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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think children should have as much right to treatment for anxiety as adults

26 replies

ReallyTired · 02/11/2012 16:10

My son has been having panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. He witnessed my brother threatening me with a knife five months ago and developed anxiety.

Our GP made a referal for pychological support because ds is too young for medication. The request for pychological support has been refused without anyone speaking to myself or my son. He has no proper assesment and I don't know how to help him.

The letter states he has been refused help because he hasn't made an actual suicide attempt. Its not enough that ds told his teacher that he wanted to hang himself because the bullying from one particular girl was so bad. Adults get medical help for anxiety without playing silly games with paracetamol. I feel that children should be offered help as well.

I feel this is utterly shit.

OP posts:
Fabulousfreaks · 02/11/2012 16:12

That is outrageous, can the GP that referred you do anything further to help? Can you afford private help? How old is your son?

gordyslovesheep · 02/11/2012 16:18

Is that a referral to CAMHS?

Our CAMHS service has been cut so severely that they will only work with kids in psychosis

unfortunately the funds are not there to support kids who need it x

CoolaSchmoola · 02/11/2012 16:20

Write to your MP they actually have more clout than you would think. It's a shocking situation.

Daddelion · 02/11/2012 16:23

We went private.

VerySmallSqueak · 02/11/2012 16:25

That is terrible.The bullying seriously needs addressing as well as the lack of medical support.

I think you need to make a fuss and keep making a fuss.

Hopefully,she who shouts loudest will get her voice heard - that's always been my theory.It seems with so much you really have to scrap to get anywhere.

thebody · 02/11/2012 16:29

Really tired, that's bloody awful, of course your son needs help.

Go back to GP. I second contacting MP..

This is an awful situation for you and ds.

My dd has had REM treatment for anxiety and PTSD and its been fantastic.

Can you afford private( not that you should bloody well have to of course)

ethelb · 02/11/2012 16:29

Does the LEA have councellors they can refer to?

TheOriginalNutcracker · 02/11/2012 16:31

My ds was referred to cahms for anxiety and behavioural issues. We had a couple of sessions of him talking to the psych, and her giving him coping stratagies.

I would definatly write to your mp. I had to do this for a hospital appointment for my dd. We had been waiting for over 6mths, and when i wrote to him he got invloved and she recieved an appointment for within the next 2 weeks.

Original poster
ReallyTired · 02/11/2012 16:31

"Does the LEA have councellors they can refer to? "

I have asked the school nurse, but ds is too young. The only have that at secondary school age. Ds is ten. He is too old for play theraphy and too young for CAMHS.

It's shit!

OP posts:
Courts010 · 02/11/2012 16:32

NO. . Absolutely NOT being unreasonable. I am Angry for you!!

I agree with going to your MP.

QueenStromba · 02/11/2012 17:05

That's awful. It might be worth looking into herbal remedies like Rescue Remedy as a stop gap until you can get him seen - I suffer from anxiety and it stops me having panic attacks on the tube.

dopamax · 02/11/2012 18:50

disgusting, my dd9 has ptsd and finally got the correct help from camhs after 3rd go, got through x2 consultants, art therapist, nurse, all crap.....no help. School then sent a letter and we went to a new hospital setting in our area, as soon as we walked in and met our new therapist we clicked!
dd has regained her childhood due to this wonderful man. He does EMDR sorry if got the letter wrong way? Its bit like tapping but using eye movement and talking therapy aswell.
Keep knocking/banging on drs door till you get seen and dont give up, so glad we did not or we would not be where we are now.

Mylittlepuds · 02/11/2012 19:32

That's disgusting. I've suffered anxiety and have had two lots of counselling and I'm about to get CBT. Children should have easier access.

amillionyears · 02/11/2012 19:38

If you dont get any help from any of the above,start saying you will go to your local newspaper.
That will wake some people up.

TheLightPassenger · 02/11/2012 19:40

I agree, this is dreadful RT, very sorry your son is suffering so. Child MH services seem if anything to be even thinner on the ground than for adults, from what I have heard, which is particularly unfortunate given the reduced options for medication.

DoverBeach · 02/11/2012 19:46

The lack of provision for children is appalling, I absolutely agree with you. The saddest thing is that even a small amount of intervention at this age can have a significant impact.

MajesticWhine · 02/11/2012 20:03

I agree it's disgraceful.
If he is having active thoughts about suicide or self-harm, then you would be perfectly justified in taking him to A&E. Maybe that might lead to some further help.
If you can afford private help, then CBT is the recommended treatment for panic attacks, but it is important you find someone who has training and experience of working with children.

BurningBridges · 02/11/2012 20:50

If you contact a charity called Young Minds, they can advocate on your behalf, and if necessary arrange for you to talk to a child psychiatrist directly (this helpline is for parents not children):

0808 802 5544

www.youngminds.org.uk

My DD also had the EMDR (rapid eye movement) treatment and CBT for post traumatic stress (like thebody's DD upthread) and we had to pay privately, you can't get this sort of intensive support through CAHMS. But if you can't afford that, or would like to talk it through first, go through Young Minds they are fabulous.

Daddelion · 02/11/2012 21:07

I don't think the provision for adults is very good either, at least not where I live.

ethelb · 03/11/2012 23:03

It is crap I had a mini breakdown at 11 and only really started to get over it at 21 as proper counselling kicked in. It has had a knock on effect but tbh I don't think that people really know what to do with children with mental illness so provision is shit

Yes adult provision is crap to but it is actually in existence. Unlike paediatric mental health provision.

lionheart · 03/11/2012 23:16

YANBU. In some places CAMHS is undergoing 'restructuring', which means it is harder to get a service that was spread pretty thin in the first place.

I would echo what others have said here about writing to your MP. It's what I did and it did get a result. Shouldn't have to be that way.

cory · 03/11/2012 23:16

Ds had CAHMS counselling aged 10; noone said he was too young and actually it only took a few sessions to help him. Dd has had ongoing CAHMS treatment for years. So yes, provision exists (at least in some LAs) but you have to shout very loudly. In our case, the school put pressure on CAHMS.

McHappyPants2012 · 03/11/2012 23:27

Op I hope you are getting some support aswell, I would also speak to the cps ( if you called the police cps will be involved) and ask them if they could offer support.

It may also may be helpful to give SS a ring to see if they know any other route to take to get your son the treatment he deserves

freddiefrog · 03/11/2012 23:40

It's truly crap

I've been trying to get treatment for my foster child (and she witnessed god knows what, I can't even begin to think about it tbh) and its like banging my head against a brick wall. No one will help her because she hasn't self-harmed or attempted suicide

We've arranged for a private therapist though our social worker

FreudiansSlipper · 03/11/2012 23:53

That is really terrible

if you look on the counselling directory you may find a therapist suitable for your son or some from of support many are run by charities and offer low cost sessions

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