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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in showing no interest in DD's teacher retiring today

99 replies

fishandlilacs · 20/12/2012 12:16

My dd is in yr 1, shes is my oldest. Her teacher retires today. I haven't sent a card, or flowers or a gift or contributed to her collection. I am not going to her leaving assembly later on.

She has only taught my dd for one term and my impression of her is that shes a dismissive old trout who I don't like one bit. On parents evening she told me "she didn't have time to pander to DD's needs" because she still struggled with zips and buttons and was left outside in the cloakroom for 20 minutes crying one day because she couldn't do up her dress. This teacher started the lesson without her and I was bloody furious. She's 5 FFS.

Things have improved since then, my dd's reading in particularly is superb now so she has done her job but i really cant wait to see the back of her.

OP posts:
threesocksfullofchocs · 20/12/2012 14:10

"To be honest, at age 5 I fail to see the difference between SN and non SN where general practical help is concerned."

really did someone really post that !!

Original poster
fishandlilacs · 20/12/2012 14:11

I'll try Ariel.

Now i need to some up with a choice phrase that i can say that sounds like a compliment but is actually an insult. (er..that will called veiled insult then...) DOH!

OP posts:
akaemmafrost · 20/12/2012 14:15

OP I would be furious if my dd had been left like that and I wouldn't do jack all for Meany's Retirement.

YANBU at all.

akaemmafrost · 20/12/2012 14:18

ariel how can you possibly know that?

My dd has just been diagnosed with ASD. Her teacher and the school had not a clue. She was punished and put on the sad face board a few times for issues arising from it. They never bothered to consider if something else might be going on. Sometimes teachers are not as faberooney and on the button as many on MN seem to think.

manicinsomniac · 20/12/2012 14:20

Yes, 3socks, I did. A 5 year old who needs help is a 5 year old who needs help. I would never discriminate because one had SN and one didn't. No difference at all in my mind, just 2 little children who need an adult. Why is that a problem??

akaemmafrost · 20/12/2012 14:22

Agree Manic and I have two dc with SN. They're still very little at that age, if they need help, they need help.

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid · 20/12/2012 14:23

Here's a suggestion. Read the rest of the relatively short and therefore quick to read thread.

Fish, something like "My daughter and I have greatly enjoyed and appreciated the opportunity to benefit from your wisdom and VAST experience and I wish you a happy retirement."

akaemmafrost · 20/12/2012 14:26

You sound really quite obnoxious Ariel. Cross posted on phone with new app and hadn't refreshed. It's easily done.

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid · 20/12/2012 14:37

I'm not generally obnoxious. I can be on occasion. Like most people.

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid · 20/12/2012 14:39

Actually looking at it, I have been obnoxious on this thread. You're absolutely right.

Floggingmolly · 20/12/2012 14:45

Why was your dd struggling for twenty minutes with a zip? If it was one of those school summer dresses, the zip is on the front, isn't it? Confused, and if it's a non uniform school, it's up to you to send her in wearing clothes she can manage.

PottedShrimp · 20/12/2012 14:51

YANBU - There is far too much arse licking of teacher IMO.

No other job gets gifts, cards and arselicking as much as a teacher. They are paid to do a job. Let them get on with it. And when they leave, they leave.

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid · 20/12/2012 14:54

OK if I am ever obnoxious it's often in response to people like the previous poster.

One of the reasons I left teaching, it could be said, was because of the amount of "arselicking" of parents like PottedShrimp I was expected to do. Good grief.

storynanny · 20/12/2012 14:56

I suppose I would be called " old school" as I've just taken early semi-retirement after 35 years of infant teaching, however I would never ever let a child get upset over a zip and have never come across teachers who would. In every profession there must be a couple of grumpy people, hopefully not too many who are involved in the care and educating of our little ones.

PottedShrimp · 20/12/2012 15:03

Ariel - I am talking about parents arselicking the teacher not vice versa or have I read your post wrong?

ArielTheBahHumbugMermaid · 20/12/2012 15:20

Yes I know what you said. Arse licking is an extremely unpleasant phrase. Do you see anyone who gets a present for teacher as an arselicker?

TheCrackFox · 20/12/2012 15:25

YANBU

Surely, if a teacher retires it is up to his/hers colleagues to sort out a leaving present.

The children could (if they wanted) make a card.

quirrelquarrel · 20/12/2012 15:27

Why....is this a thread?
I didn't know we had to ask people if it was all right to like/dislike people now.

Sorry OP I know I'm being soo bitchy but it sounds like you're making a big deal of it in your head. So you don't care she's retiring. It's no drama.

PottedShrimp · 20/12/2012 15:28

Ariel - Yes, that is why I said it Hmm

Original poster
fishandlilacs · 20/12/2012 15:46

You're right quirrel- a thread motivated out of boredom perhaps? I just fancied a chat about it actually. Is that ok? Or are we not allowed to post frivolous conversations on this forum? I'll make sure all my input is carefully policed and always makes a point in future.

Anyway it's done now, I went to the assembly, gave a her a christmas card and thanked her for her "positive influence" on DD. She gave me a mince pie and gave DD a hug and said "keep reading, you're doing so well" It was quite nice and I felt like a sour puss for thinking these thoughts.

Alls well that ends well.

OP posts:
akaemmafrost · 20/12/2012 15:49

I wouldn't worry OP, you've had loads of responses so clearly many others thought your thread worthy of their time.

Atthewelles · 20/12/2012 15:51

For God's sake quirrel if you don't like the subject of the thread just don't read it. There are lots of threads on here I don't find interesting so I just ignore them. I don't go giving out to the OP for daring to post on something I don't find important.

Narked · 20/12/2012 16:00

'She's a darn site better at (dressing herself) now than she was 3 months ago'

I wonder if that's because someone encouraged her to do it for herself rather than doing it for her.

Atthewelles · 20/12/2012 16:02

I wouldn't say leaving a child crying on their own in the cloakroom is 'encouraging' them.

Cardsharp999 · 20/12/2012 16:05

I think it's up to you what you do. But would your kid feel left out. I know its pandering to peer pressure.