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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think my friend is overreacting?

71 replies

violetpurplerain · 18/12/2012 04:18

Basically I'll try not to drip feed.

Best friends birthday last week, gave her her birthday present. She opens it and says "you bought me these earrings for Christmas" (Christmas 2011) and then handed them back to me.

I felt really embarrassed. With quite a large gap of 11 months I had managed to buy her the same earrings without realising. Whilst I admit that was completely stupid of me, it was definitely 100% an awful mistake. And you would have thought the stock in Accessorize would have changed.

I then bought her a new necklace instead. Went over to her house and she wasn't in. I hide the gift bag round the side of her house and sent her a text, so she would know where it was.

No reply.

I saw her tonight and still she didn't say anything. So at the end of the night I asked outright if she got her presents (flowers too) and she just replied "yeah I did" and walked away.

We were going out for a meal on Thursday and she has sent me a text to cancel.

I'm not expecting hugs and thanks, but I do expect an acknowledgement and for her not to blank me.

Yes I made an honest mistake, and I tried as best I could to rectify it.

aibu to think she is completely overreacting?

OP posts:
Hyperballad · 18/12/2012 04:26

Is your best friend 15?!

Yanbu, silly immature reaction. Me and my mates would just have a laugh and seize the opportunity to call you names like senile old bat etc Grin and we'd all be well chuffed with flowers and a necklace. Silly little Madame I think.

PiccadillyCervix · 18/12/2012 04:27

yes, and she is being a total arsehole as well. I would have found it funny you bought the same thing twice.. you obviously thought it was her style!

You need new friends violet.

EllieArroway · 18/12/2012 04:33

Sorry, I know she's your friend and everything - but what a bloody bitch Shock

Frankly, I would delete her number and never have anything to do with the entitled little madam ever again.

Original poster
violetpurplerain · 18/12/2012 04:35

Haha oh I know I definitely must have thought they were something she really wanted.

OP posts:
TanteRose · 18/12/2012 04:40

Shock my 15 year old DD has better manners than this!

Please tell me you aren't going to buy her a Xmas present?

I would let the friendship slide if I were you

EMS23 · 18/12/2012 04:48

She's definitely overreacting. How odd for a grown woman to act that way. Is she generally so spoilt and ungrateful?

I'd have found it funny and TBH probably wouldn't have said anything so as to spare your feelings because you're my best friend and I'd have known it was a genuine mistake and the thought was clearly there.

Going forward do you want to confront her over it or will you let it slide when she deigns to talk to you again?

KeatsiePie · 18/12/2012 04:53

Wow that is rude. Her first reaction was rude! Let alone being bitchy about the necklace and flowers. Is she normally a nice friend to have?

If someone gave me the same earrings I don't think I'd even say anything, b/c I can't imagine a way to even joke about it that wouldn't make my friend feel bad.

Jeezaloo · 18/12/2012 04:58

YANBU - Your friend is bang out of order.

So you bought her the same gift twice - big deal! She should have kept schtum, or laughed it off. Instead she gave the gift back - and then failed to thank you when you rectified the situation with a different gift, and flowers!

Does she usually act like this? If not, then perhaps text her and ask what is going on, as she's acting really rudely, and there must be a reason for it (perhaps something is worrying her and she's taking it out on you). If she usually acts like this, then move on and find a nicer friend!

MammaTJ · 18/12/2012 05:12

I'm like Ems, I would have laughed and taken the piss out of you for being so scatty. That in itself would have been birthday present enough. Grin

Iheartpasties · 18/12/2012 05:40

Wow she sounds like a prize bitch! Just such a cow! You kindly gave her a gift, twice! Argh! some people are up their own arse and she certainly is.

peaceandlovebunny · 18/12/2012 05:59

she doesn't like you and doesn't want your presents.
sack her.

DonkeysInTheStableAtMidnight · 18/12/2012 06:03

I lose earrings so often - always one, never the pair - I probably would've been thrilled to get another set!

Anyway where were her manners, how poorly was she dragged up?
YANBU.

AlexReidsLonelyThisChristmas · 18/12/2012 06:32

YA most definitely NBU, but she is.

If you've already bought her Christmas present keep it for yourself. She doesn't sound deserving of any more of your kindness or thought.

SugaricePlumFairy · 18/12/2012 06:43

What a spoilt rude woman she is.

Don't text her again, I'd certainly re-evaluate the friendship after her reaction.

Does she normally have queeny fits when things don't go her way?

caramelwaffle · 18/12/2012 06:52

Yanbu.

HECTheHallsWithRowsAndFolly · 18/12/2012 06:53

She is being a spoilt brat.

My advice to you is go hang out with people whose emotional age is greater than their shoe size.

buggerama · 18/12/2012 06:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CheerfulYank · 18/12/2012 07:01

Another here who would have laughed over it. She is definitely being U.

misterwife · 18/12/2012 07:49

Agree with everyone. YANBU. Shocking - toddlerish, even!

MrsBucketxx · 18/12/2012 07:52

Yanbu,

Why are you friends with this woman? Spoilt brat come to mind.

Chelvis · 18/12/2012 07:57

I did the exact same thing with my sister a few years ago! She was trying not to laugh, so worried me asked if they were ok and if she liked them. She pointed out that she loved them so much she was wearing them, the exact same pair I'd bought her for her birthday only 3 months before Blush In my defence, I was pregnant at the time.

Her normal-person response was to roar with laughter and for us to take the mickey out of each other by 'memorising' each others presents to buy again next year. Your 'friend' is a bit of a bitch to be upset at a gift! She sounds mean!

ChristmasSpiritEndorphins · 18/12/2012 09:30

Yanbu, she is being snotty and rude.
My dh bought me pearls 2 years in a row, almost identical, he forgot that he had already bought me some. And I bought my ds1 a He-Man Castle, and did not realize he already had one. People are human and we all forget from time to time.

Back2Two · 18/12/2012 09:32

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns

MissMogwi · 18/12/2012 09:42

YANBU she sounds like a spoilt drama queen with no manners.

NannyEggn0gg · 18/12/2012 09:43

How rude.
Not a friend in the slightest.