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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to gently poke sleeping baby ds to make sure he is ok?

87 replies

Fairylea · 24/10/2012 22:27

I can't help it. :)

He's a much longed for second baby after a 9 year age gap... he's 4 months old.

Every so often when he's asleep, usually before I go to sleep, I give him a little gentle stroke on his head or prod him to make sure he's breathing ok :)

I'm mean aren't I?

OP posts:

numbum · 24/10/2012 23:01

I did this with DS when he was the only newborn on the ward not screaming....and I still do it nearly eight years later!

Softlysoftly · 24/10/2012 23:04

I don't poke as shes a never ever ever light sleeper but I avidly watch DD2s little flashing light on her breathing monitor, she's 5 months, I love this age all milky smiles, and I know when she's awake as she raspberries in disgust at having been conned out of my arms :)

I do poke DD1 as she has had her monitor removed at nearly 3 then as she's awake she may as well come in my bed.
Have been known to prod DH to check but he gets awfully grumpy

Softlysoftly · 24/10/2012 23:06

Does anyone else turn round at traffic lights to give them a pros in their carseat or am I odd?

Mrsjay · 24/10/2012 23:07

yanbu I remember that horrible feeling when dd1 slept through the night and i woke at 6 am it was just dreadful , I did prod her after that as before she was waking every 2 hours to be fed then she just went through the night,

procrastinor · 24/10/2012 23:09

Awwww. I totally do this. I love that little sigh that children do, it's like the sound of contentment. My DS has just started talking more, but when he was only saying the odd thing, I went into his room stroked his head and he sighed and went 'ma'. My heart melted and I may have cried

LadyEvilBeagle · 24/10/2012 23:13

I poked ds when he started sleeping through the night, just to check.
He's 17 now and I know during the holidays he sleeps all day and stays up half the night.
But I have been known to bang on his door to check he's still alive .
It never goes away.

Mrsjay · 24/10/2012 23:14

But I have been known to bang on his door to check he's still alive .
It never goes away.

Never ever I knock on the door in the holidays just to say good night to them

goingcuckoo · 24/10/2012 23:49

Ha, you are so NBU! In fact I may or may still do this even now when my eldest is 9.

Both 9 and 5 year old's get a gentle prod to make sure they're all fine. anxious, me?!

goingcuckoo · 24/10/2012 23:54

Aww, just read the rest of the thread (as opposed to just the OP! and see that even 11 and 12 year olds still get prodded, and uni aged peeps checked for breathing too!
Makes me feel less neurotic, lol.
Anyone else prod then if they wake up, quickly leg it out of the bedroom before they wake up and clock sight of you?!

manticlimactic · 25/10/2012 00:01

I remember when DD was tiny and in the moses basket next to the bed. I woke up and looked at her. She was so still, didn't seem to be breathing I panicked and picked her up and she was all floppy. Cue panicking even more! Turned out she was fine and once I'd calmed ,I realised she would have been floppy because she was asleep.

Lueji · 25/10/2012 00:30

I used to do that when DS was in the womb. [hblush]

And then a baby.

He's 7 now, so not anymore, unless he is ill. Like tonight.

JustSpidero · 25/10/2012 00:37

Another one who still does this - my DD is 8.

FIL apparently used to check on DH and his brothers before he went to bed even when they were teenagers .

Spuddybean · 25/10/2012 00:47

My mum still does it to me and i'm 35! I sleep very quietly. All my partners have done it too, as well as my best friend. i am quite used to waking up to see someone peering at me intently with a protruding finger and them say 'just checking'.

I also do it with DS who is 6 weeks old. Though sadly it looks like i wont get the opportunity tonight, he has made it clear sleep is not on the agenda and poor old boob lady can just suck it up :(

MrsRhettButler · 25/10/2012 00:48

I always poke dd1 until she wakes up and smiles sleepily and says I love you mummy :)

She's 7 though, I can't poke dd2 as she's one and will wake up screaming if I do so I content myself with standing ever so quietly and watching her chest rise and fall.

ShadowsCollideWithPeople · 25/10/2012 01:03

Ah, YANBU, OP. Congratulations on your new wee DS. I bet he is all adorable and snuffly and lovely. Prodding your baby to make sure they are oaky is completely normal. When my sisters and I (32, 27 and 24) stay in my folks' house, my Mum still checks in on us during the night. Just last week, she told me about a dream that she had, where she forgot to pick us up from school. She woke all in a panic, checked our bedrooms and saw that we weren't in them, freaked out a bit, then remembered that we weren't in our bedrooms as we have all moved out. Then sat down on her bed and had a bit of a cry because we weren't there . Bless her, she will never stop worrying about us.

ShadowsCollideWithPeople · 25/10/2012 01:04

Okay, not oaky. An oaky baby would be rather wooden, I reckon!

PropertyNightmare · 25/10/2012 01:06

Yanbu. :-)

WhoWhatWhereWhen · 25/10/2012 01:09

This is lovely, we've all done it

BoffinMum · 25/10/2012 01:10

God, I do it all the time! My eldest is 25 and I still check her!!! (When she is at home)

Alligatorpie · 25/10/2012 05:07

Dd1 rarely slept so I didn't dare poke her in case she really was asleep and I woke her up. I would listen for her breathing though.
Dd2 is 4 months and sleeps well ( apart from 2 night wakings) I pick her arm and watch it fall, poke her, put my hand on her chest... - I am sure the novelty factor will wear off eventually.

DebbieTitsMcGee · 25/10/2012 05:14

Aren't sleepy babies the most gorgeous thing? Apart from awake babies. My lovely little DS has just fallen back to sleep on the boob and is making tiny contented squeaks. I'm knackered but he's too cute for me not to stay awake and watch for a bit [hsmile]

NapaCab · 25/10/2012 05:22

Yes, I've done that too! Most recently, yesterday morning at 4am, I woke up in a sweat as I'm recovering from a stomach bug and got paranoid about DS (1) so went to check on him. I inadvertently woke him up and he would NOT go back to sleep no matter what I did until finally at 6am I brought him into bed with me and he finally fell asleep.

I felt like such an idiot for waking him up, especially since I'm ill myself and needed the sleep, but I can't help it. I'll probably still be doing it when he's 10 years old or something...

Hyperballad · 25/10/2012 05:25

I do it? I love the loud grumbly noise he makes while shaking his head as if to say 'get off mum!'

It's a warm reassuring fuzzy noise!

I'm sure I'll feel different when he's 16.

EverythingInMjiniature · 25/10/2012 05:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Fairylea · 25/10/2012 06:15

Aw such lovely stories... I'm sure I'll still be poking ds and dd when they are grown ups!

I felt sad for that mum mentioned here who had the bad dream and thought she didn't pick her (adult) babies up... but they had long moved out! That must be hard.

And goingcuckoo... I do that too ! Prod and listen and run !!

OP posts:

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