Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

Parents supplying teens with alcohol

124 replies

dinkybinky · 02/12/2012 17:33

One of the parents at school gave their DS a bottle of vodka to take to a party, he ended up in A&E and had to have his stomach pumped. Apparently there are quite a few parents that think its acceptable to give children under 16 alcohol and do so every weekend. AIBU to think that this is totally irresponsible ?

OP posts:

dexter73 · 02/12/2012 20:51

I would rather my dd was drinking alcohol than taking crack/heroin tbh. I do not see the comparison.

SenClayDavis · 02/12/2012 20:53

binky, you really can't extrapolate the entire nation's drinking habits based on the UK club scene. The most you can tell from that is the drinking habits of a section of UK society i.e. those that go clubbing on a weekend.

Alisvolatpropiis · 02/12/2012 20:58

saski "friend parents" not just mums are quite quite sad. Allowing your child an alcopop doesn't make you a "friend" parent though.

dexter73 · 02/12/2012 20:59

Saski - wait until your children become teenagers and you will find that your ideas of what you thought you would do could change. I do not try to be my daughters friend and I am certainly not pathetic. The man that my dd was buying alcohol from is from a well known family where I live. My dh was going to report him to the police for supplying alcohol to underage children. He googled his name and it turned out he has a police record as long as your arm including GBH, ABH and intimidating a witness so we decided not to report him as we feared for what he could do to our dd. Buying her a few drinks for a party is a small price to pay for keeping her away from this sort of person.

Saski · 02/12/2012 20:59

^^I'm can't see why any reasonable parent would provide an alcopop.

Original poster

dinkybinky · 02/12/2012 21:08

Young people are less well equipped than adults to cope with the effects of alcohol, physically and emotionally. The same amount of alcohol will have a much greater effect on the body of a child or young person than on an adult, because their bodies are still growing and developing. Also, a young person doesn't have the experience needed to deal with the effects of alcohol on judgement and perception.

Young people go out and binge drink its embarrassing to see Brits in Ibiza and Spain or at the weekends in the UK. I really think there needs to be tougher laws on young people drinking before the age of 18.

OP posts:

Alisvolatpropiis · 02/12/2012 21:09

saski feel free to tell mine that they were unreasonable as I've turned out so badly and all...

dexter73 · 02/12/2012 21:13

Why do you keep googling things and copying and pasting them onto here? Your first paragraph is just copied from the Talk about Alcohol website. We all know about the dangers of alcohol but are trying to do our best to bring up our children by introducing them to alcohol and educating them as to how much is safe to drink.

Startail · 02/12/2012 21:15

We drank at 14-15 as the pubs and disco bars would serve us, but we couldn't afford to get drunk.

Only time I did was on a bottle of cider bought by an elder friend when new landlord tightened the rules.

No way would any of our parents have bought us bottles of booze.

I can't think DD1 (14) friends parents would. She's allowed a bit of what we are having, but I wouldn't contemplate offering her best friends alcohol and they are 16.

However, she isn't the sort of teen who gets invited to her comprehensive class mates parties, where, I'm sure thinks are very different.

The local park certainly is.

Fifis25StottieCakes · 02/12/2012 21:15

Interesting that the parent's who drank as teens are the ones who are more inclined to let their kids drink at home supervised. I shudder at the situation's i got myself into when drunk. I could have wound up dead or raped or with alcohol poisoning. I don't know what i will do with my dd's as the eldest is 11 but i do know i don't want her putting herself in the situations i put myself in. My parents had no idea how bad i was and they were horrified when i told them when i was older

Saski · 02/12/2012 21:15

Dexter - You should note that I'm not saying anything like, "I'm sure my kids will not drink underage". I've been a mother long enough to have had the hubris kicked out of me. What I am saying is, "I shall not buy alcohol for my kids." I am 100% certain that I will stand firmly by this position.

dexter73 · 02/12/2012 21:18

Saski - tbh I never thought I would buy alcohol for my dd, but I have now as I think it is preferable to her buying possibly fake alcohol from a known criminal.

cory · 02/12/2012 21:24

My FIL, born in 1909, did his best to encourage teen dh-to-be to learn to enjoy beer and was crestfallen when he preferred soft drinks. I don't think that was about being your child's best friend parenting, more about wanting to make a man out of him, according to pre-WW2 notions.

cory · 02/12/2012 21:26

dinkybinky Sun 02-Dec-12 21:08:34

"Young people go out and binge drink its embarrassing to see Brits in Ibiza and Spain or at the weekends in the UK. I really think there needs to be tougher laws on young people drinking before the age of 18. "

So if Brits behave differently to the natives of Ibiza and Spain (I thought Ibiza was in Spain), is that because the Spaniards have really tough laws against young people drinking before the age of 18?

Abra1d · 02/12/2012 21:29

'Add message | Report | Message poster Saski Sun 02-Dec-12 20:03:43
But you would send a 14 year old with alcohol if the parents were OK with it? Sheesh. What's wrong with people?'

Saski, My 14-year-old doesn't take drink anywhere, or drink at home. My son of 16 drinks an occasional beer with us at home. He does not take drink anywhere. Find someone else to pick a fight with, not someone who does not approve of underage drinking.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 02/12/2012 21:29

Ooh is the op back for another of her moral outrage/we're all going to hell in a handcart/aren't the youth of today awful threads?
((Yawn))

Saski · 02/12/2012 21:41

Abra, here's what you wrote:
But I wouldn't send teenagers of 14 to 16 to other people's homes with alcohol without checking with the parents that is fine. I would be furious if people brought vodka into my house for underage children whom I was responsible for without telling me.

Abra1d · 02/12/2012 21:51

" A beer or shandy or glass of wine with a family meal is fine. '

Is what I wrote too!

freddiefrog · 02/12/2012 21:52

I personally wouldn't give my 14 year old daughter a bottle of vodka to take to a party, no.

My eldest is only 11 so it's not something I've had to deal with yet, but I will be taking the same approach as my parents did with me when she's older. The odd glass of wine with lemonade with Sunday roast, a snowball at Christmas, etc. as I got older mum bought me a couple of bottles of Hooch or a bottle of Pink Lady to take to a party. All my friends parents had the same approach and none of us turned into binge drinkers vomiting in the gutter every weekend.

Abra1d · 02/12/2012 21:52

And it was your rude and dismissive comment that hacked me off.

Original poster

dinkybinky · 02/12/2012 22:02

Anyway please think twice before giving alcohol to your child. It was horrible to see a child being taken away in a ambulance.

OP posts:

dexter73 · 02/12/2012 22:05

I don't think anyone would give their children alcohol without a second thought. Nobody wants to see a child being taken away in an ambulance which is why we are trying to teach our children to be careful with alcohol.

OpheliaPayneAgain · 02/12/2012 22:17

Its a 14 year old child. Apparently 80% of children at that age drink regularly at weekends. I find it shocking.

Quantify that statistic please.

Feminine · 02/12/2012 22:33

My 5 siblings (from second relationship) on Dad's side, drink very regularly- normally from about 13!

The youngest is 16 and my step mum buys him alcohol to take to parties.

My sister (now 19) consumes huge amounts of alcohol, binges actually.

Its been encouraged since they were small :(

The whole family drink everyday, so I guess its not surprising. My eldest is 14, and was 'treated' to a few beers while we stayed with them.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5