To put DC, aged 8 and 9, in Economy while I fly in Club with a 2yo and the nanny

[firemansamisnormansdad]

OK, so it wasn't actually me. But I boarded a flight from the USA yesterday and was shocked that this Mom did this to her own children. I have heard that people do this. Is there ever any real justification? My DH was sitting next to them and the little girl was getting quite scared at the turbulence. The Mom said that she would send the nanny down and swap places with DD during the flight, but she never did. I could never do this - I want my precious ones near me during a flight, especially an 8 hour one!

Here-

www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/wildlife/7876547/Elle-Macpherson-apologises-over-rhino-horn-comments.html

I get my judgey pants from the same shop as LizzieVereker; I also have knicker elastic in my eyes. I agree with Annetwacky (great name btw).

For people that say they have/will travel in a higher class than their DC - your selfish desire for luxury does not trump the needs/comfort of the other passengers. Your DC are no problem FOR YOU; they are someone else's problem. Poor kiddos.

Don't be so sodding ridiculous, flatbread. Your children are in loco parentis at school. Flight attendants cannot be held responsible for protecting unaccompanied kids for up to 24 hr flights. And in that particular worst case scenario, the emotional repercussions of not being able to comfort your children will be huge....I wouldn't want that.

MrsDeVere - I have flown business with DH in economy, we're still married.
Mine was a business trip, so paid by company. DH came along for the weekend. I didn't have enough miles on that airline to upgrade him and he did not think the difference was worth it to pay for the business ticket from our own pocket. Yes, I probably could have downgraded, but I had to go to work straight from airport, so I needed to sleep. So sounded like a reasonable solution for us.
Could have been the same in this situation, maybe she only had 2 business class tickets, didn't want to favour one child over the other and decided that an adult nanny needs the legroom more than a child?

I don't mind all that at all. I wouldn't do it, we'd all just do business.

But I'd probably feel the same as midnite if someone asked me to pass their child a sick bag. The last thing I want on long haul is some one else's child to think about at all.

If nothing is said and they are by themselves then fine.

I'm not jealous. We can afford and have flown business. I do not make my children the potential burden of others. Nor should I expect others who are strangers to help my children should turbulence result in fear or sickness.

The main drive for my views are not envy and jealously . You have children you should look after them.

For the benefit of children and other travellers, airlines should not allow a family group to separate itself in this way. UM are trickier; there should be sufficient adult supervision that doesn't rely on other passengers.

I have friends where the husband travels in business or first and the wife in economy. I imagine that wouldn't go down well with most but they justify it as husband is working at destination albeit briefly.

" On British Airways operated flights, children under the age of 12 years must be accompanied by a person of 16 years of age or above.
The person accompanying the child can be a family member, guardian or other appointed person.
If the child cannot be accompanied by a family member, guardian or other appointed person, he/she must be registered with our Skyflyer Solo service or we will be unable to accept them for travel".

Children over 6 can fly as UM - flight must direct.

They were on the same plane though, not like she would take Qatar and sent kids with Ryanair.
So DC should get everything parents do, not to feel less important? So if I shop in Reiss, it's really mean to by DC clothes from H&M?
Or alternatively, I have a membership card that gives me a room upgrade in a certain hotel chain. One room only though. Again I don't see anything wrong with putting DC into the standard room and take the upgrade for me and DH - would most people refuse the upgrade or give the suite to DC?

Flatbread just for info do you or have you had children of that age group?

This age group would learn no lessons about entitlement from being treated differently and separately from other family members and from feeling a burden to their mother. They would either think nothing if it or sad.

So the problem is that they were treated differently? As someone already asked, would it be ok if mum was 10 rows behind them in economy? You can't always get seats together for the whole family.
If the problem is that the DC were alone then that's no different from UMs - whose parents also selfishly send them travelling all alone.

ledkr as the mother of an 8 year old I can vouch that mine would know there is a big difference in business class and economy and would certainly feel more than a bit sad. If I tried to do the same I am sure that ds would talk his way into getting an upgrade to first!

It just makes me wonder how these dcs are treated at home - out of sight out of mind.

The problem is if the person next to the child in economy has to do anything at all. So sick bag request for example.

UM responsibility is with airline staff.

My dh used to fly escorted at 7 with his brother of 5 on trans atlantic flights. He said they were left alone for long periods of the flight. They both hated it and his brother often wet himself/spilled drinks during the flight.

A man tried to leave his 2 children with me on an easyjet flight and ran off to a seat at the back- I quickly ran up after him offered my seat so they could all sit together. He looked gutted!

My sister has flown to see us by herself, the 1st time she did it she was 7, we did pay extra for her to be looked after by the hostesses. I think the looking after mostly invloved giving her cake, but she was happy!

Lucky nanny getting to sit in club class!

marcopront sounds like I have been seriously unlucky with my flights. (The aggressive drunk bloke was the real highlight - pretty sure he wet himself - I blame my husband actually - he liked to look out of the window so I got stuck with the middle seat as usual.)

However, your maths is wrong.

Event happens 6 in 30 or 1 in 5. So 4 in 5 chance of no event. Assuming independence Prob (no event in 2 flights) is 0.8 * 0.8 = 0.64. So Prob (event n at least one flight) = 1 - 0.64 = 0.36.

Hello, I'm the OP and here is another update (sorry, just slept for 12 hours: jetlag and NIGHT FLIGHT).

We flew BA from Orlando so Mom wasn't on business. She seemed very stressed and managed to wind up little girl by shouting "Are you nervous? Are you nervous?" She went to get a cabin crew lady who came down and told the kids that they could ask her for help, by which time the Mum in front said that she too would help the kids. We never saw Mom again until we were landing ( actually landing with the seatbelt sign on) when she came back, told the kids off for spreading their stuff everywhere, got their bags out of the lockers and... Here's the best bit....

DH said that he would wait with the kids until the plane emptied and she could come down to collect them. Mom said "no" and told the kids to get off the plane themselves and meet them all in the - oh whatsitcalled, that walkway thingy between the plane and the lounge?

We couldn't sit togetther on the way out but were allocated 2x2 seats with 1adult per child but in the same row. Coming back we paid £100 to get 4 seats together (ish as it was a 777 and most of the seats were 3x3. As it was a night flight I sat with our kids so that DH could get some sleep as he had a 4 hour drive from Gatwick to home.

We were in row 30 so pretty far back from the plane. As Mom said, she was 3sets of "plane" to walk through before they got to her.

The son was a bit standoffish but spent the night sleeping on/cuddled up next to DH who fortunately didn't mind.

Get this, Mom was American, kids English. Was she StepMom and only paid business for HER child and HER nanny???? The mind boggles!

goodness, sounds like an evil stepmum from a fairy tale!

YABU to use the phrase "my precious ones"

I think that mother sounds like a special case all of her own!

I started flying as a UM at 6, and can't remember having any problems. When I was nine, there was a bomb scare, and we had to make an unscheduled stop in Instanbul overnight. There was about forty UMs. BA were very good, and managed to contact my parents immediately - this was in 1984.

I think I enjoyed it more than flying accompanied.

Still think I'd feel a bit put out if my parents had flown club and left me in steerage class, that said, which they never did.