To message my DB and tell him he is a thoughtless twat?

[balia]

Two weeks ago my DB rang our folks and said he (and his DW and DD) would be coming up this weekend (just gone). My DM cancelled work, DF bought a huge joint and they both sat and waited. And waited.

DB didn't turn up. DM texted - just a general 'how is the weather' type thing - and the reply convinced her that they had forgotten, so she didn't mention it.

FFS. DB very rarely makes the effort but expects DP's to be on parade when he wants them (eg Christmas). I know I am lucky to live near my folks and have all the support they give us - but DB is only a couple of hours away.

Should I message DB and say something? Or leave it?

I wouldn't reply to SIL - I'd phone DB and give him a rollocking once I had read the pathetic reasons SIL had given for their no show.

It's a lack of respect and if I thought my brother was being disrespectful to our parents I'd tell him, (not his wife they aren't her parents) and I'd be telling him loud and with rude words. Just as he would me if the situation were reversed.

Why is everyone in your family pandering to this grown up brat?

Don't text. Call. And say 'You are a selfish git. If you don't send mom and dad flowers by the end of today and call and apologize you will be hearing from me again and it won't be nearly so pleasant.'

Seriously. He acts like this because he has no reason not to. Give him a reason not to.

If one of my brothers or sisters did this, they would hear from me loud and long.

Kalisi it would appear mom and dad don't pick up the phone to chat and/or confirm with this grown up brat. Who knows why? And 'I forgot' is not an acceptable excuse in this, or really any, case. Buy a freakin' calendar and use it. Or, most likely, just look at your smart phone!

He / they sound very selfish. I think they owe your parents a big apology, and I am shocked that you have to suggest it to them.

I'd unleash hell on either of my brothers if they did this but your family dynamic sounds very different to mine.
But there is nothing to stop you fighting your parents corner here so I think you should talk to him about this.

Sorry to be morbid but at some point in the future you may need his help with your parents and he needs to take some responsibility now or he never will.