Well my DH hasn't lifted a finger

[Lynned]

But he lifted his feet so I could vacuum under them. Still have a pile of presents to wrap (for his family on Saturday). Made a lasagne ( admittedly the meat sauce was from the freezer) and an ice cream bomb for dessert. Sorted two loads of washing... Need I go on? I could easily be the Asda mum!

It's sometimes threads like these that making being a lone parent seem not too bad. Sure, I have to everything myself and DS, but at least I don't have to do it for anyone else... am not sure I could cope with running around after another adult! I even make DS pull his (tiny) weight, at six!

I set the table as I'm so anal no one would do it right!

I cleaned the house from top to bottom Christmas Eve DP helped by keeping the DC out the way.

I did Christmas dinner but I love doing it, DP cleared up and I thin he had the hardest job as there wasn't anything in the kitchen I hadn't used , I'm a SAHM too but if he's here it's 50/50 down the middle, it needs two people with our 4 DC.

I really don't get this 1950s attitude of "he does nothing" whilst knackered woman waits on him. Kick his arse.

Yes I like the cooking part. If I didn't do the Xmas shopping, they just wouldn't get anything. I might add he doesn't like Xmas, after his dm, df, dsis and uncle all died in the space of 10 years. I feel almost embarrassed that I have all my family iyswim. On Saturday we have his aunt, step uncle, bl and motherless nephew and niece..

"They" don't think the same way as "us" - you're damn right there. Lazy sods certainly don't think the same way as those of us who do what needs to be done.

Your dh, for example, doesn't think the same way as mine - who did his half of the work of Christmas, runs his own business and is back at work today. If you like things that way, then make his excuses for him, but spare us the simpering martyrdom.

i just dont get these threads at all.

What Cachaca said. Get him to help, or stop complaining. It's not because he's a man, it's because he's a lazy shit, and you're enabling him.

So what if he's back at work later in the week. My DP works full time, I am a SAHM, Ds is 9 so it's hardly the demanding job it was when he was pre-school. DP still cooked half the Christmas dinner, did half of the washing up etc.

Ask yourself if your husband would prefer to be waited on hand and foot, or perhaps see his wife for a few hours over Christmas where she's not rushed off her feet seeing to everyone but herself. If he does his share you get more time together and with your DCs.

Also your DC's are old enough to help. DS sets and clears tables and tidies up, give them a few jobs and have yourself a sit down with the family when everyone has done their bit.

I was mentioned this thread to DP who said he couldn't sit on his arse and watching me run myself ragged. He said "what kind of man does this I don't understand them?"

My mother is misogynistic, she thinks that as long as a man gives you money he should be able to do what he wants (seriously I grew up with this shit), an odd "slap" isn't the worst thing in the world. She loves to tell anyone that her husband can hardly boil a kettle, it's kind of a martyr badge of honour.

I just don't understand why having a oenis means you cannot cook or clean

Also yes I meant to add, it's not because they're men, that's insulting to men! My dad is a widower and takes care of himself, my brother is single and his house puts mine to shame in terms of tidiness! Men are perfectly capable of running a household, your dp simply doesn't have to because you do it for him.

Has anyone said "oh, but men just don't see the mess" yet? That is complete and utter bollocks as well.

'They don't think the same way as us'

Utter bollocks. If you want to be a martyr, fine, but don't pretend all Mem are like this. If you act like a skivvy don't be surprised to be treated like one.

Men

These threads are so depressing

The scary thing is sons are being brought up like this thinking wives skivvies for their husbands.

My brother is a lazy arse and all my SIL does is moan about him whie cleaning up after him. She'll probably do the same for my nephew.

Depressing

I really don't understand why some women think that it's normal to do everything, moan behind their dp's back and then roll their eyes and say that "they're all like that". They aren't.

I do more around the house than dh does because I'm at home for more hours in the week than he is. When we're both at home he does his share. Yesterday I cooked, he cleaned up afterwards. This morning we have both tidied the house from top to bottom in anticipation of the IL's visit later on today, so now he's gone to the football and I'm sat on my arse MNing and eating Cadbury's Heroes. Equal amount of effort in, equal amount of time in which to spend doing whatever we want.

It hasn't always been like this, dh has been a lazy arse in the past. I've just put him right and he's realised he was in the wrong and stepped up.

Oh, and he has (admittedly improving now) CFS and still manages to push a hoover round.

OP, don't do it if you don't want to. You're being a skivvy.

My dp is currently hanging up the washing while entertaining 9month old dd while sit on my arse mucking about on mn. And I stayed in bed till 10 this morning while he got up with dd at 6. I didn't have to ask for any of this as he is a grown man who is capable is realising I am exhausted and so doing something to help.

I vote for a strike

He hasn't had a day off since November? Well if you're a SAHM you won't have had a day off for a darn sight longer than that.

My dh has just carved up the cold turkey prior to making some soup, blitzed two bathrooms (including de-scaling the shower heads), walked the dog, brought me breakfast in bed and numerous cups of tea/ freshly brewed coffee, taken out the recycling/bins, put the Hoover round and will probably organise 50% of dinner for my family later.
And no, he won't get a medal for it, just as I won't for all the stuff I'm doing as well. And I didn't have to ask him to do any of it either. He lives in this house same as I do and can see what needs doing.

If it pisses you off then say summat!

My DP can be a right lazy twat, one day he said he was going to make himself a bacon sarnie, a couple of minutes later he called me into the kitchen, handed me the frying pan and said "will you wash this for me?" i replied with "are you fucking joking? Wash it yourself"

Me and DP kinda have a compromise now, he does most of the cooking (because he likes it) and i do most of the housework because i like things done a certain way

He is now washing up, and hopefully I will get a cup of tea. Maybe he ain't that bad!