AIBU to think that telling 8-year-olds that Santa isn't real isn't a crime?

[hb84]

I just read about a primary school teacher in Dorset who is being vilified by parents and heavily criticised by his boss (who I personally think should stick up for him in this case) because he told a class of 8-year-olds that Santa Claus is not real. This was after a child in the class asked, so obviously there was already some doubt among the kids. I just can't understand why people are getting so outraged about it. Should he have lied about it? Why do children need to believe this? Also, do they really need to believe it past 8 years old?
Even as a small child I knew that Father Christmas was my dad. He would excuse himself, go outside and come back a couple of minutes later wearing a Santa hat and glasses (he had a beard already so didn't need to fake it) but I knew it was him. It didn't make Christmas any less special for my sisters or me, and meant that we still love Christmas now, even as adults. I get the same feeling now as I did when I was little, and it's to do with being at home with my family, giving and receiving presents and stuffing my face with delicious food.

Yes I did, probabaly with a few doubts at 10. Nothing wrong with my intellect by the way I was a very clever 10 year old just with a love of Christmas magic.

It has nothing at all to do with intellect.

What in the hell is wrong with people? Where is your Christmas spirit?

Obliged to lie? No. But equally, a response such as "I think you should talk to your parents about it" would have been a lot more appropriate.

Great job for ruining the magic of Christmas for a child early.

This thread is making me sad obviously people have their own ideas of Christmas and FC and whether or not to come clean about whether he is indeed real or not.
I think it's a great shame that the teacher in question ruined the magic for those children who still believe. As I said, my DS is 7 nearly 8 and he still firmly believes - and no way am I about to shatter his dream of that.
But, I respect others and understand that we are all different. The thread here was as to whether the teacher was BU or not. Personally I don't think it wan his place to tell a whole class of children this - no, he shouldn't have done that. It was not his place. But as parents you do as you see fit.
But each to their own and all that!
Oh, and Merry Fucking Christmas!!!

GetKnitted you are familiar with St Nicholas aren't you? Father Christmas didn't originate from the imaginations of parents and coca cola you know.

The teacher is obviously a bit dim if he couldn't deflect such a simple and easy to deflect question. "What do you think" is nice and simple.

I think yabu OP. It is not a crime, but a teacher should always consider the individual circumstances and sensitivities of young children and if they don't they should be villified and be made to consider their position as a teacher of young children.

I too would be absolutely fuming if my dd's teacher took it upon themselves to inform the whole class that FC isn't real from the question of one pupil.

Dd1 is 8 and does question whether FC is real but she still believes, 'cos she wants to. I would be very annoyed if another adult took that away from her.

She knows that all the Santas you see before xmas at grottos etc are not the real thing and are just men dressed up as FC. I've never tried to kid her on that one. I think it's reasonable to explain that these people are there to make the build up to xmas exciting and that very young children may believe that they are really Santa.

When she asks about whether he is real I tend to answer with questions of my own. Only this evening she mentioned something about him coming down the chimney and I asked how he might manage that - like is that really how it works? I also say to her that since it appears that no-one has never actually seen the real FC all the ideas of what he looks like, or is, could be way off. I don't expect her to believe the impossible and I am also not lying outright. It's almost like putting doubt in her mind, and I'm hoping she would wonder, being the intelligent girl that she is, why I would do that if I KNOW he isn't real. I want her to believe until she just cannot convince herself otherwise or until she finds out with solid evidence. It's the thing that puts the real excitement into xmas for children. Yes, xmas is still lovely once you know but the real, magical excitement has gone.

At the age of 8 I think that my dd (and most other kids) would be more likely to believe that FC brings her presents on xmas eve night than that we could, and would, conceivably afford and actually buy all these toys etc that they come down to on xmas morning. I like to feign slight annoyance that Santa has brought all this stuff when they already have enough and we don't have room for more. It all adds the to the image that I don't have anything to do with it.

Yabvu I'd be furious if a teacher told my 8 year old that, whether or not he still believes, it's not the teachers place.

YANBU
But I was never brought up to believe in FC and was actually jolly glad when my two stopped. DH insisted and all their friends did, so it was easier.

Reduced DD1 to tears over the tooth fairy, I had no idea that she had ever actually believed. I'm a crap tooth fairy, always forgetting so I was amazed when she was upset when I mentioned getting change for her little sister.

the teacher was a twat for doing that

I need to join the gang too. I have never had the conversation with my mum either and still hang my stocking up at her house on christmas eve.

OP YABU. It was not the teachers place to tell these kids. That is a parents job. I personally think that it isn't that people don't want to 'lie to their kids' but that they can't be bothered with the logistics of FC, hiding presents, dealing with children asking how he gets down the chimney etc.

If thats what you want to do with your own children, fair enough, different strokes for different folks and all that but if any grown up told my DC that he didn't exist I would be fuming.

I can't believe some people are so miserable and bitter about this. I am glad I did not grow up in those households.

And if that teacher said anything to my children, I would have made him apologise and say he made a mistake.

We are particularly fond of Santa in our house and always get lovely presents. And a note to the children on Christmas morning, so obviously feelings are reciprocated... His handwriting is a lot like DH's, but that just makes them both artistic...

Merry Christmas to fellow believers!!

I've always been a bit uncomfortable about upholding belief in Santa at all costs with my children. When my 7yo asked directly recently I said 'if you believe in him, he's real'. But I have also explained the origins of Santa a bit (we live in a country where St Nicholas' Day is celebrated, so these questions have come up) and as far as my children are concerned I get the impression it's an enjoyable fiction they don't believe in in the sense of thinking it's real, but happily collude in because it's fun and a bit magical.

I'm happy with that and wouldn't have seen fit to pillory this teacher if I had had a child in his class. An answer along the lines of my 'if you believe' above would have been preferable, but I think children have a great capacity for being able to know something isn't true, at whatever level, but still suspend their disbelief and enter into the magic of it - it's what most of their games revolve around, after all.

There is no reason why the media should make the teacher's life a misery over this.