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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think my colleague is being ridiculous?

124 replies

matchpoint · 10/12/2012 15:54

I work in your bog-standard office job-Monday to Friday, 9-5pm. I will be working Christmas Eve, as it is a normal working day, as will my colleagues.

One colleague is moaning to anyone who will listen about how unfaiirrrrr it is that she has to work on Christmas Eve and therefore can't spend the day with her children. Because Christmas is "all about the children!" and it's "soooo sad not spending Christmas Eve with your children".

My DH is working a 12.5 hour shift Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. (he is a nurse) and we have two young DDs. I was also a nurse (left the profession though), and am sick and tired of people thinking they have an automatic right to Christmas off because they have young children.

WIBU to tell her to go do one?

OP posts:
XBenedict · 10/12/2012 15:55

If it's that sad for her take an annual leave day.

worldgonecrazy · 10/12/2012 15:55

YANBU - I'm presuming she is free to book the day as Annual Leave?

threesocksfullofchocs · 10/12/2012 15:55

yanbu
but no idea why your dh being a nurse or you being an aex nurse has anything to do with it as you would still nbu

TeeElfOnTeeShelf · 10/12/2012 15:56

So she'll be off work at 5? And can, actually, spend Christmas Eve with her children?

Tell her she's very lucky if that's her biggest concern.

mrskeithrichards · 10/12/2012 15:56

Just ignore her and yanbu. My friend is a nurse, no children but plenty of family and it sucks she's on the bottom of the list of Christmas day off. They assume she'll want G

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange · 10/12/2012 15:56

I think it is sad. Yes, you suck it up and get on with it but it's rough. FWIW, I always used to work Christmas for colleagues with children. If I could get New Year's off!

mrskeithrichards · 10/12/2012 15:57

Hogmanay off which isn't always the case.

MamaLazarou · 10/12/2012 15:58

YANBU. If she wanted the day off, she should have booked it off!

TrillsCarolsOutOfTune · 10/12/2012 15:59

She is being very silly and needs to drop into the grip shop while doing her Christmas shopping.

AMumInScotland · 10/12/2012 15:59

Presumably she could have taken leave if she had wanted to? Does she think that the boss should just say "Oh you have small children, take the day off on full pay, everyone else will cover for you"?

TheCortanaThatStoleChristmas · 10/12/2012 16:01

I'm with MrsTerry. She should suck it up but it doesn't mean she's not disappointed.

I fracture my ankle am I not allowed to moan if someone else breaks theirs? I'd be sad if I missed Christmas Eve or Day. I know some people have it worse, but so many people have it so much worse than all of us, if we all put things into perspective MN would be much quieter. [frgin]

Sorry your DH is working though and I hope you all have a lovely Chrismas.

Plus big Christmas shout out to all emergency services and health care professionals working Christmas day!

somuchslimmernow · 10/12/2012 16:02

I could understand if it was Chtistmas Day but Cristmas Eve and finish at 5, she needs to get a grip.

tethersjinglebellend · 10/12/2012 16:03

She wants to spend Christmas eve with her children?

The selfish bitch.

Another example of Broken Britain.

etc.

YuleBritannia · 10/12/2012 16:04

If she hoping that the more she moans, the more likely it is that someone with the day off will offer to cover Christmas Eve in her absence. Many of us have had to work Christmas Eve (I had a temporary job in M&S one Christmas and had to work Christmas Eve) and just got on with it. I've worked out that my DCs were 13 and 14 so I have to admit that they were not that young but still .......

Knittingnovice · 10/12/2012 16:06

DH volunteers and works, this year he is working 21st night, volunteering 22nd, working 22nd night, volunteering 23rd, working 23rd night then volunteering 24th. He will be back in work on 26th night.

He can't book it off, am I sad, yes because we have 2 DC's and I am going to be 23 weeks pg, do I think he is entitled to more time off because he has a family, NO. Before I fell pg I was searching and searching for a job and kept getting rejected because I was over qualified.

Your colleague could have booked AL and didn't she should suck it up.

Groovee · 10/12/2012 16:10

That's what annual leave is for.

My dh is working christmas day and I'm gutted but have sucked it up and desperately waiting on the TV times coming out for me and the children to plan our viewing.

BeataNoxPotter · 10/12/2012 16:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

honeytea · 10/12/2012 16:12

She is BU, does anyone in the office have Christmas Eve off?

My DP had the days around last Christmas off and this Christmas he was supposed to work to make up for the time off last year but I am due to give birth any day so he will be on paternity leave and they have to give him that time off. Companies just have to cope with these sorts of things, I can understand her being upset if it is her turn to have the time off but if she hasn't even tried she is just being silly.

kakapo · 10/12/2012 16:13

I would tell her that if anyone should get the time off, it's childless people. Because chances are they are the ones that are travelling to be with their families on Christmas Day. Just to ruffle her feathers.

I would also say Christmas is for everyone, not just the children. Loon!

baublesandbaileys · 10/12/2012 16:17

YAsoooNBU!

I have DCs but last year offered to change shifts so that a childless woman could have more of christmas off than me

  • she was an only child with a very ill mother who lived a long journey away and would be totally alone on christmas if the woman I worked with couldn't get enough time off to travel there - the mother was too ill to come to her! it may have been her last christmas!
My kids/home were 15 mins from my work place so I'd see them over christmas whatever shifts I worked!

childless people have families too!

maddening · 10/12/2012 16:19

She could take it as holiday so she is bu. Has she been denied annual leave for the day

3b1g · 10/12/2012 16:19

DH was working (not by choice) on DS1's first Christmas, so I took DS1 to visit him and brought some festive snacks for DH and his colleagues. Your colleague sounds a bit glass-half-empty.

DH also had to work the millenium night (again, not by choice). I was eight months pregnant and it was both DH's birthday and my birthday! The place he was working was one of the seven circles of hell even on your average Saturday night, so instead of visiting him, some lovely friends came and spent the evening with me and helped me walk (roll?) up the hill to watch the local fireworks.

He was given three shifts off for paternity leave and they counted the one in which I was in labour as one of the three!

RedHelenB · 10/12/2012 16:21

Prefer build up of Christmas eve to Christmas day with my kiddies so I can see where she is coming from tbh.

maddening · 10/12/2012 16:23

Ps my old employer used to let every one go as soon as possible depending obviously whether the job allowed - e.g. customer facing roles where as many people as poss were allowed to go keeping back minimal staff - but although people expected to go early it was never agreed till the last hour that you could go early so you had to assume you were in for the day - lots of people wouldn't take it as holiday as they preferred to get a few free hours.

Smellslikecatspee · 10/12/2012 16:23

Its a normal working day, tell her to suck it up or take leave.

Everyone can come up with a 'It's not fair situation'
I don't have children, but I do have aged parent so I should get the day off to travel to see her cause Christmas is all about family
or
Christmas is all about shopping I should get the day off as the shops are closed on Christmas Day.

Blah
Blah

Shes being daft

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