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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to expect my boss to tell me which shifts I'm working 5 weeks before I return to work from ML?

19 replies

MrsHuxtable · 27/12/2012 21:06

Because today I asked him and he acted as if I was.

Told me he hadn't thought about it yet and would get back to me at the end of January! Considering that I'm due to go back in the first week of February, how exactly does he expect me to arrange childcare for DD with 1 week notice?

I've had nothing but trouble with him ever since I got pregnant but this surely has to take the biscuit. My Christmas mood is in tatters.

Or am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:

Sirzy · 27/12/2012 21:08

Are you wanting to have set shifts? if so YANBU

If you work shifts as in changing month on month then surely you would just get them when the rota has been set?

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 27/12/2012 21:09

No, it's set shifts. Always has been. For everyone. No rota.

OP posts:

MammaTJ · 27/12/2012 21:12

Hmm, where I work, the rotas are put up two weeks in advance at the most!

There is noone who has to worry about childcare though.

Set shifts? Should be easy to sort, YANBU!!!

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 27/12/2012 21:16

You see, the problem I think is, that he never hired a proper maternity cover. Just divided my shifts up between other staff and now he doesn't know where to pull them from.
He whole pregnancy/maternity leave thing is just too much hassle for him.

People have been working the same shifts for years. I had mine for 4 years before DD so really no rota organising as such involved.

My theory is that he's hoping I won't return and is now making it as hard as possible, knowing that realistically noone can get childcare with a week notice.

OP posts:

DPotter · 27/12/2012 21:43

I seem to vaguely remember something about agreeing working arrangements a month before you start back from ML - but it could be ancient history or my old employer's policy. You could try asking over on Legal or checking with ACAS - they have a vg website

BiteyWeeFucker · 27/12/2012 21:45

I think that's a bit dodgy legally.

But it's Christmas/ New Year/ winter season so maybe not the best time to ask someone.

Shelby2010 · 27/12/2012 21:47

Why don't you just suggest you go back to the shifts you worked before. Or if they are no longer practical (for you), tell him what you would prefer. You mightn't get what you want but at least he'll have a point to start from.

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 27/12/2012 21:59

Our relationship is so screwed up now that I'm worried he'll give me exactly the opposite shifts if I suggest something, just to bully me. Also I don't really feel comfortable doing that as basically I'm taking shifts/money away from some other member of staff.

He said in no uncertain terms not to ask him agan and that he'll contact me. Yeah, he still ows me 4 weeks holiday pay and it took him 4 MONTHS to reply to a letter concerning that. Not holding my breath tbh.

So does everyone only agree their working hours 4 weeks before? How are these people then arranging childcare id nurseries etc need to be booked often 1 year in advance?

OP posts:

DoodleHolly · 27/12/2012 22:00

I would say I will be assuming that I am
Retuning on my previous shifts in the absence of the
Advance notice adequate to allow me to arrange cover and if he wishes to deviate from this to advise me and I would notify him
Of when I could implement this.

Ultimately to prejudice you because of returning
From ml is sex discrim though I doubt you want to
Play that card yet

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock · 27/12/2012 22:07

ok this is shit. he really should give you at least a month notice IMO. BUT you will be able to get childcare, even if it's temporary with a week's notice. but dont let it get to the end of january. ring him back tomorrow and tell him you need 4 week's notice to sort childcare.

i had 3 day's notice, not just of what days i would be working but of where i would be working as i was told i would be returning to a different branch (national bank) after ML. i got ds a place in a nursery that afternoon.

the key is to view nurseries and childminders now so you know which ones you would be happy with using if even temporarily.

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 27/12/2012 22:13

Oh, I don't need childcare as such. Dh works from home mostly so will be doing it. However, he will be teaching one day a week (away from home obviously) so needs to know whether he has to change that day before the new semester starts in the middle of January. Otherwise we might be overlapping one day.

My boss doesn't know this. For all he knows I need to find a nursery place and I'm just worried that him fobbing me off again today is just a continuation of what was going on during my pregnancy and ML.

OP posts:

DontmindifIdo · 28/12/2012 09:41

I agree sending an e-mail stating that you are assuming you are returning to your previous shifts of XYZ unless he would like to inform you of a change, and you will require at least 1 month's notice of a change.

If it's only one day that will be a problem, it might be worth contacting a couple of nurseries and just checking if they have places on that day.

Are you concerned he's told the other staff members the additional shifts they were covering were permanent changes to their contracts and he now can't just take those back?

cocobongo · 28/12/2012 09:59

To those posters suggesting contacting nurseries- it isn't as easy as that. Most nurseries will require a settling in period in which you stay with the child and progressively leave them for longer times. So not likely that they can just be on standby for last minute.

DontmindifIdo · 28/12/2012 10:04

Cocobongo - true for most, but I know DS's did require a settling in period normally, but I also know they took another friend's DC when she was stuck with only a half day settling in on the Friday when her first day would be the Monday. (My friend's childcare was supposed to be her dad, then her dad got ill the week before she was due back to work and she needed a solution fast)

It's worth making the calls just to see if that's an option.

Icelollycraving · 28/12/2012 10:45

Do you have an Hr dept? They should be sorting all this out for you. If not,email first week of Jan stating you are returning to your position on same t&c as before ml giving your return date.

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 28/12/2012 10:51

The mothers I got to know here with babies the same age all had to book their nursery places when they were about 8 to 10 weeks pregnant. I feel that nursery isn't really an option for us anyway. For what it's worth, my lovely neighbour (who raised 6 own children and know does volunteer work with children) has told me she will look after DD if worst comes to worst. She's practically part of our family (hers is all over the world and so is ours) and has become something like a granny substitute anyway. There are only 6 days of DH teaching that might overlap so I think with the help of my neighbour we can swing it. Panicking much less now.

Still worried that it's all a sign of more bullying to come. His wife blanking me yesterday was a taster.

And yes, I think, that my boss never made it clear to whoever is working my shifts that it's just cover because I know he asumed I wouldn't come back and is notoriously bad at organising anything. Essentially he is now in the situation where he has to cut hours from other people to give them back to me. And I feel like the bad guy.

I will give him 2 weeks to contact me (because he was so insistend yesterday I shouldn't contact him) and if he's not done so by then I will write what you said about assuming it's old shifts.

OP posts:

Original poster

MrsHuxtable · 28/12/2012 10:53

No HR. It's a small business and the owner comes in briefly once a day to check stuff is running. No email either...

OP posts:

GoldQuintessenceAndMyhrr · 28/12/2012 11:02

It is worth checking nurseries anyway. I remember some nurseries, who were providing free childcare places to deprived families through the council, were notoriously booked and had long waiting lists. Dont just rely on what people tell you, try check it yourself. Having a good nursery on board for that one day a week your dh is teaching, can be quite good. Especially if they are able to be flexible and can take ad hoc days. My sons nursery was like that. My sons went to an Asquith Nurser - they are a chain.

We had an arrangement where he went 3 half days per week, with two hours on top, so from 9-15 - as I did not need, and could not afford a full day (8-17). This worked out cheaper for me.

But back to your original op, I cant advice, as I know nothing about shifts, but your boss sounds like a Pita.

DontmindifIdo · 29/12/2012 11:40

It's great you've got someone who can help out if need be.

If you will need it in the future, don't assume that nurseries won't have places for one or two days, even if for a full time place you have to put your name down nearly a year in advance - it really just depends on the work patterns of the other parents using the nursery. At DS's nursery, for example - I know that they currently have spaces on a Friday and a Wednesday for immediate start, however if you were looking for a full time place you'd have to join a waiting list of 6months + because they are full on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays.

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