to keep out of i guess. im not vulnerable..or pathetic thank you. you're right Agent thanks i won't do anything

OP posts:
GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 25/01/2013 23:15

Stay away OP, no good can come of this. You'll only regret not telling him because in your head it will go well with him leaving his family for you. That's not how it end in real time.

LesBOFerables · 25/01/2013 23:19

I took 'in a bad place' to mean vulnerable.

PickledInAPearTree · 25/01/2013 23:22

I did too Emily - I would be concerned at any friend in real life who was,considering getting involved in this. it would be a massive shower of shit as you say.

Original poster
emilysheart · 25/01/2013 23:26

not in a bad place in general just not in a good place to be doing anything serious. don't think I've got a big enough umbrella

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:27

yes, it would be simply awful for you, wouldn't it ?

WorraLiberty · 25/01/2013 23:35

Can anyone hand me a life jacket?

I seem to be drowning in a sea of drip feeding

YAB more U with every post you make OP.

AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:37

< chucks worra a life jacket >

SomethingProfound · 25/01/2013 23:38

Don't tell him!

He is in a relationship end of.

Regardless of your feelings for him or if "it feels right" he is in a serious relationship with someone else, if the relationship is that bad it will end then feel free to get it off your chest.

TBH I can't believe you would even consider making a play for a man with kids and a long term partner. Disgusting behaviour!

WorraLiberty · 25/01/2013 23:42

It's yellow AF

Yellow!

Do you have anything a bit more stylish?

AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:42

Yellow is the new orange, I believe

Beggars can't be choosers, you know

Original poster
emilysheart · 25/01/2013 23:44

not as awful as happening across you AnyFucker you're not his cheating dw that he doesn't love are you?
ive said i won't do anything how is that BU?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 25/01/2013 23:46

How can AF be the cheating wife if he's not errmm...you know married??

PickledInAPearTree · 25/01/2013 23:47

it's all very very wrong this, even the life jacket.

AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:48

You're a lovely person, aintcha, OP?

A proper angel in disguise

deep disguise

and your skanky wannabe boyfriend isn't married anyway, didn't you say ?

you're not telling porkies are you now, OP ?

PickledInAPearTree · 25/01/2013 23:50

how do you know his wife is cheating?

and if she is why hasn't he left?

all very dubious

AnyFucker · 25/01/2013 23:50

I was going to throw worra a rope, but it sounded a bit bad-mannered

PickledInAPearTree · 25/01/2013 23:53

worra is bobbing about in a sea of shite poor girl.

Original poster
emilysheart · 25/01/2013 23:53

as lovely as you are Any. he isn't skanky i would say its his oh that is skanky cheating on him while he is working all hours.anyway like i said not my business so i will leave it

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 25/01/2013 23:54

Excuse me but especially the life jacket Hmm

I think I'd rather the rope to be honest...except it seems the OP has it right now.