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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be jealous of the young trendy mums at DC school?

86 replies

MoomieAndFreddie · 30/10/2012 14:56

i live in an area renowned for its teen pregnancies where people have kids young

i had mine relatively young too, i was 26 and 29 respectively but this is old in my area.

and i feel like an absolute granny compared to the mums i see every day at school. i am at least 10 years older than most of them - am only 33 ffs! they are all so trendy and fresh and pretty and SKINNY damn them

they all have this identikit casual style... think long shiny hair thrown up into a messy bun, fresh subtle make up, skinny jeans, slouchy tops, but super groomed, with their immaculately turned out little DC in tow. some of them have like 3 or 4 DC and still look about 14 years old fgs. and did i mention they are ALL SO DAMN SKINNY

OP posts:

FunBagFreddie · 30/10/2012 20:11

OP, if it makes you feel any better, I was one of those skinny young early 20's mums with a pert bum, and I am now all haggard with a saggy arse at nearly 36!

TheReturnOfBridezilla · 30/10/2012 20:17

I'm late twenties with one dc just about to start school and the other one two years younger. Am dreading the school gates if this thread is indicative of the general attitude.

Fwiw you can be relatively young and good looking with a happy marriage/ lack of insecurity complex/ attractive partner/ bit of money / whatever else is being inferred here.

I was married and pregnant at 24 with my own house, good job, social life and nice clothes. Some people just fall pregnant sooner rather than later. Why does being slim and well turned out have to be a trade off for another aspect of your life.

Waitingforastartofall · 30/10/2012 20:17

I am a young mum at 22 my Ds is 5, but I'm not of the swishy haired, full make up designer clothes evariety so I don't fit anywhere just hover on the edge waiting for Ds then make my escape

TheReturnOfBridezilla · 30/10/2012 20:18

Although my ass arse is no longer quite as pert as it used to be.

TheReturnOfBridezilla · 30/10/2012 20:19

Sorry, autocorrect would evidently rather I spoke American.

StaceymReadyForNumber3 · 30/10/2012 20:23

I was never overly skinny but I was 22 when dd started school and nobody talked to me it was awful :(

Thankfully the mums in ds's year were much better, he started when I was 24. We all get on great but I do get ribbed for being the youngest parent whenever the subject of age comes up (normally on the nights out).

An now pregnant with dc3 who will start school when I am 30 and I'm very much looking forward to not being the youngest parent in the school year!

So YABU about the age, YANBU about the skinniness!

recall · 30/10/2012 20:31

Our school is a bit of a challenge, most of the Mums are very rich and thin, regardless of age, I get more conscious of my old banger car than the clothes. There is one Mum who is a singer in a famous band, and she will come to school drop off in huge platform heels, fishnet tights, and a scarlet dress, wearing a tweed hat like she was going clubbing, and she walks along the road waving her arms about and singing Welsh folk music. Her hair is trendy and blond and usually sort of up. i am absolutely fascinated by her. She is very nice and friendly. One day I was talking to her and noticed an Owl perched on the back of one of the car seats.

recall · 30/10/2012 20:33

I forgot to mention - she has a body to die for too

recall · 30/10/2012 20:34

and whenever I talk to her, i turn into Miranda

aldiwhore · 30/10/2012 20:34

I'm 38, about as ungroomed as you can get, but I distract from my lack of grooming by wearing fabulous knitwear. Damn, I'm just not getting it am I?

LadyEvilBeagle · 30/10/2012 20:42

Who recall?
I'm dying of curiosity now.
All I can think of is Cerys Matthews, but I'm old.
My school gate years were fine, but the maximum in the whole school during ds's time was 10, and two of the parents had two kids.
Apart from those that have moved, I'm still mates with all of them, and we were and are all shapes, sizes and ages.

RonettePulaski · 30/10/2012 20:43

I'm interested in this school gate angst. Mine aren't old enough for school,, but surely you arrive, the child goes into school, you leave. And and the end of the day the child walks out of school, you take their hand and leave? So when does all this judging and comparing and cliqueiness take place. In those few short seconds?
I just know I'm going up be crap and the one doing whatever it is one is meant to be doing wrong but I can't quite understand how there is time?

gettingeasier · 30/10/2012 20:50

Never gave a toss about the play ground or the people in it thank goodness

Justreadthefuckingwords · 30/10/2012 22:03

I put mine on the bus at 7.30 (in my dressing gown - it stops at my gates) & welcome them home at 4.30 (in me finery).

It's the only way to go.

amillionyears · 30/10/2012 22:14

I was the same age as most the mums at our school,and dressed much the same too, which looking back,was pretty ideal.
I cant think of a single thing you can do about it tbh.
Short of changing schools which is a bit drastic!

foreverondiet · 30/10/2012 22:24

Lose weight, go to the gym, grow your hair and you'll look young too

7to25 · 30/10/2012 22:54

I am 53 with an eight year old.
No amount of dieting, trendiness, gym or plastic surgery will turn me into a yummy.
Indeed my friend asked me how I dae to stand next to them.

SamSmalaidh · 30/10/2012 22:57

My sister is 24 and this is exactly how she dresses Skinny jeans, slouchy top, ugg boots, long shiny extensions hair. I am only 4 years older than her but cannot be bothered!

VintageRainBoots · 30/10/2012 22:58

I'm in the opposite end of the spectrum: I'm the youngest mum in my daughter's class. In our area, couples delay having children until their late 30s or early 40s. However, I had my daughter when I was 30.

Yes, I was 30 years old when I gave birth to our daughter and I'm the youngest mum in our area. [eyeroll]

JollyJackOLantern · 30/10/2012 23:00

I'll be 30 the year Ds starts school (bloody hell, how did that happen??!) and I def won't be looking all trendy at the school gates. Make up won't be involved. Pyjamas are more likely.

However, I'm quite comfortable with my saggy tummy/boobs. I have a wonderful husband and a beautiful , amazing, delightful (pfb) son. Why would I be jealous of anybody else? If I was them I woudn't have my Ds.

Procrasstinator · 30/10/2012 23:06

I can see the benefits of being a young mum for sure; but when i was in my 20's I would have been a terrible mum....

I had alot of fun!

you cant regret those carefree days surely??

Procrasstinator · 30/10/2012 23:08

ronette those few short seconds can feel like hours....

MunchMunch · 30/10/2012 23:10

Sounds like alot of the mam's at dd's school. Im the old haggard minger

VintageRainBoots · 30/10/2012 23:10

I wanted to add: Last week my daughter and I were invited over for a mummy-daughter playdate thing. The very first thing the other mum asked me was, "So, why did you decided to have children so young?"

She later mentioned she was 49 years old; I'm "only" 35 years old. Our daughters are in the same kindergarten (reception) class.

(Yes, we live in a rather wealthy area.)

StrawberryTot · 30/10/2012 23:20

I'm one of the youngest parents at my dd's school, and I've found the opposite in that its all the older mums who are preened, pulled, waxed, peroxided and sprayed beyond recognition it's highly amused me!

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