To Be Annoyed about this (Poss SN) Childs Behaviour

[fantasticfanjo]

Ok so we went to The Panto last night which wasn't a cheap night out with the tickets costing £100 + for 4 of us.

We were sat 4 seats in with a family of 4 occupying the end 4.

The Father of other the family preceded to lift his DS aged about 10/11 over the seats (spare) to the row in front so he could get a better view and was now sat directly in front of my DP.

This child then spent the entire performance jumping up and down on the seat in front,shouting loudly for sweets,flapping arms,banding his head with his shoes which he'd taken off and generally distracting everyone around him. To give the father credit he did repeatedly tell the child to shut up /sit down and threaten him etc.

Although My experience of ASD is quite limited, I'm assuming the boy was on the Autistic spectrum and although the panto is a family performance and I expect to be disturbed by kids needing a wee,rustling sweets etc AIBU to be pissed off with our evening be ruined especially seeing the boy could have been seated on the end of the aisle where he would have disturbed others less ?

Yes, and notice she has not returned to explain

You would complain about a disabled child?

Blimey.

Will you shout at the waiting staff if they refuse you? If you want to look like a total pratt and cause a lot of unpleasantness that's up to you I guess. Im surprised it happens often enough for you to remember. I can't ever remember being disturbed in any way by someone with LD's (other than my own son)

Festive

I said that I do remove my child because of his ASD, which is a disability yet my posts are still there...

I cant see how leaving him in a situation which is causing negative behaviour HELPS him

I am very very offended Mumsnet

And also that it's not possible to modify the behaviour of someone with learning disabilities in the way it is with an NT individual

In the majority of cases it is. I am not saying its possible (or you should want them) for all Children with SN to appear NT. But some some modifying is possible with lots of children with SN.

My sister considered putting a badge on my nephew, explaining he has autism. I protested loudly about this. I won't have him needing to make excuses for just being him. If other people take issue with his character, then fuck 'em.

I would remove my child from a situation if upset or very very loud (although removing him might make him one hell of a lot louder I'm afraid), but I wouldn't remove him for being happy and excited at a panto.

Not clear whether the OP asked the boy to be moved back - that would have seemed the most sensible option, rather than sucking a bag of lemons and seething in silence.

Starfish (no idea why I have been calling you startail?! - sorry about that!) Thanks for being so gracious. I hadn't really considered the problem of subjectivity in an event being 'ruined' actually - you're right, many people probably are far too quick to write off the odd disruption as a ruined experience. And I guess I have no idea of the frequency of that because I don't have to live with it. I have a bit of a tendency to see mumsnet as all academic and divorce it from reality and real people very easily - so I'm sorry about any hurt or upset any of my words have caused to you. I haven't been thinking about real people and real problems - just hypothetical situations. Which is very interesting to me but actually isn't ok.

Although I do like the 'I have autism what explains your lack of social skills' t shirts

Can I just make it very clear that my deleted post contained Beaniestat's vile post. Just in case anyone thinks that I posted something disablist!

*given that was the subject of the thread I really didnt think it needed clarification.8

You said I can't and won't moderate my sons natural behavior. It was an entire paragraph.

It didn't say i can't moderate certain behaviors, some I can and do

I know you son does not have asopergers. I am showing an example where natural behavior should be modified and that natural behaviors is sometimes hurtful for others. HOw would you feel if my dd said something to your son that hurt you and him and I shrugged it off with 'its her natural behaviour'?

Thats my point. If you meant something different from your statement about 'won't' then that a different situation.

Am I not showing the same inflexibleness and lack of consideration for others that some on this thread are?

kungfupannda I am sure no one would think that

Can I just make it very clear that my deleted post contained Beaniestat's vile post. Just in case anyone thinks that I posted something disablist!

Mine too!

maybe beanie could help me with my list.
I am compiling a list of places tha kids with sn would not be allowed....
we have pantomimes
busses in the wheelchair space(especially if in wheelchairs)
anyone want to carry on

It won't be long until this thread is deleted.

Mainstream schools, threesocks. Can't have them taking TA time away from their little pwecious (even though TA is funded specifically for child's needs)

yohoho are you being deliberately obtuse?

cinnamonnut I hope it isn't
every time there is a thread like this, it is deleted.
yes it is vile
yes there are some vile posts on it.
but people should be able to see the vileness