To think I wasn't in the wrong here?!

[PenguinBear]

We sometimes have the little children over the road to play while their mum does the shopping/ has a rest etc. I know she is using me as free child care as DP loves to remind me but my dc love her children so I don't mind having them. This has been going on a couple of years now but they are no bother so it's all good. Their father works from home but I usually only see their mum.

She is currently pregnant and wanted to go with her DH to buy some baby stuff at the weekend so asked if we could have the children for the day. 

I foolishly said yes and we had them for about 8 hours (much longer than expected). I tried to ring but they were 'stuck' in London.
We ended up all going out for dinner in the evening so took them with us, dropped them home, all was well so I thought.

One of them left some bits at our house so I have just dropped them over and her DH answered the door and proceeded to tell me off for letting his children have ice-cream.  I felt like saying well come back when you said you would. They never told me not to let them have ice-cream and it was only a small child's portion after their pizza dinner at a local Italian. 
AIBU to be annoyed? I did them a favour imo and feel like I won't bother next time which is a shame as the children are lovely. 

Sorry for the long post, thanks if you got to the end!

[financialwizard]

I agree with everyone else.

I would also definitely say something, probably to the husband though. I also think I would be presenting the bill for their children's meal to them and expect it to be paid.

[Pigsinblankets]

What a complete tool. Refuse to have them next time saying you are worried you might unwittingly corrupt them.

[ConfusedPixie]

I can't believe that, what a prick! Don't care for the kids again and certainly don't apologise! They should be apologising after all of these years if free childcare, not you!

[expatinscotland]

I'd have told him where to stick it and where to get, you crabbit old codger, but if you're not into confrontation, don't apologise. Ring her up and tell her that due to what happened last weekend and her husband's scolding, you aren't available to have her kids over anymore. She's a pisstaker as much as he is.

[toomuchturkeyatendofthedinner]

Been thinking about this today and hoping for an update from OP re text or convo. Hope it went well OP and you feel better. Let us know. Still on your behalf!!!

[SauvignonBlanche]

I hope OP has been in touch with the wife.

[Anniegetyourgun]

Remember that lovely lady whose neighbours used to wander uninvited into their house of an evening and drink their wine, among other cheeky escapades? She grew a fine pair o' balls and told them where to get off. Hopefully PenguinBear will find the support here to do the same

[DueInSeptember]

Don't apologise!

I wouldn't be surprised if the wife is as bad as her husband. In her shoes I would have definitely stopped him from being rude to you, or I would have made him apologise to you after the event. Shockingly rude people!

[SauvignonBlanche]

Oh yes, 'balls of fire' IIRC.

[SauvignonBlanche]

Or was it steel?

[PenguinBear]

I've been avoiding coming back as I haven't done anything . I wimped out as I didn't want there to be any bad feeling between us plus I feel sorry for the children.

[DontmindifIdo]

I think you will have bad feeling anyway, because you're now going to be aware of her DH being rude to you if she ever asks you for another favour, you are going to be the one with bad feeling, and probably reluctant to help out, or to make a mistake when helping out and therefore get shouted at again.

You should say something to clear the air now.

[Floggingmolly]

Agree. The next time she asks it will be too late to say anything without it just sounding like an excuse, and he does need to know how upsetting his rant was.

[simplesusan]

If you still want to have the children over then just have them for an hour and then send them back home when it is dinner time.
When she asks you to look after them for their convenience say no, then tell her that you don't appreciate being spoken to the way her husband did.

[cbeebiesatemybrain]

You need to say something or they will treat you like a doormat forever! I'm really pissed off on your behalf!

[digerd]

They have taken advantage of your good nature, used you, and treated you like dirt. They should have apologised for being late, but they didn't. Instead he had go at you. Completely out of order.
Some good examples above for you to consider,
Good luck.

[expatinscotland]

If I were your DH I'd have been over that road within minutes telling them both to knob off. There's no way I'd ever be used by them again no matter how sorry I felt for those kids.

[susanann]

you have been treated very badly. if you cant face it what about your other half doing something? dont let that awful man get away with it!!!!!!!

[FestiviaBlueberry]

PenguinBear, why don't you want there to be bad feeling between you?

And why do you think they don't give a shit if there is bad feeling between you?

That man wasn't even vaguely worried about potentially causing bad feeling between you, was he? And yet he was in the wrong. You're worried about causing bad feeling, but you are in the right.

Also, he wasn't worried about whether he would cause bad feeling between you and his wife. This means that either he doesn't give a shit about his wife's friendships, or that he knows his wife holds you in the same contempt as he does.

I really think you need to not worry about bad feeling between you. I understand that you don't want to spoil your DC's friendship, but that's unlikely anyway, isn't it?

[expatinscotland]

Your kids' friendship with theirs is based on her using you. The second that stops, you bet she'll drop you like a hot brick.

[Toomuchturkeyatendofthedinner]

The other posters are right, there will be bad feeling, in you, and that will fester, not good for you. Say, text, or even get your DH to say it, but something needs to be DONE!!!

[BluelightsAndSirens]

I agree with passive aggressive approach, his wife may not even know he has been such a dick, he obviously doesn't appreciate what a lovely friend you are.

Next time she asks say "no, sorry but we are having ice cream for dessert so I can't help today"

I predicte that she will be all and say "okaaaaay" and trots off to tell her DickHead that you are being weird.

What ever happens it is not your problem, yes you like their children but I think the parents ned a wake up call to how fucking lucky they are to have free childcare and that 8 hours is far too long for a friend to help out.

[PacificDogwood]

The more I think about this the more I would like to know how much your children play at theirs?
I don't think there is any need to necessarily generate any hostile feelings (unless you want to ).

Something like Fanjo's "Wtf is up with Horace today?! Telling me off because I gave Bono and Yoko some ice cream while out on our planned family meal!" seems perfect to me.
I agree you should not apologise - for what??! Cheeky beggars!

I feel confirmed in my Pissing Contest theory when I backread a bit and found he is an older father, married to a much younger woman, struggling to regain the moral high ground with yet another mere woman - how v dare you !

[expatinscotland]

You all are much nicer people than I am :o.

Honestly, I'd have lost the plot with that cheeky user.

[DoingitOnTheRoofTopWithSanta]

Well if you babysit all the tme then maybe they should have told you before that dc can't have icecream? Tell him to fuck off next time you see him you aren't the babysitter