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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's a bit odd that colleague isn't buying his DD Christmas presents?

158 replies

PurpleTinsel · 11/12/2012 11:58

I have a colleague who's first baby (a DD) was born about 6 months ago.

This will be her first Christmas. We were talking about Christmas yesterday, and colleague said that he and his DP are not buying their DD any Christmas presents at all because she's too young to appreciate Christmas.

I can understand not making a big deal about Christmas for a baby - but the idea that they're buying no Christmas presents for her at all, not even one small inexpensive present, surprised me.

Colleague is well paid and his family celebrate Christmas.

AIBU to think that this is odd behaviour?

OP posts:
harrietlichman · 11/12/2012 12:19

YABU, totally normal. My ds was born in December and he didn't get anything for his first Christmas and baby essentials for his second, the following year. I think this something parents do for themselves, same as those who take tiny babies to 'see' Father Christmas!

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 11/12/2012 12:21

YABU. Waste of time really, unless you buy or do something to mark their first Christmas that they'll appreciate later, like start a savings account or something.

LoonyRationalist · 11/12/2012 12:22

YABU, your colleague sounds very sensible.

Dogsmom · 11/12/2012 12:23

My dd is due in March so will be 9 months next christmas and I wouldn't dream of not buying her a present.

Having said that I won't go mad but want to get her something nice that she can keep for life knowing that it was her first present.

I've got a silver bangle that was my first christmas present.

worsestershiresauce · 11/12/2012 12:25

If the baby is 6 months old, they will have just spent a fortune buying everything she needs, so what's left to buy? Yet another toy or baby grow? I think they are being sensible, and OP has been dragged into the over consumption thing that xmas has unfortunately been turned into.

prettybird · 11/12/2012 12:27

YABU. Don't think we got ds anything for his first Christmas - he'd have been 3.5 months old.

Relatives (like my parents, dh's parents and our siblings) may have got him something - but that was more for us than for him. My parents got him a Tripp Trap chair which was useful and is still being used 12 years later Xmas Smile

DeckTheHallsWithBartimaeus · 11/12/2012 12:28

YANBU

I wanted to mark the first Christmas (DS was 3 months) so we bought a small cuddly toy dog (which is now a must-have for bedtime).

Yes he didn't need it right then, but I remember when I was a child I loved being told that this toy was from so-and-so for my first Christmas/birthday etc.

We could have waited a few months for when he started to be interested in toys but I'm glad we didn't.

Original poster
PurpleTinsel · 11/12/2012 12:28

Okay then, looks like I'm in the minority here!

I shall remind myself that colleague is being very sensible if I start thinking about this again.

And of course it's none of my business whether they buy their DD presents or not.

OP posts:
ProcessYellowC · 11/12/2012 12:28

YABU - she won't care!

trueblood1fan · 11/12/2012 12:34

yabvu - whats it gotta do with you anyway?!

FredFredGeorge · 11/12/2012 12:35

YABU we bought nothing for DD at 6 months, and will probably get almost nothing for DD at 18months...

She gets things when she needs them, or when they're good for her to play with etc. She doesn't understand Christmas (although sort of understands that she only gets the advent calendar once a day it seems.)

HoHoHoMoreBaubles · 11/12/2012 12:44

my DD was almost 1 at her first christmas (born exactly 2 weeks later 11 days overdueHmm) and we got her a couple of token gifts but if she had been younger then i dont think i would have bothered with much to be honest...she just ripped the wrapping paper to pieces and played with the boxes...

IMO little babies need nowt but love, warmth, milk and sleep...a plastic toy is just surplus to requirementsSmile

i wouldnt say YABU or not though as it is personal opinion and i have bought DHs cousins baby a prezzie and he is 5 monthsGrin

KellyEllyChristmasBelly · 11/12/2012 12:45

I think that's strange but I'm really into Xmas so was really excited for DD's first one :)

HoHoHoMoreBaubles · 11/12/2012 12:46

2 weeks after christmas that should sayXmas Blush

squoosh · 11/12/2012 12:47

trueblood1fan She didn't say it had anything to do with her. She was merely asking if other people found it odd.

SundaysGirl · 11/12/2012 12:48

YABU. I reckon a small box and some wrapping paper would be entertaining enough for a 6 month old.

EverythingsDozy · 11/12/2012 12:48

With our first (and our second for his first Christmas this year) we bought stuff that we would have bought anyway that they needed and wrapped it up. Mainly to show our parents that we had gotten them something (PIL are a bit funny about Christmas)

snowtunesgirl · 11/12/2012 12:49

We didn't get DD anything for her first Christmas as she was a month old and frankly I was too busy with her to even think about Christmas shopping. OP, do you genuinely think that a baby would notice?

Floggingmolly · 11/12/2012 12:49

Not strange at all.

Rachel130690 · 11/12/2012 12:53

We decided to buy our 3 month old a small gift for Christmas. I was going to wrap it up. But when we got it we thought it was a bit stupid so just opened it and he loves it. It's a door bouncy thing. He's dead cute in it. We won't be getting him anything else but he has a load of gifts under the tree already.

prettybird · 11/12/2012 12:54

Having said that, a work colleague of dh's gave him a freebie Christmas soft toy: a duck with "Merry Christmas" on the red beak (basically just a tube of white furry material with a red felt beak and eyes at one end and red flippers at the other).

Guess which toy ds attached to?! Xmas Grin

Duckie still has prime place in his "gang" of soft toys 12 years later! Xmas Smile

ZZZenAgain · 11/12/2012 12:54

don't find it at all odd really. Don't see the point in buying Christmas presents for a 6 month old baby.

Pipsytwos · 11/12/2012 12:57

I have a 3 month old and I've got her toys, books and clothes. She'd have got them anyway because she needs them but I've really enjoyed wrapping them and writing 'from Mummy and Daddy' (my first Christmas being a Mum) Obviously she wont care on the day but she'll enjoy her toys and books at some point or another. Each to their own I guess. It wont affect their child, as long as their child has everything she needs.

GreenPetals · 11/12/2012 12:58

Well actually OP I think you are right.
But for another reason.
We have photos of each of the dcs first Christmas and even though they have no memory of it, they do love looking back at the these pictures and see that, even as a baby, they were receiving presents (and were part of the family as of course everyone else was receiving presents too).

I am finding it strange too tbh. For me, whether the child will remember or not isn't the reason why you do that sort of things. Otherwise, you wouldn't do the child first (and second and third) birthday either 'as they won't remember about it'.

Whatevertheweather · 11/12/2012 13:00

Awww I think it's nice to have a little something to mark babies first christmas. DD1 was 9 months at her first one and had a special teddy bear and a rocking horse.

DD3 is going to be 4 months old this Christmas and she has much more including a stocking but this is mainly to stop a barrage of questions from DD1 who is now nearly 6.