To have asked a 4 year old and 2 year old to let me sit down in the Doctors pharmacy?

[CandyLoo]

At a small, tightly packed, busy pharmacy opposite Doctors surgery.
3 chairs (barely any standing room).
A lady, and the 2 children taking up the 3 chairs.
2 children not ill, in there with their Mum collecting a prescription.
No free chairs, I asked if I could sit in one of the chairs.
Mum moved one of her children, the other moved to stand with her sister.
Mutterings from the lady next to me, and when she left, said rather pointedly to the child, 'Here you are love, sit in my seat'. They left soon after.
By this stage, the pharmacy was very busy, I have no qualms giving up my seat to anyone older than me or simply if anyone needs it.
AIBU? The lady sitting next to me obviously thought I was, rude comments about me to her husband when she was outside.

I agree netguru.

Netguru Do you not think everybody is tired at the end of the day. Why are your aching feet different from anybody elses? I would say your being entitled wanting them to give up their seat for you.

You selfish entitled person.

I'm sure you've been given enough of a roasting in this thread, but had to add my piece.

Why does being older automatically entitle you to a seat?

Get these toddlers onto Jeremy Kyle. They need the Wizard before all hope is lost.

Oh and no way would I allow any of my dc under say 8 to stand the whole of the bus journey because of your aching feet. You as a healthy adult should be able to stand and keep your balance, my dc wouldn't. they are fine standing up on the tube now being 5 and 6 but no way on a bus.

Netguru bollocks.

I too have to journey, with tired aching feet after a 14 shift, but would never expect a child to give up their seat for me. Why should they? They can be perfectly polite, but why should they have to sacrifice something just to show politeness? I don't think they do. They're entitled to a seat just as much as we are. There isn't a tiredness scale, there isn't a rule that whoevers most tired should get a seat. If we're healthy human beings with no disabilities or illnesses hindering us, there's no god damn reason we should expect a child to give up a seat. And I would be thoroughly ashamed of myself if I let a toddler or a young child give up their seat just so I could sit my ass down.

Maybe its a generation thing, but we don't live in the times were children should be seen or not heard. They are not second class citiziens, and should be treated so.

But just because people did something in the past doesn't necessarily make it right though, does it?

I would absolutely ask my child to stand for someone elderly / infirm / disabled / pregnant etc - when the 5 year old asked why (as he always does), simple answer being that they need it more than you!

But why should they give up their seat for a healthy, young adult? I am 37 so basically same age, and it just wouldn't even enter my head to contemplate asking small children (or for that matter anyone) to move from a seat they were already on.

I think it must be a generational thing. I would certainly find it very impolite for a child not to give up a seat, and would expect mine to (as my mum would have expected me to). Shall teach my grandchildren to as well.

My DC are polite as in they say please, thankyou (yes to the bus driver) hold doors open, don't chew with their mouths open, say excuse me and ask to leave the table after dinner, the table they wouldn't even dare put their elbows on. Does not mean they are rude and bad mannered not giving their seats that they got before you up!

I'd have made a "rude comment" about you too.

I was taught to always stand up for an elderly or disabled person or if someone clearly looked worn out or had lots of bags, or a lady with 2 small children perhaps!

On a long train journey there is no WAY i would expect a small kid to stand the whole way for me to sit however tired I was - but I would appreciate if the child could sit on the mothers lap. But I wouldnt be frothing if it didnt happen as you have to pay for a child too!

Waiting for a script in a pharmacy! Come on! Seriously. As IF a healthy fit person cant stand for 5 mins to get their prescription.

Well I would agree with that Everlong, although would always expect my own to move.

I wouldn't take a seat off your grandchildren jimjams, but I would think they were cute.

I find it ironic that the OP thinks "pampered little darlings" shouldn't be allowed to stay on a seat they were already occupying when she arrived somewhere but she as an able bodied adult should be allowed to demand to sit down and have that demand met immediately.

YANBU. Kids move for adults.

I said I don't ask. Instead I look at kids in seats but NOT using them and wish that their parents would reorganise things so I or any other adult can sit down.

Quite how this makes me entitled or rude I simply don't know. But to be honest a lot of the views on this thread leave me despairing. The OP had neck in asking, to be honest good manners would stop me from doing the same but good manners on the part of the parent would have left the OP with a seat in the first place.

I've commuted for twenty years through three pregnancies. From the first trimester where fatigue is bad but no bump to show. I'm trying for another child. God knows how I'll cope again but mustn't expect the children to vacate a seat or share.

Oh. And for all those saying the children were not bad mannered - I quite agree. At that age they need to be encouraged to have good manners. Seems the mother had good manners too, arranging things when asked. Just the busy body in the chemist and the coven in here who, even if unaffected, take issue.

As an aside, I have a question to all those who said they would give their seats for elderly, pregnant or disabled.

What if the disability is something you cannot see? I have M.E. I am 31. I look like a fit healthy woman but I am not. I generally feel knackered and like shit but you can't tell that by looking at me and I certainly don't ask people to move for me. I think I would get a .

OP, YABU. You clearly could have stood up, there is nothing bloody wrong with you except you are lazy. As someone who would love to be able to just stand for a while without aching like mad, people like you piss me off. I would also prefer my children to be sat out of the way then trying to run around a busy shop (unless someone who clearly needed it was there). Although I would be on the seat anyway with my youngest on my lap but that is besides the point.

I can only go by my childhood (in my late 20s), but my siblings and I were always asked to give up our seat on public transport, etc if an adult wanted it. I remember this being annoying, as I might have been tired, but it was all part of respecting our elders. This included a bus - and no, we didn't fall over! I assume if one of us was too young, we sat on our mother's lap?

I'm not sure I would now ask a child to give up their seat for me, I would leave it up to the parent to make that call. I do believe I would insist my DD sits on my lap to make way for another adult without a seat, however.

BUt crapbag you wouldn't have to ask or explain your condition to us because if ds2 or ds3 had a seat I would make them move just by you being a grown up.

If someone asked me who was the same age as me I would have to assume they needed it.

I'm working on the premise that you wouldn't ask another adult unless you needed it.

But you would have to ask, as it cant be helped that you are not visibly in need. Cant see a way around that.

Alright JimJams what if it was an invisibly disabled youngster then?

You cant be Peter Perfect and provide a seat for every eventuality in life, impossible.

I think its quite obvious when someone is being a seat snark or asking through need.