Well my DH hasn't lifted a finger

[Lynned]

But he lifted his feet so I could vacuum under them. Still have a pile of presents to wrap (for his family on Saturday). Made a lasagne ( admittedly the meat sauce was from the freezer) and an ice cream bomb for dessert. Sorted two loads of washing... Need I go on? I could easily be the Asda mum!

My dh has worked his arse off all Christmas and in the run up to it cooking, cleaning, tidying up etc etc etc. Can't stand this lazy man bullshit.

If you like being treated like a maid then power to ya but seriously is this the way you want your kids to see a relationship between their parents, one a lazy pig and the other a frigging moany martyr maid.

Why do you feel embarrassed that all your loved ones are all alive? That doesn't make any sense to me.

Well he helped wrap the presents. I went up stairs to do some presents for my family for today ( nothing like leaving things to the last minute) He cottoned on to my mood ( we have been together 27 years- married 20) and asked if he could help.

I do feel bad for him that he has lost all his family, his mum loved Xmas, and sometimes he looks so sad.

I think he would do more cooking, but he's not very good at it! I just wish he would help more in the house during holiday time. ( that's why now we can afford it, we no longer have self catering holidays)

He works like a dog to provide for us, and I don't mind our traditional roles during a normal week. That works for us, I guess we wouldn't have been together so long otherwise. We didn't row yesterday, he knows when I am annoyed. To be honest my post was slightly moaning, slightly tongue in cheek, I was amazed at some of the strongly worded posts. Thank you for your input.

I'm glad you feel happier than when you started the thread. [smike]

I think the probelm is, light-hearted or not, the OP was going to get some robust responses. "lifted his feet" abd comparing yourself to the much derided Asda advert is going to make you appear like some weary wife of someone who is a nob. And is that is the case, then strong replies may be a much-needed wake-up call.

But maybe you can move on from this and not let teh situation get into a stage where you're unhappy again?

He's not that bad really! Their trouble is they don't think the same way as us. If I asked him to do something he would. It would just be nice just for things to get done without asking.

BOLLOCKS! Mr Tigga does everything all the housework except cooking and ironing because he's a neat freak and I'm more it's ok as long as nothing is moving. People don't do it because too many people are prepared to martyr themselves and do it. Make him get up and do it as well.

FFSTiggaxx

If you are a SAHM to children of 11 and 14, you obviously get far more time to relax during the normal working week than he does. You do admit that he 'works like a dog' to provide. I do think it is fair that you put in a lot more work over Christmas to give him time to relax. That's fair.

However, I don't think it's good that he and the children treat you like a skivvy. Neither of you are setting good role models for the DC and that needs changing asap as they are already fairly grown up. I'm not sure why you can't just ask him to do this or that rather than getting in a mood or asking people on MN what they think.

Just ask him to help you?

I think as a SAHM to an 11 & 14 yr old you would get plenty of "me" time when they are at school so chill!!!

Redhelenb

I do! That's why I said my thread was a bit tongue in cheek. But at the same time I did feel a little bit like Asda mum!

It was only yesterday I felt a bit miffed. We have a good balance on the whole, he goes off to golf at weekends while I look after the kids. That's not hard now, but it damn well was when they were babies, and I had been at home all the week.

I would like to go back to work and when the economy picks up a bit, will look for something to get us through the university years!

On the basis of your OP, YANBU, but as others have said, if your kids are 11 and 14 and you are a SAHM then certainly under normal circumstances I would imagine you could get most house stuff done while he is at work. Xmas does engender more work and yes he should pitch in a bit but you are asking for a flaming on here if you post things like "they (men) just don't see stuff like we do" (or words to that effect). You are moaning about him but then also excusing it. I won't flame you, having taken note of your "tongue in cheek" comment, everyone is allowed to feel a bit fed up now and then, but your must appreciate that for most of us on here, the idea of having the amount of time to yourself that two school aged kids would give a SAHM is a bit of a dream!