To feel a bit miffed for my little DD?

[ChristabelChristmas]

DD will be 4 next week and today PIL informed me that they will not be buying her any birthday presents as she got so many for Christmas. They said that she has enough to "keep her going" so they'll just give her a card. I can't help but feel a bit upset for her as I also have a Christmas(ish) birthday and know what it's like for people to gloss over it ... but I'm not 4! AIBU to feel that they should have kept one back for her birthday if they were concerned about her getting too many yesterday?

It is mine and DDs birthdays next week. It is IMO the very worst time for a birthday.

As a child I always got joint Christmas/ birthday presents. Everyone has had Christmas and new year and is either getting ready to go back to school or work.

The worst thing was that people would say oh she had so much at Christmas she doesn't need any more for her birthday. That isn't the point! Everyone else gets a birthday!

We did move DDs party to a few months later for a while so she got a half year birthday and that works very well. But she is old enough now to know her birthday is being ignored. We make a fuss for her, but no one else can be bothered. It is very hurtful and I feel your pain.

One of my dc's birthday is next week. My mum did the same not wanting to get ds anything because so close to Christmas. Her birthday came and I gave her just a card. She queried it and I told her that she had gotten lots at Christmas so didn't see the point of getting her anything. The following year, his b'day presents were wrapped in Christmas paper, her b'day so were hers..
I had tried explaining before hand that it wasn't the point that he had Christmas stuff a week before, the point was it was his b'day and he didn't understand why he didn't get anything from her. I would prefer that if money was an issue, she spend less at Christmas to make his actual b'day a big deal, just like his siblings. Not his fault he was born when he was.

YANBU!

I hated this as a child with a December birthday. The thing I hated most was 'combined' presents - which I was usually told were extra special but were never actually anything my sister wouldn't get for her summer BD if she wanted it. Still hate it as an adult; it's been years since the work Christmas do has NOT coincided with the Friday night when I wanted to celebrate.

Agree with the suggestion of getting your DH to speak with them. They're his parents after all.

I hate it. I'm 34 today and I still get 'combined' presents usually from my 'Cam't be bothered' brothers.
It really isn't that hard to buy and extra present or 2 when doing your Christmas shopping.

Right, I'm off to hit the sales. (the only good thing about me being today!)

DS turns 4 at the weekend. I make sure he has presents from us. We take Christmas cards down for his birthday cards to go up and we make sure it feels like a birthday rather than an extension of Christmas celebrations. Fortunately no one in our family has the same idea as your PIL although most seem to give money rather than a gift. We put the money away until summer and then buy him toys for outside with it.

I'd be tempted to not buy for PIL birthday from now on if I were you and explain when the time comes that you gave them a present at Christmas.

Agree they are being mean. My daughter has this problem, after all approx 1/6 of the population have a birthday in December or January. When she was young she didn't need a glut of stuff at the same time of year and her interests and ability changed over the year so relatives bought her small presents for her birthday and gave her dad and I money to buy something for her in the summer time. We put it in a special account and kept a record of who gave what so the giver could be thanked when the present was eventually bought. Now she's older she asks for money which she saves herself.

My birthday is this Saturday. I have had many problems with my Mother but she always made sure I had separate birthday AND Christmas presents.

Throughout the years I've had the birthday presents wrapped in xmas paper, joint presents, horrible "For your December Birthday" cards but I especially hate it when you are given a Christmas present and when someone else mentions your birthday the present giver then says "oh, I didn't realise, that's for your birthday too then"

I agree with the others that it is the perfect chance for an "outing" type gift - a trip together to the theatre or somewhere expensive with a very big slice of cake. It could be booked for January / February and a lovely voucher wrapped in an enormous box to open now. Your PIL are being mean and unimaginative.

We have a nephew with a birthday a couple of days before Christmas. It has never occurred to me to do a combined present, or spend less than I do on his brothers or to wrap his present in Christmas gift wrapping.
And why would it?
If its your inlaws who came out with the statement, I think your DH needs to have a word so they understand the unfairness.

My dcs both have birthdays relatively soon after Christmas. PILs buy them Post Office bonds each year so they will have a little nest egg when they are 18.

Print off this thread and send it to them - in their birthday card, with no present. Maybe then they'll understand ....

I think an outing type present would e good. My parents do this for the gc now because they feel they have too much stuff and none of the gc have Christmassy birthdays. A nice theatre trip and meal normally.

My birthday is early jan and it is a bit crap. I do think a half birthday is even more crap. Your birthday is your birthday and just because other people find jan birthdays annoying doesn't negate the fact that it is still MY day!!