Loquace havent you seen the daytime TV advert
No, blimming Italian telly not selling me vaggie things. Although, not true actually now I think of it, an alarming amount of Italian women appear to have a terrible urge to inform all their freinds with 
face that they can't go for an appertivo, cos their fluffy bits itch. Then freinds take them to the chemist, a tube of pink cream dances, and everybody smiles and drinks digusting flavoured horrible non alcoholic orange coloured shit in celebration.
Oh and there is special fluffy bits soap called "Chilly", which I find a bit off putting as a name actually.
Don't panic! I just bideted them. Have got some standards 
Why do people bleach their bums? Well it got popular in porn from what I hear. So the bum blends in with the rest of the skin tones.
I point blank refuse to go into doggy style for a beutician. And that is before we add the chemicals to anus issues I harbour.
I tell you what, don't envy beauticians these days. Images of relaxing facials replaced with the world shoving their bumhole at you so you can flay it with wax and then give it a nice chemical burn.
Dear God, just five minutes ago we were burning our bras and now we are frying our anuses, chopping off our butterflies and blowing our boobies up to massive proportions.
I think a wrong turn was taken somewhere.