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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be bewildered by folk who claim that motherhood has made it impossible to go to the loo alone? Why?

302 replies

Snog · 25/01/2013 19:32

What ridiculous nonsense is this?
Just
go
to the loo
alone

OP posts:
Mollydoggerson · 25/01/2013 19:56

BREAKING NEWS:

Not all babies/toddlers are the same.

Some are more clingy (maybe due to being bad teethers/illness) and go bonkers if the primary caarer goes out of their sight.

TurdusMerula · 25/01/2013 19:56

Op, WIBU to be bewildered by your being happy to listen to your child howl and bang while you curl one out?
Yes: it's unreasonable (and oddly ignorant) not to realise that different mothers have different priorities and preferences.

Snog · 25/01/2013 19:57

But some women claim that a key benefit of going to work is being able to go to the loo alone.
Honestly people, if it matters to you, just do it.
Believe me you don't need to go out to work to achieve this

OP posts:
Fakebook · 25/01/2013 19:57

My five year old follows me to the loo and now her brother has started following too. They both set up camp outside the bathroom playing/screaming/shouting. You cant stop them following, they're like little annoying ducklings.

Tweasels · 25/01/2013 19:57

I'd rather have her in the bathroom happy than screaming at the stairgate making me hurry. I like to shit in peaceful surroundings.

I think more fool her if she'd rather endure the smell of shit roses than sit downstairs on her own.

When DS was a toddler he'd be more than happy left alone. They're all different aren't they.

BertieBotts · 25/01/2013 19:57

Episodes 2 and 3

(And four and five if you click through...)

VerlaineChasedRimbauds · 25/01/2013 19:59

Ah, the memories of a small person needing to tell me things that were really very very important RIGHT NOW. I did manage to go to the loo alone but, just in case I had forgotten she was there, DD used to waggle her fingers under the door and sing to me Grin.

ceeveebee · 25/01/2013 19:59

I've never taken either of my twins to the toilet with me. I also manage to shower while they

scottishmummy · 25/01/2013 20:00

they open door,crawl,scream or march in
figure it will stop by 12
else I'll be worried

ceeveebee · 25/01/2013 20:02

Shower while they play in the nursery. Never miss a meal either.
Also on bath nights I bath one twin while the other plays alone.
Run the risk of a flaming here but seriously I think some people make a rod for their own back by never leaving their DCs alone for 5 minutes

Bunbaker · 25/01/2013 20:02

"What do those of you who go to the loo alone do with your toddlers while you do so?"

I put her in the playpen or her cot. When she was very small we didn't have a downstairs toilet. We had very steep stairs as well so we had stair gates, so when she was a little older I could put her in front of the TV while I nipped upstairs. So I never had the problem of her banging on the door, which I would find very off putting.

She has always understood that going to the toilet is a private matter so it was never an issue for me.

edam · 25/01/2013 20:03

You think toddlers insisting on coming into the loo with you is bad... on New Year's Eve at my sister's, some neighbours set fireworks off. Her great big alsation-sized dog panicked and rushed to his Mummy - who was in the loo. And a bit startled by having several stones worth of dog bursting through the door and trying to climb onto her lap. Grin

(He's a very dependent/attached dog, she got him from a rescue; he'd been abandoned by previous owners. But still, you'd think he'd let his mistress have a pee in peace!)

Snog · 25/01/2013 20:03

Look ceeveebee can manage with twins
Honestly people you need to give this up

OP posts:
NicolaSeven · 25/01/2013 20:04

YABU! I leave the door open to make sure the toddler isn't braining the baby. And the baby is so desperate to get the loo brush and other Forbidden Things that the chink of bog seat is a siren call for her.

scottishmummy · 25/01/2013 20:05

I do agree child doesn't need be be velcroed to to you 24-7
there lies folly.don't skip meals etc cause can't put baby down.
easier when wee baby as plonked in cot went for long shower

MsVestibule · 25/01/2013 20:05

But some women claim that a key benefit of going to work is being able to go to the loo alone. Erm, Snog I think they're joking.

Hmm, benefits of returning to work after maternity leave.

  1. Financial benefits; meh.
  2. If I don't, I won't be able to get back in at my current level; not really that fussed.
  3. I'll be able to go to the loo by myself; hell yeah, that's a critical one, when shall I go back?
HoneyDragon · 25/01/2013 20:06

What do you do in public toilets?

TurdusMerula · 25/01/2013 20:06

I'd suspect that those who say it's a key benefit of being back at work are probably speaking in a tongue-in-cheek way, and perhaps metaphorically: they mean that the relative civilisation of their working environment comes as a pleasant relief after the vicissitudes of life with a clingy baby/toddler.

And no-one who says it's impossible is speaking literally, just as those who say their baby is unputdownable really mean that it's just not worth the screaming/going purple/being sick that would ensue, rather than that the baby is some sort of supernatural phenomenon.

(So I think YABU!)

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 25/01/2013 20:07

I don't really care if I 'make a rod for my own back' it only takes a second for something to happen when they are little and if it did you can never take back those few moments when they could have easily come with you, my 11yo doesn't follow me in now so they do grow out of it eventually.

QuietNinjaTardis · 25/01/2013 20:08

Biscuit for you op

IAmLouisWalsh · 25/01/2013 20:09

I lock the door. Doesn't stop DS2 banging on it yelling 'what are you doing? Is it a wee or a poo? A wee or a poo Mummy? I NEED to see. Let me see'.

It puts you off a bit...

newbielisa · 25/01/2013 20:10

Snog maybe your poo really stinks ...... Like your superior tone. Just a thought.

scottishmummy · 25/01/2013 20:10

op is of course right, but still I love bit hyperbole
some folk take the can't take eyes off em for second too far

BertieBotts · 25/01/2013 20:10

Grin Visions of turdus with a baby superglued to her arm saying "Help! Help! It won't come off!"