to think my 6yr old is too young for a 'pamper party'?

[kimster]

Hmm. I'm having a dilemma! DD is 6yrs old and has been invited to a 'pamper party' at a local beauty salon. I have a bit of an issue about girls being praised and admired for their physical appearance at such a young age (i work with teenage girls who have issues with their weight and image so see the effect it can have on them)and although she's allowed a bit of nail varnish now and then, we are trying to develop her self worth in a variety ways other than how 'pretty' she is.

So, should i let her go?

Anyone's views on this would be appreciated to help me get some perspective! I can't help thinking she's too young...

Thank you!

I can't get worked up about them if that's what the parents think is suitable for their own child. However, I would refuse the invitation because it doesn't really fit with how I'd like my DD's to see how females fit into society. Mainly that it's important how they look.

But I am not keen on them doing things like ballet either which forces them to watch themselves in a mirror and critique their bodies either. Much rather they get into a sport or any other form of art really.

YANBU. Fine for adults who will take it with a pinch of salt but for a child of 6? Completely unnecessary and slightly disturbing. I'd create a legitimate excuse to not go so that you're not making an issue about it though.

It is just 1 party. But you could break everything down like that. It's the cumulative effect of all this white which is the problem

And this is the mums choice of party...no way would a 6 year old come up with that. A 6 yo doesn't know owt about 'pampering'

Oh! and I wouldn't make any deal out of DD's not going I would quickly book something else fun in and politely decline.

It accumulates until you end up looking like someone from TOWIE fake

I wouldn't host one but have let both dds go to them around this age.

They usually end up bored anyway but by not letting her go ( if she really wants to) then that's over the top in my opinion.

Yabu. Pampering is for all. I have seen pig ugly women with wonderfully well kept nails etc. Nails that I could only dream of! No real correlation between pampering and pushing being beautiful.

Pampering is for us old has-beens, whose bodies and lives are ravaged by child birth and child care, when we have limited time and need a quick feel-good fix

Young 'ubs and the child free should be enjoying being young and vital

I certainly didn't pampered until my 30s. Spent my time and cash on doing

For kids, its just ridiculous

thebody, why should OP sell herself down the line to appease her child? That just sends out a message that its OK.

Its not fucking OK, it's a ridiculous idea for a party for 6 year olds perpetuated by seriously dim parents who encourage a load of mini-mes at an age when they should be enjoying childhood. If they get bored, I'm hardly surprised.

What does pampering actually mean?

Its a party not a beauty contest. She will have her nails painted, bit of lip gloss and her hair styled a bit. Hardly going to turn her into the next Jordan.

My Dsis owns a salon so my DD now 9 has been around this stuff most of her life. When we go to special occasions she dresses up and does the above but the rest of the time she isn't bothered if her hair is brushed never mind anything else.

I think if you put an emphasis on these things she will probably rebel in the future anyway. Turn something into a taboo and it makes it much more exciting when they are allowed to choose for themselves.

Op doesn't need to sell herself down the line to appear anyone. She asked for opinions and I have her mine.

After 4 kids 2 grown up and 2 teens I have learned to pick battle lines on important stuff( a 6 year olds birthday party isn't one)

And second if you ban things they want them more.

One pamper party isn't going to turn a 6 year old into an orange wag.

I would advise you to not get too over excited over a one off party sir sugar.. Really isn't worth it.

Ridiculous idea for a party of 6 year olds. It's so sad that the current fashion seems to be to encourage dc to grow up way sooner than necessary.

If my dd really wanted to go I would probably allow it, on the understanding that it was a one off special treat. It would really stick in my throat though.

Nothing wrong with a foot rub and some toe polish. Whether you admit to it or not we all 'conform' to a degree with regard to appearance (men and women). For example, you would dress appropriately for a job interview and be sure to look clean/smart/well turned out/your best. Much ado about nothing, IMHO.

It's a foot rub and make up party? For small children?

It wouldn't be my choice of party and I also think it's too adult, too young but when my dd was invited to one for a 7th birthday party last year, I let her go. She had a great time. Pick your battles!

It's thoroughly "ick"

Apart from anything else, the word "pampering" makes my skin crawl.

But I think you should let her go.

I let my ds go to an "army" party at about this age, even though it went against all my beliefs and ideals. He had the best time.

Thebody, I own a hair salon; when DD was 10 I threw a party where we did their hair and I got a photographer in to take some really good photos and they all got a CD with their photos and a group photo. I did not use makeup and the hair was age appropriate.

At 6 years, I took DD and friends to a play centre, which was age appropriate

Yes and I agree its not my idea of a party. My Dcs usually had sporty parties or swimming etc but I don't see it's so offensive to refuse the invite if asked and kid wants to go.

Property - You describe another human being as 'pig ugly'. And you are a fan of 6 year olds being preened. Says it all for me.

I'd let my 6 year old go.

DD3 is 6 and would LOVE it. As long as they're not planning to wax her legs, give her HD crayoned on eyebrows and spray tan her it wouldn't bother me.

I see it as one step on from face painting; instead of being a sparkly butterfly she'd have sparkly clips in her hair and garish pink nails!

I wouldn't do it myself for any of my DDs birthday parties but I wouldn't stop them going to someone else's.

My Mum wasn't really into all that, but I stayed with my Auntie once, and she took me to the hairdressers and they shampooed and blow dried my hair. I felt so special, it was a lovely treat. I sort of knew that it was a one off, and not a daily occurrence. Don't think it did me any harm, it was a nice experience for me. My 5 year old occasionally gets a make over by older cousins, and parades about giggling, but its just a bit of fun, she doesn't show much interest in it at home. Seems a shame to rob your daughter of a fun experience with her friends.

I wouldn't be keen on the idea but I wouldn't want her to miss out if all her friends are going. It's just a party, they'll probably just paint her nails and do a bit of sparkly lip gloss or something

DD1 wants one of these for her next birthday so I have looked into it, in the salon here they put some nice clips and sparkly bits in their hair, paint their nails, put on some lip gloss and they let them make a bracelet and set out some sweets and juice and play some pop music. Seems pretty harmless to me as a one off. I know of a 4yo who goes in to a salon with her Mum every week to get a manicure and her hair straightened/curled thats more worrying imo.