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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What's the most rude thing anyone has ever said/done to you?

284 replies

gail734 · 07/12/2012 15:08

OK, I know it's not really an AIBU, but it features people being definitely U! I was just putting on some eyeshadow (as you do) and I remembered this: a) years ago, I was in a noisy pub and drunk man said to his wife, "Look at this girl, isn't she lovely?" His wife looked right at me and said, "She would be if she'd learn to do her eye makeup right." Still no idea what was wrong with my eye makeup, so presumably am still making the same terrible mistake!

b) I once went on a very short taxi journey and the fare was £5. I gave the taxi driver £5.50, ie a 10% tip. He looked down at it and said, (I kid you not) "That's not much of a tip." I just went, "Thanks! Bye!"

c) My boyfriend gave me a pair of earrings for my birthday. I said to my friend, "Oh, I see you're looking at my earrings. DP gave me them for my birthday." "Is that ALL he gave you?" "Yes. They ARE real." (They were pearls.) She then said, "Oh. They don't LOOK real."

d) I was once flashed at. A proper, open-up-your-brown-raincoat flash. I was about 23, and it was right in the centre of the city, in broad daylight. The thing was, the flasher was a bit of an amateur and got the timing wrong. He let me get too close to him before opening up the raincoat. I didn't look down, so I didn't see anything. Still rude though. Or am I being over-sensitive?

OP posts:
PatButchersEarring · 08/12/2012 17:49

Pinky

I don't want to belittle your experience, and obviously I wasn't there- but when I read that, it just sounds to me like the barmen were having a laugh but not at your expense...it sounds just like a play on words that they were making, just to pass the time, and could have/would have said it to/in the vicinity of anyone. I could be wrong, but I would hate for someone to be feeling bad about a fly away remark that wasn't even aimed at them...

Mine? said by an ex 'If I didn't know you, I'd fancy you'

..and more recently (from a mother of one of DD's friend's)

'You could never cope with 2 kids. You should just get sterilised now'.

Charmed, I'm sure!

AViewfromtheFridge · 08/12/2012 17:53

Girl on hen do: Are you wearing false eyelashes?
Me (pleased): Oh, no, actually!
Girl: Didn't think so.

Bitch.

Actually, I had a really toxic friend in my mid teens who made a point of telling me nasty thing other people had said about me. Clearly there must be a lot of them around.

SeasonallySnowyPeasant · 08/12/2012 18:14

"You look, wow, amazing, and everyone says how lucky I am to have such a beautiful girlfriend, but you just don't have the personality to match." - exBf explaining why he was breaking up with me :(

GilmoursPillow · 08/12/2012 18:16

Leaving a pub after 'pulling' a man I'd liked for what felt like years, his brother came up to us and said 'For fuck's sake, if you just want a shag fine but at least chose someone decent not her '

That reminds me. About 23 years ago I'd had a short fling with a guy. I found out later he'd denied he'd ever had anything to do with me and said, "I could do better than that on a bad night."
Arsehole.

gussiegrips · 08/12/2012 18:21

Mine was from my torn face SIL - we have daughters a year apart.

My daughter was a beautiful baby. Really, she should have been stuck on the wrapper of something to flog it.

Her wee cousin, meanwhile, is not one of life's wee sparkles. A trait she inherited from her silly mother who declared at my daughter's Blessing:

"You know, it's really interesting. Most beautiful babies grow up to be really plain children"

Oh, feck off.

GenericNameChange · 08/12/2012 18:25

At my nan's funeral (my mum's mum), one of her 90 year old friends told my mum and everyone else who would listen that my mum had gotten really fat, hadn't she?

AT HER OWN MOTHER'S FUNERAL Angry

And he was totally compos mentis. Old bastard.

CalamityJ · 08/12/2012 18:28

I want to caveat mine with the fact that I'm still in touch with the lady and she's really lovely except when she said...

"You know you could be a model. You've got the figure and it's amazing what they can do with make up these days."

Wink I took it in the spirit it was intended but I do love rolling it out when people talk about backhanded compliments!

deleted203 · 08/12/2012 18:35

Has to be my MIL - she's had many beauties over the years. I particularly remember

"You're not at ALL the sort of person I hoped my son would marry"

"Look at the SIZE of you! You've piled weight on!" (having not seen her for 3 months)

along with many other comments about "Look at the state of your windows"...."Look at the cobwebs in here"....."This room needs decorating"

Clearly I am a fat, idle cow with the wrong type of personality.

ToriaHosannaHeadacheChelsea · 08/12/2012 18:35

To me and a friend as we stood looking at underwear in a shop.

"Well look at you pair of fat fucks. Haven't you ever heard of a diet?"

guccigirl666 · 08/12/2012 18:38

Shortly after I gave birth and before all the privacy settings kicked in on Facebook a random man messaged me saying "19 years old and you have a baby you disgust me". I'll never forget how upset I was, shaking and crying. I genuinely thought everyone would judge me the same way. I'm very pleased to say that has not been the case.

Oh and I replied to man in question saying "26 years old being so rude and judgmental you disgust me" before blocking him, ugh.

goodmum123 · 08/12/2012 18:57

I've had some corners too!
1, when I was 17 with terrible acne and about to start on to start roaccurane treatment at hospital an old bastard said to me whilst I was serving him in woolworths. My god your skin is bl

goodmum123 · 08/12/2012 19:00

Bloody awful

2, called a fat fuck online by my Nasty bil because he was drunk and he fell out with my husband (I am overweight but don't need that)

3, when telling my fil that were having a girl, oh dear, better luck next time.

Nice eh ?

goodmum123 · 08/12/2012 19:01

*corkers bloody iPhone

JaponicaTroggs · 08/12/2012 19:27

I'm a sahm with a special needs child. Had some charming comments from my sister.
Whilst playing a film quiz board game one Christmas, which I won, "No wonder you got all the answers right, you have so much time to sit around all day watching films". DH was gobsmacked.
someone asking if I would be having any more children, "She can't manage the one she's got already"
On mentioning how hard things had been lately with ASD DS, "Well all kids are difficult aren't they?"
On me losing weight, "Well, no wonder, you're a lady of leisure who's got plenty of time to spend at the gym". Angry

Pandemoniaa · 08/12/2012 19:31

On having the Serious Talk with the very definitely not "d"ex-husband he interrupted the first sentence with:

"Thank fuck for that, I've disliked you and your vile children for years".

freerangeeggs · 08/12/2012 19:41

Pinky, I agree, I don't think that was necessarily a comment on your weight

acsec · 08/12/2012 19:54

I was with my SIL and DNeice (she was about 6months) bumped into a horrid colleague of mine who said "OOOh isn't DN gorgeous, she definitely takes after SIL's side of the family, I thought you said she looked like you acsec, when you were a baby?!" Clearly colleague thinks Im a minger!

NanFucker · 08/12/2012 19:55

God this thread is reminding me of more:

Just had a mc, was quite young, baby not planned (contraception failure), but was still v upset and in shock.... MIL came in to meas I was crying and said:

"Well its for the best, I'm too young to be a Granny" Shock

BoatysTinselSails · 08/12/2012 20:04

Hmm, this is thread is compulsive reading! Why are there so many vile people out there! Xmas Shock
My example: SIL I will omit the D 'your kids all have different dads don't they?' err...NO! They are all DHs!!! we were on benefits at the time her judgy pants were hoiked and she reads Daily Fail
I admit I retaliated with " You are on your 2nd husband aren't you? so that means by default you have had more men that me!" Grin I knew her ex was still a sore point even though she was with my DB! [evil]

shutitweirdo · 08/12/2012 20:15

I lost about 3 stone and my friend said I looked like i was about to die. When i asked who a bloke was as i recognised him my boss said 'probably knew him from when you worked the streets'. When i was getting measure for glasses the lady said don't ever try and but a hat.

TalkinPeace2 · 08/12/2012 20:23

Funny one : Its nice to see you keep your own house as messy as you kept mine

Vicious one : I did not want you monopolising the conversation
(for why she did not tell me my uncle was in the country)

Sad one : it wont last
(4 years into what is now a 28 year relationship)

Nasty one: For once the front of your house does not look scruffy

Thanks Mum.

HazleNutt · 08/12/2012 20:30

I would like to have dogs too, but I don't want my house to smell like yours -

said by a person whose house would scare even Kim and Aggie. I was so shocked I forgot to reply that I don't think a little wet dog smell would really be a problem.

MustStopOutingSelf · 08/12/2012 20:31

I actually thought this was rather funny, even though it was rude. I went to have my coil put in a few months after DD2 was born -
Doctor - My goodness, look at your episiotomy scar, isn't it huge!
Me - Err, yes they did cut a bit bigger than last time...
Doctor - Cut a bit bigger?! Is your child Stewie Griffin?!

And a bit sad -
My Mum commenting on what a happy baby DD2 is
DM - "Well I suppose it helps you're not < whispers > unwell this time (I had PND with DD1). I suppose thats why DD1 is the way she is."
Me - "Err? The way she is? A happy, confident, articulate toddler?"
DM - < backpeddles > "Oh no! I just meant she's a bit of a wimp!"
Me - Shock

(To be fair she is a wimp and a bit of a drama queen but I'm pretty sure my PND didn't cause that!)

chickensarmpit · 08/12/2012 20:34

A customer at work pulled a grey hair off my head. It was my first and only grey hair, i was gutted.

HeathRobinson · 08/12/2012 20:44

Two young men talking about me, loudly enough so I overheard.

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed for the first half an hour'.