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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how long you were with DH/DP before they proposed?

136 replies

Croccy1979 · 02/01/2013 15:14

I've had a couple of friends who've done it very quickly recently! Good for them
Just wondering what's average? Guess it depends on age.....

OP posts:
BackforGood · 02/01/2013 15:46

I don't think there'll be an 'average' - every answer will be very individual.
No exciting story here - in fact, can't really remember dh proposing as such, we just knew we wanted to be together and started talking about when we should set the date for the wedding. We married 3 years after we met, so I guess we were engaged about 2 yrs after we met.

FlojoHoHoHo · 02/01/2013 15:50

I've been engaged twice, once at 16, engaged after 2 months, married 6 months later and divorced by 20.
The second time I got engaged after 3 years, booked the wedding, plans starting to take shape then I found him in bed with OW.

WillieWaggledagger · 02/01/2013 15:51

8 years and counting! We will get married I expect but not ready for proposals yet - when we first got together we were teenagers so we're only just getting to a stage in our lives where we would actually consider getting married

MeconiumHappens · 02/01/2013 15:54

9 years. i was only 18 when we met though and we wanted to get careers established/buy a house etc first. From whats happeneing around me it seems to be the older you are the quicker you crack on, perhaps you know what you want/biological clock ticking etc.

weegiemum · 02/01/2013 15:54

We got together at Easter 1990, I was19, he was 20.

He proposed in Jan 1993, we were both 23.

Married Dec 1994, we were both 24. We only moved in after the wedding (good christian kids!)

Married 18 years at the weekend just past!

beamme · 02/01/2013 15:54

Engaged after a year (I was 21), married 18 months later. We have been married 10 years now and still going strong.

Groovee · 02/01/2013 15:55

4 weeks, been together nearly 16 years, married for 14 and a half with 2 children.

Yoghurty · 02/01/2013 15:58

I rang my friend after the first date with my DP and told her I'd met the man I was going to marry.

That was 6.5 years ago and he proposed last week on Christmas Day SmileSmileSmileSmile

GregBishopsBottomBitch · 02/01/2013 16:01

2 and a half years, split 6 months later.

My 28 yr old bestie has been with her dp nearly 8 years, no proposal yet.

MulledWineAndScully · 02/01/2013 16:04

2 months, and it was only about the 8th time we'd seen each other (long distance relationship).

He's a serial proposer though. I do wish he'd waited longer - I still remember his mother's reaction when we told her and I will never forgive!

yfuwchhapus · 02/01/2013 16:05

17 months and then married 12 months after that!! I was 19 and he was 31. Just had our 10 year anniversary!! And we have 2 beautiful DC!

IwantaPetFox · 02/01/2013 16:05

I don't think there will be an average either. It all depends what stage of life you're at doesn't it? DH proposed to me when we'd been together for 5 years, and we were 27. If we'd been 38 I might have been impatient and thought 5 years was far too long, but at 27 I was completely shocked and not expecting it at all.

My DF proposed to my DM after 3 months and they were married within 9 months - he was 34 and she was 24 and they've been happily married for 36 years now!

susanann · 02/01/2013 16:08

ONE WEEK! yeah I know its crazy but it feels so right. We are not young and dewy eyed either! Im 52 and hes 51. Met April 2012 and moved in with him in August 2012, wedding is May 2013. We are so happy. I know my family were worried at first, understandably. But now they know him theyre happy with the situation. Was previously married for 17 years.

MTBMummy · 02/01/2013 16:08

Met DP in 2000, started dating in 2001, got engaged last year - so just over 10 years, not set a date yet for getting married, but probably in the next few years.

Not one to rush things - should caveat this is the second time round for both of us.

GleamingHeels · 02/01/2013 16:11

17 days from first meeting to proposal, married a year later, still together twenty-five and a half years later

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 02/01/2013 16:11

Seven years. We've beeb together since we were 18 though. Also, I had told him quite early on that if he ever wanted to propose, to do it when he was ready to marry not promise to marry - I don't like the idea of short engagements.

Btw I wasn't fussed whether he would ask or not - would quite happily see out our days together unmarried!

Amothersruin · 02/01/2013 16:13

We were together 4 years before we got engaged and only then it was because I threatened to dump him. 2 of our friends had got engaged and wed in the time it took us to get engaged.

Took a further 3 years for us to wed and again I indicated that if we didnt we would split. We will have been married 11 years this year.

Softlysoftly · 02/01/2013 16:13

Moved in the day we met. Married 10 years later, wouldn't want to commit too soon Grin.

17th anniversary this year!

GwendolineMaryLacey · 02/01/2013 16:15

3 months in. He says he knew after a couple of weeks but thought he'd better hold off for a while. 13 years this year :)

shartsi · 02/01/2013 16:20

4 months, got married a year later.

diddl · 02/01/2013 16:25

Met March 1993
Engaged Jan 1994
Married July 1995

nillynoon · 02/01/2013 17:12

Together 15 months, then engaged 15 months. Pregnant 10 months later

KitCat26 · 02/01/2013 18:05

First time was after four years with my ex fiance. I was 21. The minute he proposed I knew it wasn't right, took me another 18mths to grow some and split though.

Second time was after two years. I was 24. We married 11 months after that. And it definitely felt 'right'.

BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM · 02/01/2013 18:14

2 weeks.

He dumped me 6 weeks later (during this period I had been planning the wedding, he had been encouraging me to do so Blush).

He was a nobhead and I was recovering from a breakdown/depression and on high dose of anti-depressants.

I'm so ridiculously sensible normally, my family all had a permanent Shock on their face and just sat back and waited for the inevitable.

Clayhead · 02/01/2013 18:17

He's never proposed but we've been married 13 years.