You are depriving a village of it's idiot...

[OhlimpPricks]

And others. There was a thread a couple of years back where everybody gave their best one-liners, and scathing put downs. Can't find it, but maybe it's time for a new one [hgrin]

I have a lovely relationship with my boss, and we banter back and forth, the more evil and rude the better.

Help - I'm running out of retorts. The ruder the better!

I also fine just "so's your face" is a pretty good comeback to any insult when I can't be bothered.

For e.g. "You're stupid" "so's your face"

"I'd insult you, but there's just too much material for me to work with and I'm tired"

Noel Edmonds called, he wants his jumper back

Why don't your shoes invite your trousers down for tea? (if ankle flappers obv)

Abby and Billy [hgrin]

My god, you really have OD'd on stupid pills today haven't you ??

Well you're the best cure for a hard-on aren't you ??

"It's true what they say.... beauty fades but dumb lasts forever"

"The only difference between you and a supermarket trolley is that a supermarket trolley has a mind of its own..."

I've always defended you.

It's wrong what they all say about you, you're alright.

Can someone get me some Canesten? I appear the be in the company of one irritating cunt...

The wheel is spinning but the hamster died a long long time ago...

Love the thread! Reading it out to DH, he has reserved ontheedgeofwhatever's to use at work!

You clearly snuck into the gene pool when the life guard wasn't looking.

Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you can be yourself.

One of a group of youths shouted over to DSis and I 'Suck my cock '. DSis shouted back instantly 'I would, but it would get stuck in my teeth'. Loved her a little bit more after that

Love that growlithe

You're such a cunt, even your goldfish wants you dead.

"Does your institution know you're missing?"

"I would answer that but I really don't have time to explain it to you"

"You should try for a Darwin Award. You have the talent for it"

"You know we should treasure you really. Survival of the fittest will probably mean you won't be around much longer"

If it's true that what you don't know can't hurt you, you're going to live forever.

haha, I can't really help, I just wander round work telling the chefs to STFU and cook shit. I am a huge fan of telling them to "fuck you, and the horse you rode in on too" I know it's daft but it never fails to tickle me.

Look at all that perfectly good space you're wasting

And to think, there you are using up oxygen < shaking head sadly>