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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Letting granny take kids to santa?

59 replies

muddledmamma · 07/12/2012 21:00

Hehehe this is a true unseasonable.

Ok. I've got my period so it's possible I'm BU. DP is taking DC's to in-laws this weekend without me. MIL wants to take them to see santa. My youngest is 3 and this is the first year he has a clue what's going on. I was kinda looking forward to doing that myself with him. DP thinks I'm unr/seasonable. What do you think? Cos like, I really don't think IBU, obv. Thank you, hormonesXmas Grin

OP posts:
legoballoon · 07/12/2012 21:01

I would just take him another time. He's 3. In a week's time he'll have forgotten what the other Santa looked like. Or even that he's been.

NervousAt20 · 07/12/2012 21:04

Before I had my DD I would have said "there'll be plenty of other years for you to take him" now I have my DD I'd say "YANBU your mummy and of course you want to be there and see his excited little face" Xmas Grin

HollyBerryBush · 07/12/2012 21:07

Innit, tho, but, like, so not like, innit?

edwinbear · 07/12/2012 21:10

I feel a bit like this about dh taking ds to see my in laws next weekend. They are flying (within the UK) to save time and I'm staying at home with dd as there is too much baby stuff that needs to go with her for a flight for a short weekend. ds loves aeroplanes, he will stand at a window plane spotting for an hour and whilst he has flown as a baby, this is the first time he will get on a plane and actually 'experience' it. I really wish I was going to be able to watch his little face. But, I'm telling myself he shouldn't miss out just because I want to see him enjoy himself if that makes sense. I am a bit envious though. YANBU but you probably should suck it up and try and take him again yourself if you can.

breatheslowly · 07/12/2012 21:11

YANBU - DH and I will be taking DD and wouldn't miss it.

baublesandbaileys · 07/12/2012 21:12

you can still take them, DS saw about 3 santas when he was that age with various different people, I went to one of them, he loved them all!

BOFingSanta · 07/12/2012 21:15

I'd just take him again, presuming he enjoys it- lots of little kids get terrified and bawl their eyes out Xmas Grin.

At this sort of age they see Father Christmas loads of times: at nursery, at community parties, maybe you have a Rotary Club sleigh that visits your street, handing out leaflets at the shopping centre, all over the darn place really! I don't think it's worth getting too precious about- it won't be a big deal "first" to him.

Original poster
muddledmamma · 07/12/2012 21:21

Mmm, yeah I could still take him but his big bro is 8 and it's maybe his last year as a believer. I know I'm a bit sentimental but I just think it's kinda (yes, hollyberrybush, KINDA) special and I want to wanna be there.

Edwinbear, I totally sympathise. BIG day for your LO. Ask for lots of pictures!

OP posts:
baublesandbaileys · 07/12/2012 21:23

its such a shame that people would have kids miss out on a nice activity with their GPs,

santa isn't less magical to a 3 year old if its the 10th one they've seen this year so there's lots of chances for parents to bring LOs

naturalbaby · 07/12/2012 21:26

My 3yr old went last year - he was 2 and a bit at the time and he talked a lot about it. It was quite a significant moment in his little life, and quite special for me too!

seeker · 07/12/2012 21:26

Never mind that- I want to know what stuff a baby needs which means it can't go on an aeroplane!

roundtable · 07/12/2012 21:32

My mil is taking my pfb for his first santa visit and then for a special tea.

No biggie, they'll be other times and he'll have a special memory of his grandparent which I think is important.

edwinbear · 07/12/2012 21:33

seeker ssshhhhhhh it's my excuse for not spending a weekend with the in laws

LynetteScavo · 07/12/2012 21:36

FFS, everybody knows it's not the real Father Christmas in those grottos you pay for. (Although your 3yo may be momentarily fooled)

The real FC is busy preparing for Christmas.

ceeveebee · 07/12/2012 21:39

Wouldn't bother me, sounds like a nice thing for the GPs to do with their GCs.

Floggingmolly · 07/12/2012 21:40

If it's so important to "see his excited little face", go with them. I presume you're not actually being deliberately excluded?

Original poster
muddledmamma · 07/12/2012 21:47

baublesandbaileys If I would have them miss out on nice activities with their GPs I just wouldn't let them go. They are good GPs and they'll have a fab time whatever they do. From my POV it's the first xmas for the youngest and probably the last for the for the eldest. Another year I'd probably feel differently about it.

Lynette, I have amazing pics of my eldest with santa - he's completely in awe and he's aged 5/6. Hell, I get impressed by a righteous santa! :)

OP posts:
Original poster
muddledmamma · 07/12/2012 21:49

Floggingmolly, it wasn't me who said 'excited little face' but I must admit it did bring a smile to my face thinking about it. Of course I'm not deliberately excluded but the way things have happened I can't make it this time.

OP posts:
PoppyWearer · 07/12/2012 21:50

My MIL took my DC1 to see Father Christmas for the first time without asking me when she was about 15mo. I was livid! I had really wanted to be there and see her face.

Anyway, as it turns out DC1 was scared, albeit too young to remember, and MIL failed to take a decent photo of it, so I have chosen to erase the whole episode from family history. It never happened.

I understand where you're coming from OP, I would want to be there too. Can you make other arrangements and go together?

FWIW this year (DC1 is 4yo now) I let MIL take her without me, because I know DC1 just spends the whole time cowering from the man in red and then snatches the present away. MIL didn't seem to enjoy it much. Wink

DowagersHump · 07/12/2012 21:55

Why would you be livid that a granny took a baby that was too young to know what was going on to see santa? Confused

I think YABU OP - take your DS to see another santa on another day :)

Floggingmolly · 07/12/2012 22:01

That's a bit extreme, Poppy. Even if your dc had loved the first experience of seeing Santa at 15 months, she wouldn't remember it now!
And you had such an issue with it that you tried to re write history Hmm

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 07/12/2012 22:05

Good God people are so bloody precious Hmm

YABU OP, they are trying to do something nice FFS!

exoticfruits · 07/12/2012 22:14

Sounds nice to me- just go another time if you want to go.

seeker · 07/12/2012 22:37

Poppy wearer, that's really horrible Sad.

Original poster
muddledmamma · 07/12/2012 22:47

Poppywearer, I don't think that's horrible. I totally get that if a relationship is a little strained (like mine is with MIL) then you take your satisfaction where you can ;) Horrible would be if you were open about it, but a bit of quiet satisfaction never hurt anyone.

Thanks everyone for your input. It's been really helpful. Do you know what? Even if IABU, I WANT to be the one taking my kids to see santa this year. I don't think it's precious. It's a big deal when you're a little one and when they remember it I want them to remember me there. I would be more than happy for us all to go another time but for this weekend, when I can't go, I'm gonna say no. If they want to come, they can come another weekend.

OP posts:
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