I suffer from crushing emetophobia, which a fear of vomit and vomiting. Its so bad that I have endured many different therapies to try and combat it, they've all helped to some extent but not cured me. I don't think I can be cured. I've been like this since I was a child.
My friends have gone on holiday and me, dh and my 2 year old ds have been flat sitting for them. Last night ds stayed with my dad so me and dh could have a nice night in. When I rang dad this morning to see if ds was up yet, dad said he'd been up since 3am throwing up. My dh has gone back immediately (I should explain, we live with my dad, so when ds was at dads he was home) to care for him. I so wanted to go too but I just couldnt. I was shaking and crying, I just couldnt. I feel like the worst mother in the world. My gorgeous boy needs me. I want to cuddle him so much. I just cant make myself leave here and go to him. I'm so terrified.
WWYD? I know, I am a terrible person. I do so want to be with my ds. I just can't :(